Ftrain, by Paul Ford

September 2016

Sep 30, 2016

If the Democrats truly want to defeat Trump they should...

If the Democrats truly want to defeat Trump they should just send him a few more Android phones.
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Sep 30, 2016

Life itself is the true gift-based content....

Life itself is the true gift-based content. twitter.com/...
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Sep 30, 2016

the broken glass budget on this film far exceeds the killer...

@lauraolin @AGoldmund the broken glass budget on this film far exceeds the killer robots budget which is frankly a misalignment of resources
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Sep 30, 2016

oh my god this movie is actually about killer robots at the...

@AGoldmund @lauraolin oh my god this movie is actually about killer robots at the mall
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Sep 30, 2016

making up alternate titles doesn't make chopping mall more...

@AGoldmund @lauraolin making up alternate titles doesn't make chopping mall more real
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Sep 30, 2016

sonia that response is perfection

@soniasaraiya sonia that response is perfection
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Sep 30, 2016

I need a vacation except instead of a vacation I need to go...

I need a vacation except instead of a vacation I need to go somewhere and talk about my thoughts on Google Inbox.
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Sep 29, 2016

hey! We love webpack!

@TheLarkInn hey! We love webpack!
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Sep 29, 2016

I wish I could go back in time and tell my younger self...

I wish I could go back in time and tell my younger self that it's okay to love writing in-depth memos about complex technology systems.
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Sep 29, 2016

sorry not emulator!

@ftrain sorry not emulator!
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Sep 29, 2016

If you asked Trump for his favorite foreign leader would he...

If you asked Trump for his favorite foreign leader would he have been able to stop himself from saying Obama?
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Sep 28, 2016

everything is squiffy

@adamatsya everything is squiffy
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Sep 28, 2016

this thread is like pure market research for us!

@xor @waxpancake this thread is like pure market research for us!
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Sep 28, 2016

hi! It's a complicated thing and there are many people...

@xor @waxpancake hi! It's a complicated thing and there are many people getting involved. Google's plans are...idk?
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Sep 28, 2016

yes! Haughey asked too. We will follow up with an email!

@shellen yes! Haughey asked too. We will follow up with an email!
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Sep 28, 2016

with their eyes clooooooosed and accessibility mode on

@timbray with their eyes clooooooosed and accessibility mode on
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Sep 28, 2016

here's to the crazy ones, the ones that have a real need,...

@timbray here's to the crazy ones, the ones that have a real need, the ones that sleep on their toes, and when they're on the street, they—
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Sep 28, 2016

My wife bought this for our cat to help it grieve for the...

My wife bought this for our cat to help it grieve for the other cat. twitter.com/...
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Sep 28, 2016

1/In Vitro, Veritas 2/The Fertile Hurdle 3/Ovumheard 4/Test...

@doree @MattMira 1/In Vitro, Veritas 2/The Fertile Hurdle 3/Ovumheard 4/Test Tube Maybe 5/The Embryo Show 6/Challenge Your Conceptions
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Sep 28, 2016

They are all very talented, smart individuals in a busy...

@jessamyn @nypl_labs They are all very talented, smart individuals in a busy industry and will go on, but what a fine team doing fine work.
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Sep 28, 2016

Note: The @nypl_labs team is really, really good.

Note: The @nypl_labs team is really, really good.
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Sep 28, 2016

oh no https://twitter.com/blprnt/status/781159723630469120

oh no twitter.com/...
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Sep 28, 2016

I just don't understand how someone couldn't be excited...

@anildash I just don't understand how someone couldn't be excited about this. Is this even America any more?
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Sep 28, 2016

What if they sang U2's “One” together?

@tressiemcphd What if they sang U2's “One” together?
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Sep 28, 2016

I also would probably vote for MJB over HRC because I think...

I also would probably vote for MJB over HRC because I think she would be less likely to get us into a war in Syria. But scruples.
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Sep 28, 2016

And a lot of the pain is the result of trying to connect. I...

And a lot of the pain is the result of trying to connect. I want to see what someone who puts it all out there like MJB can get out of HRC.
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Sep 28, 2016

And she talks a lot (like in the outro to Whole Damn Year)...

And she talks a lot (like in the outro to Whole Damn Year) about how she shares this with her fans. It's a pop version of HRC's narrative.
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Sep 28, 2016

So much of Mary J.'s stuff explains how her vulnerability...

So much of Mary J.'s stuff explains how her vulnerability left her open to terrible abuse but she healed, found strength, and built empathy.
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Sep 28, 2016

I am really excited to watch the Mary J. Blige/HRC...

I am really excited to watch the Mary J. Blige/HRC interview. People are mocking it but... google.com/...
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Sep 28, 2016

I have the police report; they just wrote "clearly partner...

@associatesmind I have the police report; they just wrote "clearly partner track"
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Sep 28, 2016

The problem is that the lawyer hatchlings eat the other...

The problem is that the lawyer hatchlings eat the other babies. twitter.com/...
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Sep 28, 2016

Immediately began wondering what it would be like to get...

Immediately began wondering what it would be like to get twin whales to kindergarten. twitter.com/...
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Sep 28, 2016

I'm not some scientist who can tell you who exactly sent...

@sealln I'm not some scientist who can tell you who exactly sent the huge flaming lightning bolt of warning.
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Sep 28, 2016

Hmm https://twitter.com/bocavista2016/status/780994750019231...

Hmm twitter.com/...
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Sep 27, 2016

hehehehehe it's SOOOOO GOOOD

@harrisj hehehehehe it's SOOOOO GOOOD
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Sep 27, 2016

but it hurts to get up from my chair...

but it hurts to get up from my chair twitter.com/...
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Sep 27, 2016

I love this podcast episode with the editors of...

I love this podcast episode with the editors of @cloverletter—they realized hidden value in *email* and went for it. soundcloud.com/...
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Sep 27, 2016

If he can't stand to look at you, how can he claim to...

If he can't stand to look at you, how can he claim to represent you? Etc etc
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Sep 27, 2016

You could do a "Trump isn't just worried about MY health"...

You could do a "Trump isn't just worried about MY health" power move and then list all the kinds of bodies he hates.
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Sep 26, 2016

Unvarnished truth https://twitter.com/kenvogel/status/780582...

Unvarnished truth twitter.com/...
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Sep 26, 2016

Don't let the pigeon drive the narrative....

Don't let the pigeon drive the narrative. twitter.com/...
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Sep 26, 2016

https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/780543019678334982/photo/1

twitter.com/...
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Sep 26, 2016

https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/780537547885862912/photo/1

twitter.com/...
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Sep 26, 2016

https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/780537461860659200/photo/1

twitter.com/...
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Sep 26, 2016

https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/780537446840799232/photo/1

twitter.com/...
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Sep 26, 2016

panic attack nightmare juice

@rustyk5 panic attack nightmare juice
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Sep 26, 2016

We're launching a labs at @PostlightAgency! Come check it...

We're launching a labs at @PostlightAgency! Come check it out—October 20. meetup.com/...
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Sep 26, 2016

your future press secretary https://twitter.com/chelseybcoom...

your future press secretary twitter.com/...
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Sep 26, 2016

things are lookin' up, Ashwin!

@ashwindeshmukh things are lookin' up, Ashwin!
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Sep 26, 2016

Got to give it to those dolphins they just wanted it more.

Got to give it to those dolphins they just wanted it more.
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Sep 26, 2016

The next couple weeks are gonna be pretty rough.

@jimaley The next couple weeks are gonna be pretty rough.
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Sep 26, 2016

Because that's perfect.

@jimaley Because that's perfect.
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Sep 26, 2016

Watch the American shit circus?

@jimaley Watch the American shit circus?
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Sep 26, 2016

🤑👑🍊🇺🇸

@jimaley 🤑👑🍊🇺🇸
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Sep 26, 2016

Uncle.

Uncle.
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Sep 26, 2016

Oh don't worry it'll just be a single emoji.

@jimaley Oh don't worry it'll just be a single emoji.
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Sep 25, 2016

This was some primo shit https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/3...

This was some primo shit twitter.com/...
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Sep 25, 2016

paint that shit on your van and just drive you know?

@studiesincrap paint that shit on your van and just drive you know?
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Sep 25, 2016

Rocannon's world (#1) is really devastating if I'm...

@studiesincrap Rocannon's world (#1) is really devastating if I'm remembering it.
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Sep 25, 2016

you've ruined my week

@hondanhon you've ruined my week
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Sep 25, 2016

When people say things are “pure nonsense” they're usually...

When people say things are “pure nonsense” they're usually talking max 40% nonsense, but this is 100% real pure black tar foolish nonsense. twitter.com/...
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Sep 25, 2016

when is the last one I need to read the last one

@hondanhon when is the last one I need to read the last one
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Sep 25, 2016

I had two anxiety dreams last night. 1, Hillary didn't show...

I had two anxiety dreams last night. 1, Hillary didn't show up at the debate. 2, they put a center for violent offenders above kindergarten.
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Sep 25, 2016

I'm not an expert but that seems bad.

I'm not an expert but that seems bad.
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Sep 25, 2016

To fix this sinking, leaning San Francisco skyscraper, they...

To fix this sinking, leaning San Francisco skyscraper, they may need to remove the top 20 floors. mobile.nytimes.com/...
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Sep 25, 2016

still makes me...well, just really sad.

@buzz still makes me...well, just really sad.
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Sep 25, 2016

I just have this memory of a visceral certainty of being...

@buzz I just have this memory of a visceral certainty of being lied to, by my shitty government and my shitty hometown newspaper.
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Sep 24, 2016

https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/779856136237355008/photo/1

twitter.com/...
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Sep 24, 2016

hehehe i didn't even parse that before i blanked out and...

@esouthard hehehe i didn't even parse that before i blanked out and fell to the floor
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Sep 24, 2016

i wonder what the senior policy council of an ecommerce...

i wonder what the senior policy council of an ecommerce lobbying firm thinks about government regulation in SF techcrunch.com/...
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Sep 24, 2016

“Her vote in favor of the Iraq war is a black mark,” says...

“Her vote in favor of the Iraq war is a black mark,” says the NYTimes, which should have changed “Her” to “Our.” nytimes.com/...
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Sep 23, 2016

no one is discussing funding shitposts

@rustyk5 no one is discussing funding shitposts
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Sep 23, 2016

I sort of miss it I could use an old school BBS RN

@heatheremerrick I sort of miss it I could use an old school BBS RN
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Sep 23, 2016

The story takes an Oculus twist....

The story takes an Oculus twist. twitter.com/...
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Sep 23, 2016

tmux always looks good.

@adampash tmux always looks good.
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Sep 23, 2016

i can't live like that not knowing what's happening around...

@dunndunndunn i can't live like that not knowing what's happening around me.
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Sep 23, 2016

listen i try to live my life in balance with the universe

@dunndunndunn listen i try to live my life in balance with the universe
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Sep 23, 2016

react/don't hate it/when you want to mutate it/react/don't...

react/don't hate it/when you want to mutate it/react/don't hate it/when you want the DOM
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Sep 23, 2016

no this big stupid linux box under my desk. although i do...

@lloid no this big stupid linux box under my desk. although i do miss my amiga every day. Also check out archive.org/...
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Sep 23, 2016

[[[ To any NSA and FBI agents reading this tweet: please...

@jcsalterego @xor [[[ To any NSA and FBI agents reading this tweet: please consider]]][[[ whether defending the US Constitution against all
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Sep 23, 2016

you should see the batch file conversion i just ran

@xor you should see the batch file conversion i just ran
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Sep 23, 2016

Listen dorks you can install your emacs using stuffit and...

Listen dorks you can install your emacs using stuffit and .hqx files but I'm not about to miss incremental org-mode improvements from HEAD.
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Sep 23, 2016

listen i had a few beers, kids are in bed, and it's time to...

@xor listen i had a few beers, kids are in bed, and it's time to let it out a little
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Sep 23, 2016

Building emacs from source on quad-core: "make clean...

Building emacs from source on quad-core: "make clean && time make" takes 54 seconds, "make clean && time make -j" takes 21 seconds.
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Sep 23, 2016

it's very comforting

@amyhoy it's very comforting
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Sep 23, 2016

i really appreciate how you and I get completely pissed off...

@amyhoy i really appreciate how you and I get completely pissed off at the same stuff
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Sep 23, 2016

programmer exceptionalism makes me SUPER cranky, almost as...

@amyhoy programmer exceptionalism makes me SUPER cranky, almost as much as journalist exceptionalism
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Sep 23, 2016

such a shame

@tolar such a shame
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Sep 23, 2016

https://medium.com/slackjaw/emails-from-a-ceo-whos-making-th...

medium.com/...
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Sep 23, 2016

Mom! I'm in An-Nahar English (a great progressive Lebanese...

Mom! I'm in An-Nahar English (a great progressive Lebanese newspaper)! en.annahar.com/...
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Sep 23, 2016

“We want you on the sled.”

@gregorg “We want you on the sled.”
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Sep 23, 2016

it's harder than solar

@rustyk5 it's harder than solar
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Sep 23, 2016

bill those are each about 160-230 calories depending on how...

@Bill_Braine @michelet bill those are each about 160-230 calories depending on how they are prepared
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Sep 23, 2016

Whenever you feel stressed or down just do what I do and...

Whenever you feel stressed or down just do what I do and look at the 2012 Catsimatidis Christmas card. politico.com/... twitter.com/...
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Sep 23, 2016

America needs a moonshot program to produce a 100-calorie...

America needs a moonshot program to produce a 100-calorie breakfast sandwich.
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Sep 23, 2016

fuck yes I have

@rustyk5 fuck yes I have
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Sep 23, 2016

Lot to unpack here http://pitchfork.com/news/68462-listen-to...

Lot to unpack here pitchfork.com/...
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Sep 23, 2016

Sorry I meant "our company"

Sorry I meant "our company"
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Sep 23, 2016

$3 billion to cure every disease and $700 million to start...

$3 billion to cure every disease and $700 million to start some new ones. twitter.com/...
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Sep 23, 2016

Hi my company @PostlightAgency welcomes applicants of every...

Hi my company @PostlightAgency welcomes applicants of every background and orientation and Facebook will probably never buy us.
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Sep 22, 2016

This manual for Guile Scheme's “Fibers” has a helpful...

This manual for Guile Scheme's “Fibers” has a helpful explanation of how concurrency works/doesn't github.com/...
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Sep 22, 2016

10 little years! http://www.zeldman.com/2016/09/22/ten-years...

10 little years! zeldman.com/...
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Sep 22, 2016

Grant me the courage to accept the polls I cannot change.

Grant me the courage to accept the polls I cannot change.
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Sep 22, 2016

wow that is a model of the form

@Tulletilsynet wow that is a model of the form
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Sep 22, 2016

Really nice story of data processing millions of stars...

Really nice story of data processing millions of stars “Torrenting the galaxy” by @flimshaw @flimshaw/torrenting-the-galaxy-extracting-2-million-3d-stars-from-180gb-of-csvs-457ff70c0f93?source=twitterShare-168dab556633-1474547280" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.com/@flimshaw/torrenting-the-galaxy-extracting-2-million-3d-stars-from-180gb-of-csvs-457ff70c0f93?source=twitterShare-168dab556633-1474547280
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Sep 21, 2016

okay after ten minutes i can say: this game is a...

okay after ten minutes i can say: this game is a life-destroying nightmare twitter.com/...
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Sep 21, 2016

tfw u get home from the user's group meeting to have some...

tfw u get home from the user's group meeting to have some alone time with your cheryl tiegs watch simulator archive.org/... twitter.com/...
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Sep 21, 2016

whoa @textfiles dug up a genuinely batshit pile of...

whoa @textfiles dug up a genuinely batshit pile of shareware weirdness archive.org/...
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Sep 21, 2016

they subsist on pastries that they buy off elf-maidens at...

@bn2b @guydeboredom they subsist on pastries that they buy off elf-maidens at the middle earth inn
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Sep 21, 2016

The MSM likes to say it's NOT hollow, because they can't...

@bn2b @guydeboredom The MSM likes to say it's NOT hollow, because they can't risk offending the gold-mining elves.
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Sep 21, 2016

I have traveled oceans of time to keep you from going to...

@buzz @tolar @DanielZarick I have traveled oceans of time to keep you from going to college
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Sep 21, 2016

Eaton's a real good dude help him out....

Eaton's a real good dude help him out. twitter.com/...
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Sep 21, 2016

If you need to get Google AMP in your life with zero effort...

If you need to get Google AMP in your life with zero effort check out mercury.postlight.com right now. twitter.com/...
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Sep 21, 2016

two good friends helping each other out...

two good friends helping each other out twitter.com/...
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Sep 21, 2016

In my role as software entrepreneur I wrote something about...

In my role as software entrepreneur I wrote something about immigration, “My Co-Founder, the Skittle” trackchanges.postlight.com/...
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Sep 21, 2016

i love how in this article everyone in nyc seems like the...

@buzz @DanielZarick i love how in this article everyone in nyc seems like the emperor in return of the jedi.
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Sep 20, 2016

Parenting and/or self-care tip: They make “chewelry” for...

Parenting and/or self-care tip: They make “chewelry” for people with a sensory need to chew. These look like Legos: arktherapeutic.com/...
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Sep 20, 2016

This article created within me a desperate desire to move...

This article created within me a desperate desire to move to Chicago. chicagobusiness.com/...
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Sep 20, 2016

Bobbie gets up to cool stuff. https://twitter.com/bobbie/sta...

Bobbie gets up to cool stuff. twitter.com/...
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Sep 20, 2016

that's about right

@Beschizza that's about right
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Sep 20, 2016

thanks, and yep--Sam is fantastic. @richziade

@zentree thanks, and yep--Sam is fantastic. @richziade
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Sep 20, 2016

sigh. Welp. There's $100 very confused dollars if anyone...

@digiphile sigh. Welp. There's $100 very confused dollars if anyone needs them.
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Sep 20, 2016

I guess some poor programmer at 538 is being pushed to...

I guess some poor programmer at 538 is being pushed to adjust the CMS to allow for 300pt headline that just reads “PANIC.”
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Sep 20, 2016

I'm sorry I'm guessing this is not the sort of thing where...

@digiphile I'm sorry I'm guessing this is not the sort of thing where I can donate $100 and things get better?
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Sep 20, 2016

oh lord Alex I just sell product development services now...

@digiphile oh lord Alex I just sell product development services now I'm not in the media
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Sep 20, 2016

Oh sorry retweeted wrong. Sigh. These are smart people who...

Oh sorry retweeted wrong. Sigh. These are smart people who do great, important work. Seems like they have a real plan. twitter.com/...
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Sep 20, 2016

These are smart people who do great, important work. Seems...

These are smart people who do great, important work. Seems like they have a real plan. twitter.com/...
➛
Sep 20, 2016

Rich and I got obsessed with those phone alerts for the...

Rich and I got obsessed with those phone alerts for the podcast m.soundcloud.com/...
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Sep 20, 2016

how is ghost working for you? i would love it if you were...

@djacobs how is ghost working for you? i would love it if you were our first pull request.
➛
Sep 20, 2016

I no longer have even the tiniest shred of desire of any...

I no longer have even the tiniest shred of desire of any kind to see how far this thing goes. theonion.com/...
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Sep 20, 2016

Oh thank God. https://twitter.com/pbowden/status/77800837911...

Oh thank God. twitter.com/...
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Sep 19, 2016

meatself is tired

@tomcoates meatself is tired
➛
Sep 19, 2016

my next thought after sending this tweet was “i should...

@tomcoates my next thought after sending this tweet was “i should probably learn react”
➛
Sep 19, 2016

tom...tom...tom...jesus yes...all the time

@tomcoates tom...tom...tom...jesus yes...all the time
➛
Sep 19, 2016

we really really really really shouldn't we have two...

@leahfinnegan @Choire we really really really really shouldn't we have two kindergartners and a crabby old mangey cat
➛
Sep 19, 2016

my home suffers from severe kitten deficiency

@leahfinnegan @Choire my home suffers from severe kitten deficiency
➛
Sep 19, 2016

more like HEART swelling and brain AF-fection

@leahfinnegan @Choire more like HEART swelling and brain AF-fection
➛
Sep 19, 2016

Between one cup of tea enjoyed with old friends at Cha-An,...

Between one cup of tea enjoyed with old friends at Cha-An, before jumping into a car back to Westport, and the Internet? No contest.
➛
Sep 19, 2016

I don't like to limit my limning.

@skottk I don't like to limit my limning.
➛
Sep 19, 2016

Compared to Ella Fitzgerald singing the Cole Porter Song...

Compared to Ella Fitzgerald singing the Cole Porter Song Book on 180 Gram Vinyl on a Thorens TD124 SME 3009 Series II, the Internet sucks.
➛
Sep 19, 2016

The Internet pales in comparison to limning things. When I...

The Internet pales in comparison to limning things. When I limn I never need the Internet, especially when I limn contours.
➛
Sep 19, 2016

Or small French villages. The Internet has nothing on small...

Or small French villages. The Internet has nothing on small French villages.
➛
Sep 19, 2016

The Internet is okay, but it has nothing on the solitary...

The Internet is okay, but it has nothing on the solitary bark of a fox heard through a cottage's bay window.
➛
Sep 19, 2016

congratulations! you have a head for innovation.

@michaelbshane congratulations! you have a head for innovation.
➛
Sep 19, 2016

I care about everything!

@a1phab3t I care about everything!
➛
Sep 19, 2016

yes but Amazon is an enormous web company that powers much...

@terrybain @amazon yes but Amazon is an enormous web company that powers much of the Internet.
➛
Sep 19, 2016

Okay @Amazon you won an Emmy and good for you but let's not...

Okay @Amazon you won an Emmy and good for you but let's not get ahead of ourselves. twitter.com/...
➛
Sep 19, 2016

There are going to be like five national conversations on...

There are going to be like five national conversations on things today and they are all going to be damned disaster.
➛
Sep 19, 2016

yes at exactly that pace

@EvanHoffman yes at exactly that pace
➛
Sep 19, 2016

My band is called Brooklyn Kindergarten Dropoff and this is...

My band is called Brooklyn Kindergarten Dropoff and this is our first album cover. twitter.com/...
➛
Sep 18, 2016

but my gawd

@sippey but my gawd
➛
Sep 18, 2016

here you go, you can use this to finally find the perfect...

here you go, you can use this to finally find the perfect software to finish your novel brettterpstra.com/... … (tx @mutewinter)
➛
Sep 18, 2016

you did great I enjoyed your reading and you ended the...

@michelledean you did great I enjoyed your reading and you ended the first section with aplomb
➛
Sep 18, 2016

I'm sure that will be a pattern. Climate change real-estate...

I'm sure that will be a pattern. Climate change real-estate corruption is going to be amazing.
➛
Sep 18, 2016

Part of this proposed batshit mega-development is that...

Part of this proposed batshit mega-development is that they'd build flood protection since the city can't pay. twitter.com/...
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Sep 18, 2016

oh that was part of a seltzer thread but it got cut off,...

@joshuatopolsky oh that was part of a seltzer thread but it got cut off, ignore, life short
➛
Sep 18, 2016

Wow @WebSafe2k16 was well-run and cool and weird and I was...

Wow @WebSafe2k16 was well-run and cool and weird and I was lucky to be involved.
➛
Sep 18, 2016

2016 is also an amazing year, because it brought us this....

2016 is also an amazing year, because it brought us this. youtube.com/...
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Sep 18, 2016

Update: I feel bad for complaining.

Update: I feel bad for complaining.
➛
Sep 18, 2016

they just want you to succeed and also somehow to get free...

@michelledean they just want you to succeed and also somehow to get free drinks
➛
Sep 18, 2016

oh my god don't worry about them they're all snugglebugs

@michelledean oh my god don't worry about them they're all snugglebugs
➛
Sep 18, 2016

I complain but they are totally free and I could be...

I complain but they are totally free and I could be improving them and I still love the hell out of Python. So MAYBE the problem is me.
➛
Sep 18, 2016

“How do I parse command-line arguments into a list?” “You...

“How do I parse command-line arguments into a list?” “You mean dynamically sum integers from the command line?” “I'll just read the source.”
➛
Sep 18, 2016

If you want to see examples of Python code that you will...

If you want to see examples of Python code that you will never write, the Python standard library docs are great.
➛
Sep 18, 2016

I can hear them now!

@paul_haine I can hear them now!
➛
Sep 18, 2016

wow imagine those meetings

@infamy_infamy wow imagine those meetings
➛
Sep 18, 2016

just as soon as someone takes off my restraining bolt

@steveluvender just as soon as someone takes off my restraining bolt
➛
Sep 18, 2016

derek i can't tell if you're wearing sunglasses or not what...

@derektmead derek i can't tell if you're wearing sunglasses or not what the fuck is going on
➛
Sep 18, 2016

Wait a minute. Is Microsoft Excel named ExCEL because...

Wait a minute. Is Microsoft Excel named ExCEL because spreadsheets are made of rows of CELLS? Has that been sitting there for 31 years?
➛
Sep 18, 2016

JS learning curve kinda sucks, IMO, but it runs the world,...

@livlab JS learning curve kinda sucks, IMO, but it runs the world, what can you do? Break a leg!
➛
Sep 18, 2016

Yeah it's mega edge-casey I used it once in 10 years to...

@livlab Yeah it's mega edge-casey I used it once in 10 years to figure out how to jam as many objects on screen as possible.
➛
Sep 18, 2016

You can also use Array.prototype.... to add new functions...

@livlab You can also use Array.prototype.... to add new functions to Arrays, which isn't a loved JS pattern but I...like it.
➛
Sep 18, 2016

You can name array size with new Array(10) which is nice if...

@livlab You can name array size with new Array(10) which is nice if you're doing weird stuff where you want to update 2d arrays.
➛
Sep 18, 2016

not very...diplo...matic

@leahfinnegan not very...diplo...matic
➛
Sep 18, 2016

Won't anyone think of the poor innocent studios who want...

@mccarthyryanj Won't anyone think of the poor innocent studios who want only to give succor to struggling artists?
➛
Sep 18, 2016

We got rid of shirt collars in the 1980s so don't tell me...

We got rid of shirt collars in the 1980s so don't tell me we can't do it again today.
➛
Sep 18, 2016

whhhhaaaaaaaaaaaattttttt (our cat is named Gary)

@katyhersh @peterajoseph whhhhaaaaaaaaaaaattttttt (our cat is named Gary)
➛
Sep 18, 2016

Meeee tooooo https://twitter.com/robdubbin/status/7775369889...

Meeee tooooo twitter.com/...
➛
Sep 17, 2016

YESSSSSSSSSSS YESYES JavaScript Systems Music: Learning web...

YESSSSSSSSSSS YESYES JavaScript Systems Music: Learning web audio by recreating the works of Steve Reich & Brian Eno teropa.info/...
➛
Sep 17, 2016

tfw smurfette isn't real https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/7...

tfw smurfette isn't real twitter.com/...
➛
Sep 17, 2016

At dessert did he flansplain?

@SteveBurnsAlive At dessert did he flansplain?
➛
Sep 17, 2016

Ah here's the original SNAKE FIGHT written by Luke Burns...

Ah here's the original SNAKE FIGHT written by Luke Burns mcsweeneys.net/...
➛
Sep 17, 2016

i run love in the cloud

@DockJaw i run love in the cloud
➛
Sep 17, 2016

glad to be here for u

@DockJaw glad to be here for u
➛
Sep 17, 2016

it's a 24-hour batch extraction of images from old files...

@textfiles it's a 24-hour batch extraction of images from old files so...it literally is your brain, yep
➛
Sep 17, 2016

feels good man https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/77712164724...

feels good man twitter.com/...
➛
Sep 17, 2016

oh cool! Good to see. It's slowly percolating.

@HappyHorseSkull oh cool! Good to see. It's slowly percolating.
➛
Sep 16, 2016

the paper stock was great!

@marklotto the paper stock was great!
➛
Sep 16, 2016

there are four corners

@fascinated there are four corners
➛
Sep 16, 2016

Lunch isn't even a problem. Lunch is axiomatic.

Lunch isn't even a problem. Lunch is axiomatic.
➛
Sep 16, 2016

We've got an office on 5th Ave at 17th and once a week some...

We've got an office on 5th Ave at 17th and once a week some startup emails offering to “solve lunch.” Lunch in Manhattan is...solved.
➛
Sep 16, 2016

Might as well buy six bikes a year.

Might as well buy six bikes a year.
➛
Sep 16, 2016

Garages with 100+ cars are supposed to offer bike parking...

Garages with 100+ cars are supposed to offer bike parking in NYC. I emailed one big company for rates: $200/month. twitter.com/...
➛
Sep 16, 2016

I really have no locked in thoughts. I'll go look up Dan...

@KristyT I really have no locked in thoughts. I'll go look up Dan Mall, appreciate it.
➛
Sep 16, 2016

No, that's super-helpful. I'm coming into this without any...

@KristyT No, that's super-helpful. I'm coming into this without any knowledge. Maybe it is part-apprenticeship for some?
➛
Sep 16, 2016

:( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :(...

@KristyT :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :(
➛
Sep 16, 2016

(See you at SXSL btw!)

@KristyT (See you at SXSL btw!)
➛
Sep 16, 2016

Right, partnering people with someone (maybe not in their...

@KristyT Right, partnering people with someone (maybe not in their discipline) for 1..n years.
➛
Sep 16, 2016

Hi! Any good books to read or people to ask about creating...

Hi! Any good books to read or people to ask about creating a good, long-term mentoring program? One of our 2017 goals at @PostlightAgency.
➛
Sep 16, 2016

argh okey dokie

@JPaskin argh okey dokie
➛
Sep 16, 2016

we borrowed neighbors tins so we could get to bed by 11

@drunkenbee we borrowed neighbors tins so we could get to bed by 11
➛
Sep 16, 2016

Brooklyn public school

@wjmaggos Brooklyn public school
➛
Sep 16, 2016

One thing I didn't expect about twins was that we needed to...

One thing I didn't expect about twins was that we needed to make birthday cupcakes for two largish kindergarten classes.
➛
Sep 15, 2016

I don't often talk about how the media platform sausage is...

I don't often talk about how the media platform sausage is made but in this case it's made from cute guinea pigs! trackchanges.postlight.com/...
➛
Sep 15, 2016

and all the funnier for it

@a1phab3t and all the funnier for it
➛
Sep 15, 2016

“Speaker Ryan, I'm calling about the copy of ‘Don't Let the...

“Speaker Ryan, I'm calling about the copy of ‘Don't Let the Pigeon Drive the Bus’ you checked out at the beginning of the Trump campaign.”
➛
Sep 15, 2016

The first thing the new Librarian of Congress should do is...

The first thing the new Librarian of Congress should do is force Congress to pay its late fees.
➛
Sep 15, 2016

for our anniversary I made of list of ways our marriage...

@maureenflaherty for our anniversary I made of list of ways our marriage could be better
➛
Sep 15, 2016

Yeah this is GREAT https://twitter.com/joshuatopolsky/status...

Yeah this is GREAT twitter.com/...
➛
Sep 14, 2016

I want to be very clear that this is the last time that I...

I want to be very clear that this is the last time that I will have gone in there.
➛
Sep 14, 2016

Despite what you say I am well within my rights to turn off...

Despite what you say I am well within my rights to turn off the special light, given your complete disregard for our policy on peeps.
➛
Sep 14, 2016

Again this is not the time to argue about the definition of...

Again this is not the time to argue about the definition of a peep, nor to argue that thumps are not peeps. Thumps emphatically are peeps.
➛
Sep 14, 2016

That was a peep and as we explored and according to our...

That was a peep and as we explored and according to our understanding there will now be consequences, starting with me coming in there.
➛
Sep 14, 2016

I do not at this time want to discuss what qualifies as a...

I do not at this time want to discuss what qualifies as a peep. The important thing is not what is a peep but that there must be zero peeps.
➛
Sep 14, 2016

But again it is my stated policy to not go in there.

But again it is my stated policy to not go in there.
➛
Sep 14, 2016

The thing that will get me to go in there is one peep.

The thing that will get me to go in there is one peep.
➛
Sep 14, 2016

I don't want to have to go in there but if it doesn't stop...

I don't want to have to go in there but if it doesn't stop I am going in there and there are going to be consequences.
➛
Sep 14, 2016

This is gross, @sukisworld is a great journalist. The Times...

This is gross, @sukisworld is a great journalist. The Times sets her up AND then then dismisses her work. twitter.com/...
➛
Sep 14, 2016

they rejected me for being “too irish”

@harper they rejected me for being “too irish”
➛
Sep 14, 2016

we're all legacy

@tolar we're all legacy
➛
Sep 14, 2016

the mom was not vegan (+ fish, as the diet is described)...

@spongeworthy2 @katienotopoulos the mom was not vegan (+ fish, as the diet is described) and the mom reportedly misses cheese.
➛
Sep 14, 2016

i like when they go to daddy's work and it's basically...

@harrisj i like when they go to daddy's work and it's basically pointless
➛
Sep 14, 2016

Come for the gale-force hurricane of mother-love, stay for...

Come for the gale-force hurricane of mother-love, stay for the nuanced reported essay on medical epistemology. blog.longreads.com/...
➛
Sep 14, 2016

Oh my god this piece. Maria. https://twitter.com/mariabustil...

Oh my god this piece. Maria. twitter.com/...
➛
Sep 14, 2016

Inside Out is just The Avengers set in a kid's brain.

Inside Out is just The Avengers set in a kid's brain.
➛
Sep 14, 2016

Oh god what if Ookla isn't a company but rather a...

Oh god what if Ookla isn't a company but rather a malevolent force and we've all been reading Speedtest wrong for years.
➛
Sep 14, 2016

Ookla power is a terrible force that we must learn to...

Ookla power is a terrible force that we must learn to control if we are to survive. twitter.com/...
➛
Sep 14, 2016

we've already been using the open-sourced IP Free a lot, he...

@rustyk5 we've already been using the open-sourced IP Free a lot, he loves it but I hate it
➛
Sep 14, 2016

Frankly I should have read the RFC a lot more carefully...

Frankly I should have read the RFC a lot more carefully before implementing.
➛
Sep 14, 2016

As a protocol it's high latency, low bandwidth, and it...

As a protocol it's high latency, low bandwidth, and it drops about 99% of its packets. And thinks “TCP/IP” is hilarious when said out loud.
➛
Sep 14, 2016

Testing out our Kinternet connection....

Testing out our Kinternet connection. twitter.com/...
➛
Sep 13, 2016

Sometimes the old ways are best. What's the best legacy...

Sometimes the old ways are best. What's the best legacy programming language?
➛
Sep 13, 2016

cool I like being on lists

@theodoreross cool I like being on lists
➛
Sep 13, 2016

wait I'm honorably mentioned somewhere?

@theodoreross wait I'm honorably mentioned somewhere?
➛
Sep 13, 2016

Hey Jim! Thank you!

@jimray Hey Jim! Thank you!
➛
Sep 13, 2016

Thank you, Andrew! Much appreciated. We'll keep pushing.

@starsturncold Thank you, Andrew! Much appreciated. We'll keep pushing.
➛
Sep 13, 2016

this is good, it's just cats https://twitter.com/jackrusher/...

this is good, it's just cats twitter.com/...
➛
Sep 13, 2016

the judges are the worst

@jpotisch the judges are the worst
➛
Sep 13, 2016

yep they will be, takes about a week usually

@seldo yep they will be, takes about a week usually
➛
Sep 13, 2016

i'm spending fall muting accounts i should have already...

@patbits @laura_june i'm spending fall muting accounts i should have already muted
➛
Sep 13, 2016

The other headline options were “Let the Brightcove In” and...

The other headline options were “Let the Brightcove In” and “MidBright CoveBoy.”
➛
Sep 13, 2016

As a former little kid I'm an instant fan of any media that...

As a former little kid I'm an instant fan of any media that features giant sea creatures attacking big vehicles. twitter.com/...
➛
Sep 13, 2016

The sticky, nasty, grisly future of the media.

@richziade The sticky, nasty, grisly future of the media.
➛
Sep 13, 2016

thank you christian i like how the type is a mix of playful...

@TweetHumes @joshuatopolsky thank you christian i like how the type is a mix of playful italic and strong, brash sans serif
➛
Sep 13, 2016

If you want to understand the actual future of media listen...

If you want to understand the actual future of media listen to me + @richziade talk w/@Brightcove CEO David Mendels. soundcloud.com/...
➛
Sep 13, 2016

HR says roll it back Lee

@Lee_Ars HR says roll it back Lee
➛
Sep 13, 2016

When developing a fitness routine don't set unrealistic...

When developing a fitness routine don't set unrealistic goals. At first, you may want to simply walk the jewels, or lightly jog the jewels.
➛
Sep 13, 2016

see? Perfection

@goldman see? Perfection
➛
Sep 13, 2016

I love it I'm thinking of muting basically everything else

@heatheremerrick @teletexttimes I love it I'm thinking of muting basically everything else
➛
Sep 13, 2016

I hope they never find the HMS “Dick” Frosoff

@rustyk5 @harrisj I hope they never find the HMS “Dick” Frosoff
➛
Sep 13, 2016

I'm increasingly convinced this is the right amount of...

I'm increasingly convinced this is the right amount of news. twitter.com/...
➛
Sep 13, 2016

Let's all take a deep breath.

Let's all take a deep breath.
➛
Sep 13, 2016

Oh and affordances.

Oh and affordances.
➛
Sep 13, 2016

Filling out Board of Ed paperwork makes me want to write a...

Filling out Board of Ed paperwork makes me want to write a 10,000-word design essay on Medium that liberally uses the word “hierarchies.”
➛
Sep 13, 2016

Oh shit we forgot to talk Dipperz

Oh shit we forgot to talk Dipperz
➛
Sep 13, 2016

I went over and talked to @joshuatopolsky last night at 9pm...

I went over and talked to @joshuatopolsky last night at 9pm and we drank seltzer apparently it's already up m.soundcloud.com/...
➛
Sep 12, 2016

My kids will never be the same....

My kids will never be the same. twitter.com/...
➛
Sep 12, 2016

Jesus Christ get out of there

@Choire Jesus Christ get out of there
➛
Sep 12, 2016

In my defense it's been an eventful 24 years.

@ftrain In my defense it's been an eventful 24 years.
➛
Sep 12, 2016

Also I can find no Internet record of this monkey so maybe...

Also I can find no Internet record of this monkey so maybe I invented a Japanese monkey that impersonates a vomiting George Bush Sr.
➛
Sep 12, 2016

Anyway it's great to see you again, have you met Marie?...

Anyway it's great to see you again, have you met Marie? [Waits for you to introduce yourself to Marie.]
➛
Sep 12, 2016

My brain thinks it's way more important I keep that fact on...

My brain thinks it's way more important I keep that fact on file than that I remember your name after I've met you five times.
➛
Sep 12, 2016

I am sure I remember that after George Bush Sr. vomited...

I am sure I remember that after George Bush Sr. vomited (they called it “Bushu-suru”), a Japanese entertainer trained a monkey to fake-puke.
➛
Sep 12, 2016

listen we all have our roles

@jkottke listen we all have our roles
➛
Sep 12, 2016

oh you are the best thank you

@joshmillard oh you are the best thank you
➛
Sep 12, 2016

I was like, good gracious, tax is bodacious...

I was like, good gracious, tax is bodacious twitter.com/...
➛
Sep 12, 2016

everyone do your part https://twitter.com/KristyT/status/775...

everyone do your part twitter.com/...
➛
Sep 12, 2016

we fail at it mostly :(

@leahfinnegan we fail at it mostly :(
➛
Sep 12, 2016

the base unit of corporate communication is "COME RUIN YOUR...

@leahfinnegan the base unit of corporate communication is "COME RUIN YOUR OWN LIFE FOR THE CAUSE"
➛
Sep 12, 2016

you know what's weird is that it's ACTIVELY HARD to...

@leahfinnegan you know what's weird is that it's ACTIVELY HARD to communicate that our company trying to be the opposite of this
➛
Sep 12, 2016

It's sooo gooood. It's the #1 thing I think about as a...

@leahfinnegan It's sooo gooood. It's the #1 thing I think about as a manager of a company is how not to build that.
➛
Sep 12, 2016

same here! Not an interruption!

@kiddigit same here! Not an interruption!
➛
Sep 12, 2016

Since our Ditmas school is closed for Christian, Jewish,...

Since our Ditmas school is closed for Christian, Jewish, and Muslim holidays our childcare scenario is a disaster of biblical proportions.
➛
Sep 12, 2016

btw we can see you from our new office, pash pointed out...

@tomscocca btw we can see you from our new office, pash pointed out the blue sweater (?) you keep on your chair
➛
Sep 12, 2016

that's the thing the prequels are desperate for a dark...

@tomscocca that's the thing the prequels are desperate for a dark gritty reboot just to contextualize that stuff
➛
Sep 12, 2016

Alderaan was developing its own superweapon.

@harrisj Alderaan was developing its own superweapon.
➛
Sep 12, 2016

Third, the genuinely disturbing relationship between the...

Third, the genuinely disturbing relationship between the grieving rancor handler and Sy Snootles.
➛
Sep 12, 2016

First of all the Han/Luke/Leia thing gets turned into...

First of all the Han/Luke/Leia thing gets turned into something torrid. Second, Greedo isn't just shot first, but tortured.
➛
Sep 12, 2016

Did you folks ever think that one day they will do a dark,...

Did you folks ever think that one day they will do a dark, gritty reboot of Star Wars?
➛
Sep 11, 2016

A lot of it is here; poke around...

A lot of it is here; poke around broadcastify.com/... (I use a cheap app called Scanner)
➛
Sep 11, 2016

You can listen to select HAM radio repeaters on the...

You can listen to select HAM radio repeaters on the Internet if you're sleepy. I'm listening to a guy tell the story of Iridium satellites.
➛
Sep 11, 2016

i think this already happened

@droob @bn2b i think this already happened
➛
Sep 11, 2016

EXCELLENT subject

@droob EXCELLENT subject
➛
Sep 11, 2016

that'd be fine tbh we encourage guest posts

@maureenflaherty that'd be fine tbh we encourage guest posts
➛
Sep 11, 2016

what should i write about in the corp. newsletter tomorrow

what should i write about in the corp. newsletter tomorrow
➛
Sep 11, 2016

It takes a village to raise a question.

It takes a village to raise a question.
➛
Sep 11, 2016

right she always had sympathy and context for the bad...

@sippey @holgate right she always had sympathy and context for the bad things that are the inevitable side effect of the interesting things
➛
Sep 11, 2016

I'm also sorry she missed Breaking Bad/Mad Men/fan culture...

@sippey @holgate I'm also sorry she missed Breaking Bad/Mad Men/fan culture explosions, she saw things colliding
➛
Sep 11, 2016

her list of people she hated would either be, like, three...

@sippey @holgate her list of people she hated would either be, like, three people long, or ten hardbound volumes
➛
Sep 11, 2016

i just remember being incredibly confused about humans...

@sippey @holgate i just remember being incredibly confused about humans during much of that time
➛
Sep 11, 2016

hmm it's gotten worse—back then you just had one or two and...

@sippey @holgate hmm it's gotten worse—back then you just had one or two and you thought of them as crazies and they didn't call your work
➛
Sep 11, 2016

At one point Internet commenters yelled at her for grieving...

@sippey @holgate At one point Internet commenters yelled at her for grieving for her own friends instead of everyone collectively.
➛
Sep 11, 2016

still angry they told us to go shopping

still angry they told us to go shopping
➛
Sep 11, 2016

I always think of Leslie today because she lost so many...

@sippey I always think of Leslie today because she lost so many people that day and was also my lifeline when I was in Israel.
➛
Sep 11, 2016

mostly to see starlee but other talks too!

@jennschiffer mostly to see starlee but other talks too!
➛
Sep 11, 2016

i'm sorry i'm sorry i know it will be awesome and i wish i...

@jennschiffer i'm sorry i'm sorry i know it will be awesome and i wish i were there
➛
Sep 11, 2016

It's kind of nice to see a love blossom from a lifelong...

It's kind of nice to see a love blossom from a lifelong commitment to reproductive rights and chocolate labs mobile.nytimes.com/...
➛
Sep 10, 2016

Right, my god. Although there was a tradition of...

@textfiles Right, my god. Although there was a tradition of Hitler-mocking to build on, I guess.
➛
Sep 10, 2016

Congratulations to all my Twitter friends on your...

Congratulations to all my Twitter friends on your collective promotion to Hillary Clinton's campaign manager.
➛
Sep 10, 2016

the discussion was like, COULD YOU TELL? I was in college....

@leahfinnegan the discussion was like, COULD YOU TELL? I was in college. I remember thinking that was dumb and being mystified by the IRA
➛
Sep 10, 2016

This is an important historical document....

This is an important historical document. twitter.com/...
➛
Sep 10, 2016

It was marketed as having a wild story twist, like The...

@leahfinnegan It was marketed as having a wild story twist, like The Sixth Sense, and we are all ashamed.
➛
Sep 10, 2016

leaving this here just in case http://www.villageearth.org/a...

leaving this here just in case villageearth.org/...
➛
Sep 10, 2016

jesus christ i thought it was true for a minute

@bn2b @aedison jesus christ i thought it was true for a minute
➛
Sep 10, 2016

i mean this is the theme of the alchemist, which sort of...

@bn2b @aedison i mean this is the theme of the alchemist, which sort of proves your point
➛
Sep 10, 2016

i think you used to be able to buy it on microfiche with a...

@HappyHorseSkull @timoreilly @ev i think you used to be able to buy it on microfiche with a generator-powered reader
➛
Sep 10, 2016

As true now as it was when I wrote...

As true now as it was when I wrote it.
twitter.com/...
➛
Sep 10, 2016

If we don't have a world where Solange can dance to...

If we don't have a world where Solange can dance to Kraftwerk then we have no world worth keeping. twitter.com/...
➛
Sep 9, 2016

i've cut most of my subject matter way down? and i'm a dude...

@alexismallen i've cut most of my subject matter way down? and i'm a dude so I get far fewer batshit randos, just some. take fewer risks...
➛
Sep 9, 2016

the backchannel became the frontchannel, I guess. and new...

@alexismallen the backchannel became the frontchannel, I guess. and new norms. and just general poopyness.
➛
Sep 9, 2016

leah I don't think you are asking this with sincere intent

@leahfinnegan leah I don't think you are asking this with sincere intent
➛
Sep 9, 2016

“We're Apple. We enhance an iPhone user's smile every time...

@libovness “We're Apple. We enhance an iPhone user's smile every time they use force touch to take a picture.”
➛
Sep 9, 2016

equally important: you couldn't @ back

@rustyk5 equally important: you couldn't @ back
➛
Sep 9, 2016

To be fair it was only a six-month period.

To be fair it was only a six-month period.
➛
Sep 9, 2016

If something was problematic you'd get this email going,...

If something was problematic you'd get this email going, hey, you seem okay but you fucked up, and you thought about it for a week.
➛
Sep 9, 2016

God remember doing things on the Internet and making them...

God remember doing things on the Internet and making them as good as you could and people wouldn't just shit on everything all day.
➛
Sep 9, 2016

i know but the twins are giving each other news about their...

@kjhealy i know but the twins are giving each other news about their respective classrooms and chatting like nobody's business, it's stellar
➛
Sep 9, 2016

It was a different time.

It was a different time.
➛
Sep 9, 2016

I wish I were at what may be the last @xoxo ever, but I...

I wish I were at what may be the last @xoxo ever, but I would have missed the start of kindergarten. Safe travels.
➛
Sep 7, 2016

i just checked and this is not the case on SWISSPERS COTTON...

@fireland i just checked and this is not the case on SWISSPERS COTTON SWABS brand
➛
Sep 7, 2016

I will not tweet. Tweets are the time-killer. I will face...

I will not tweet. Tweets are the time-killer. I will face my email. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. Only I will remain.
➛
Sep 7, 2016

yes, i mean—they manage state, really, atop chat...

@entropymedia yes, i mean—they manage state, really, atop chat interfaces. neither good nor bad but possibly temporary.
➛
Sep 7, 2016

i know i listened to them all going home last night...

@derektmead i know i listened to them all going home last night they....rule
➛
Sep 6, 2016

based on half of one song this band is great

@inthefade based on half of one song this band is great
➛
Sep 6, 2016

Shit they're kinda great https://open.spotify.com/track/3niz...

Shit they're kinda great open.spotify.com/...
➛
Sep 6, 2016

https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/773287402991386624/photo/1

twitter.com/...
➛
Sep 6, 2016

Not a bad deal considering Wednesday is just half off well...

Not a bad deal considering Wednesday is just half off well drinks. twitter.com/...
➛
Sep 6, 2016

cool kid https://www.fastcompany.com/3063265/how-to-be-a-suc...

cool kid fastcompany.com/...
➛
Sep 6, 2016

Uber Chop’t. https://soundcloud.com/postlighttrackchanges/wh...

Uber Chop’t. soundcloud.com/...
➛
Sep 5, 2016

i've stopped checking polls because i have no power to...

i've stopped checking polls because i have no power to change them
➛
Sep 5, 2016

the thing where the kid tells you they hope you don't die...

the thing where the kid tells you they hope you don't die really messes with your head
➛
Sep 5, 2016

I just googled "epic congressional tweetstorm" and there...

@bn2b I just googled "epic congressional tweetstorm" and there are dozens of articles
➛
Sep 5, 2016

It's all fun when politicians use memes but there are gonna...

It's all fun when politicians use memes but there are gonna be bad consequences and we're not prepared.
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Sep 5, 2016

i can't wait until internet culture hits nation-state level...

i can't wait until internet culture hits nation-state level and we are treated to "0/a few words on our nuclear arms policy"
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Sep 5, 2016

youuuu maddddddeeee itttttt!

@Jo_Livingstone youuuu maddddddeeee itttttt!
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Sep 3, 2016

great wikipedia page https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Glossary_...

great wikipedia page en.wikipedia.org/...
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Sep 3, 2016

shame not to do Kristallmeth tho

@leahfinnegan shame not to do Kristallmeth tho
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Sep 3, 2016

toph toph tophtophtoph t o p h toph

@tophtucker toph

toph

tophtophtoph

t o p h

toph
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Sep 3, 2016

us history really wants to be https://twitter.com/ftrain/sta...

@patbits us history really wants to be twitter.com/...
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Sep 3, 2016

“Wait,” you yearn to @ me, “wouldn't that be year ZERO?”...

“Wait,” you yearn to @ me, “wouldn't that be year ZERO?” Friend, I would never post a joke so good without research. en.wikipedia.org/...
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Sep 3, 2016

Do you think Joseph and Mary were fleeing Herod's wrath...

Do you think Joseph and Mary were fleeing Herod's wrath into Egypt with the baby Jesus and said to themselves, “Man, screw 1 A.D.?”
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Sep 3, 2016

it's all the same big mess

@patbits it's all the same big mess
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Sep 3, 2016

https://www.gq.com/story/inside-federal-bureau-of-way-too-ma...

gq.com/...
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Sep 3, 2016

http://www.nytimes.com/2016/09/04/opinion/sunday/how-to-tell...

nytimes.com/...
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Sep 3, 2016

I want WebAssembly to get here so that we can have public...

@amyhoy @gortok @thomasfuchs I want WebAssembly to get here so that we can have public infighting over more than one crappy language
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Sep 2, 2016

I just knew I'd regret that and it would become something...

@Schwartzesque I just knew I'd regret that and it would become something I'd have to defend
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Sep 2, 2016

I had a good tweetstorm lined up but I'm listening to...

I had a good tweetstorm lined up but I'm listening to Beaster instead.
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Sep 2, 2016

stop this before it's too late

@leahfinnegan stop this before it's too late
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Sep 2, 2016

Wow this cover is gooooood. https://twitter.com/nymag/status...

Wow this cover is gooooood. twitter.com/...
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Sep 2, 2016

I want to manage @PostlightAgency entirely by tongue...

I want to manage @PostlightAgency entirely by tongue twister. “Soft skills kill scope creep.” Say it ten times fast then hire accordingly!
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Sep 2, 2016

Movie idea: Murder mystery at a remote mental asylum where...

Movie idea: Murder mystery at a remote mental asylum where everyone dresses well and smiles. SHUTTERSTOCK ISLAND. twitter.com/...
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Sep 1, 2016

it spreads out past the shallows of irony and empathy and...

@michelledean it spreads out past the shallows of irony and empathy and bobs there in the deepest ocean of humanity, ready to spring a leak
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Sep 1, 2016

the punishment is so much worse than the crime

@michelledean the punishment is so much worse than the crime
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Sep 1, 2016

I...use carousels

@seldo I...use carousels
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Sep 1, 2016

no you're grilled cheese guy

@_grendan no you're grilled cheese guy
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Sep 1, 2016

wow that hot pocket kid was the future...

wow that hot pocket kid was the future fusion.net/...
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Sep 1, 2016

Kevin you wrote that at 729 am

@kevboh Kevin you wrote that at 729 am
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Aug 31, 2016

it's reaaaaaal tricky, which makes it all the more shitty...

@kzwa it's reaaaaaal tricky, which makes it all the more shitty when it happens :(
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Aug 31, 2016

I am not allowed to learn his Twitter handle because of...

I am not allowed to learn his Twitter handle because of past incidents.
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Aug 31, 2016

My wife works in construction as a project manager and a...

My wife works in construction as a project manager and a client today asked her to get him a glass of water.
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Aug 31, 2016

my wife made me watch this

@droob my wife made me watch this
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