Ftrain, by Paul Ford

May 2015

May 31, 2015

yes! tufte does use them a lot. got it.

@kjhealy yes! tufte does use them a lot. got it.
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May 31, 2015

what is the name of the chart where there are two columns...

what is the name of the chart where there are two columns of things (states, exports) and crossing lines connecting them
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May 31, 2015

i am a data visualization expert...

i am a data visualization expert twitter.com/...
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May 30, 2015

i can kind of see you going cyc tho, or pinger

@rustyk5 i can kind of see you going cyc tho, or pinger
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May 29, 2015

i guess we could have predicted that the capitalism endgame...

@mmasnick @therealfitz i guess we could have predicted that the capitalism endgame wouldn't be leisure but sim-u-work
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May 29, 2015

there is a whole economy of simulated labor

@suchwinston there is a whole economy of simulated labor
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May 29, 2015

we've been faking the wrong things

@rustyk5 we've been faking the wrong things
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May 29, 2015

what if tumblr was just a vehicle for branded content...

what if tumblr was just a vehicle for branded content promoting digital tv shows? what if facebook was for only for ads? what if linkedin?
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May 29, 2015

did you really quit the times? now you'll always wonder.

@harrisj did you really quit the times? now you'll always wonder.
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May 29, 2015

it's so much sadder too

@max_read it's so much sadder too
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May 29, 2015

if people are optimistic, engaged, learning new skills, and...

if people are optimistic, engaged, learning new skills, and glad to be there, it's entirely possible the company is fake this is not irony
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May 29, 2015

i'm afraid to look out the window in case nothing is there

@mgrnbrg i'm afraid to look out the window in case nothing is there
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May 29, 2015

what if all the companies are fake

what if all the companies are fake
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May 29, 2015

The Office meets The Matrix

The Office meets The Matrix
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May 29, 2015

“Some of the faux companies even hold strikes.”

“Some of the faux companies even hold strikes.”
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May 29, 2015

“They also receive virtual salaries to spend within the...

“They also receive virtual salaries to spend within the make-believe economy.” nytimes.com/...
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May 29, 2015

i mean this is it right this is how it ends

@harrisj i mean this is it right this is how it ends
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May 29, 2015

oh god oh god oh god http://www.nytimes.com/2015/05/31/busin...

oh god oh god oh god nytimes.com/...
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May 29, 2015

No matter what my self-conception, I have a suspicion I'd...

No matter what my self-conception, I have a suspicion I'd enjoy Pitch Perfect II.
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May 28, 2015

i know it seems unlikely, almost shocking, but the same...

@rustyk5 i know it seems unlikely, almost shocking, but the same people who like collecting radio frequencies also like building websites
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May 28, 2015

miss u, winter

miss u, winter
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May 28, 2015

Nicki Minaj Bar Mitzvah works well descriptively, like,...

Nicki Minaj Bar Mitzvah works well descriptively, like, this is a real NMBM situation we got right here.
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May 28, 2015

taxi medallions paid for that nicki minaj bar mitzvah are...

@anildash @richziade @BilldeBlasio taxi medallions paid for that nicki minaj bar mitzvah are we really ready to give that up?
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May 28, 2015

rich what have you done

@richziade rich what have you done
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May 27, 2015

Funeral Evites.

Funeral Evites.
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May 27, 2015

people need to chill out it was just a $30 hot dog

@leahfinnegan people need to chill out it was just a $30 hot dog
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May 27, 2015

yeah i mean this, it is...substantive if terrible

@thebitterstweet yeah i mean this, it is...substantive if terrible
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May 27, 2015

where do I begin? no i mean literally i can't select the...

@thebitterstweet where do I begin? no i mean literally i can't select the beginning of the article for some reason.
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May 27, 2015

it turns out i have strong feelings about adobe-based...

it turns out i have strong feelings about adobe-based production workflow management software
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May 27, 2015

all of the acronyms https://twitter.com/Balisage/status/6036...

all of the acronyms twitter.com/...
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May 27, 2015

I mean when birds seek to destroy pig infrastructure who...

I mean when birds seek to destroy pig infrastructure who really wins? Slingshot makers.
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May 27, 2015

What if it's two hours of bird/pig truth and reconciliation...

What if it's two hours of bird/pig truth and reconciliation in the hope of a better future?
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May 27, 2015

I mean it has to be basically!

@rustyk5 @bn2b I mean it has to be basically!
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May 27, 2015

THEY KILLED MY FAMILY. [scene of bird slaughter at hooves...

THEY KILLED MY FAMILY. [scene of bird slaughter at hooves of pigs] [pan up to reveal slingshot] THE PIGS...WILL PAY. —Angry Birds movie 2016
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May 27, 2015

I'm thinking about the coming Angry Birds movie since @bn2b...

I'm thinking about the coming Angry Birds movie since @bn2b mentioned it. Like what if it's just, extreme pig/bird violence for two hours.
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May 27, 2015

One thing I forgot about giant companies is the sensation...

One thing I forgot about giant companies is the sensation when you leave the office and touch your neck but nothing is there—ghost lanyard.
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May 27, 2015

Excellent and deeply-felt context by @textfiles for...

Excellent and deeply-felt context by @textfiles for understanding the MAME emulation system ascii.textfiles.com/...
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May 26, 2015

I worked open-plan today which I haven't done in a while....

I worked open-plan today which I haven't done in a while. Due to one headphone jack slippage I had a mild disruptive Quadron leak. B-/C+.
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May 26, 2015

at one pt i went on all 4s and let the children climb up to...

@laura_june @Choire at one pt i went on all 4s and let the children climb up to my back then jump off onto pillows so i could keep reading
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May 26, 2015

i needed 800 pages of pure mindscrubbing in between drafts...

@laura_june @Choire i needed 800 pages of pure mindscrubbing in between drafts and i got it
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May 26, 2015

people are being fussy about the last third of the book but...

@Choire people are being fussy about the last third of the book but it totally has giant orbiting cities repairing a ruined earth so
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May 26, 2015

OH MY FUCKING GOD

@Choire OH
MY
FUCKING
GOD
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May 26, 2015

what are skids

@bn2b what are skids
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May 26, 2015

It was the result of a secret government program known only...

@bn2b It was the result of a secret government program known only as EYELINER ULTRA. Today, only some goths remain.
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May 26, 2015

now i want to go get coffee and everyone is going to assume...

now i want to go get coffee and everyone is going to assume it's to cry GOOD
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May 26, 2015

what if there are goths in our stairwells

what if there are goths in our stairwells
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May 26, 2015

A mole sent me all the secret crying spots in this...

A mole sent me all the secret crying spots in this building, it's wonderful except I'm afraid of what I'll find. What if it's Morrissey?
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May 26, 2015

but all the agua fresca you can drink

@aaronrutkoff but all the agua fresca you can drink
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May 26, 2015

my children are so ahead of the game

@laura_june my children are so ahead of the game
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May 26, 2015

wow defense contracting has changed

@julieedow wow defense contracting has changed
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May 26, 2015

No but the EXECUTIVE crying nooks.

@iboudway No but the EXECUTIVE crying nooks.
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May 26, 2015

Not if they are used to fill the enormous aquariums.

@jwherrman Not if they are used to fill the enormous aquariums.
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May 26, 2015

One good thing about being overweight is that no one can...

One good thing about being overweight is that no one can see your laptop screen.
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May 26, 2015

c.f. https://medium.com/message/writing-on-medium-88a5e99d86...

c.f. medium.com/...
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May 26, 2015

I mean...I don't think they are! Like, I asked about my...

@rustyk5 I mean...I don't think they are! Like, I asked about my thing and they're like, steady on.
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May 26, 2015

Also right now today I'm working in a giant open-plan...

Also right now today I'm working in a giant open-plan office and I keep wondering, where are the crying nooks?
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May 26, 2015

i know! it is very confusing.

@palinode i know! it is very confusing.
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May 26, 2015

i kept meaning to tweet that all weekend and tit was like...

@rustyk5 i kept meaning to tweet that all weekend and tit was like the string around my finger
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May 26, 2015

Oh and to be clear it did that two years ago.

Oh and to be clear it did that two years ago.
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May 26, 2015

I have some news about Medium: Medium gave me a brief...

I have some news about Medium: Medium gave me a brief contract with clear rights, pays me when I write, and lets me write about ANYTHING.
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May 26, 2015

actually it's neither of those things but point taken

@leahfinnegan actually it's neither of those things but point taken
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May 26, 2015

what if a magazine gave you unlimited paul ford

@leahfinnegan what if a magazine gave you unlimited paul ford
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May 26, 2015

No one should write about programming; it's impossible....

No one should write about programming; it's impossible. twitter.com/...
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May 25, 2015

Maybe instead of saying “make it so easy that your mom can...

Maybe instead of saying “make it so easy that your mom can use it,” say “make it so easy that a senior executive can use it.”
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May 25, 2015

wow that url obliterated twitter's regexp

@ddt wow that url obliterated twitter's regexp
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May 25, 2015

“The reality has been more complex” is how the New York...

“The reality has been more complex” is how the New York Times says “BOHICA.”
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May 25, 2015

I do this too! It's the devil's bargain. But it makes me...

@kylemcauley I do this too! It's the devil's bargain. But it makes me think what else could you use the URL bar for?
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May 25, 2015

omg you're totally right

@LorenDavie omg you're totally right
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May 25, 2015

Any sufficiently advanced object model is indistinguishable...

Any sufficiently advanced object model is indistinguishable from garbage.
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May 25, 2015

I have, myself, paused Band of Brothers to buy electronic...

@rustyk5 I have, myself, paused Band of Brothers to buy electronic equipment.
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May 25, 2015

i basically just hit undo until i'm back to a blank page...

@jamiekeiles i basically just hit undo until i'm back to a blank page then start over
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May 25, 2015

I mean, yes, but also I'd argue it's good to draw a...

@merveille I mean, yes, but also I'd argue it's good to draw a semantic distinction between workaround and solution.
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May 25, 2015

u shouldn't have to know weird sekrits to use mass...

@poetryforsupper @bennyfactor u shouldn't have to know weird sekrits to use mass consumer-produced things tho
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May 25, 2015

didja get the NooElec R820T2 SDR &DVB-GT NESDR Mini 2?...

@rustyk5 didja get the NooElec R820T2 SDR &DVB-GT NESDR Mini 2? well welcome to a world of PURE IMAGINATION
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May 25, 2015

omg ⌥_(ツ)_/¯

@kjhealy omg ⌥_(ツ)_/¯
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May 25, 2015

Has there ever been a bigger “we UX people completely give...

Has there ever been a bigger “we UX people completely give up” than the “OPTION key” symbol? ⌥⌥⌥ (Is it an oblique Mac happy face?)
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May 25, 2015

“Find the COMMAND key. Now find the OPTION key. Now the...

“Find the COMMAND key. Now find the OPTION key. Now the SHIFT key. Hold those down simultaneously and press V.” —Nerds
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May 25, 2015

srsly tho that is moonspeak to humans, it says BACKWARDS...

@bennyfactor srsly tho that is moonspeak to humans, it says BACKWARDS ROBOT S, UP ARROW, FLOWER THINGY, V
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May 25, 2015

Right but then I have to remember how to paste formatted...

@Jermolene Right but then I have to remember how to paste formatted which I also sometimes really want.
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May 25, 2015

Yep but paste-at-a-time.

@blidt Yep but paste-at-a-time.
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May 25, 2015

Keyboard commands are lore, not interface.

Keyboard commands are lore, not interface.
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May 25, 2015

YESMODES

YESMODES
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May 25, 2015

Every Office-style software program should have a "paste...

Every Office-style software program should have a "paste only as flat text" button that can be ON or OFF. twitter.com/...
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May 25, 2015

I just told a child, “you can make your own TV show in your...

I just told a child, “you can make your own TV show in your heart.”
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May 23, 2015

The new Neal Stephenson is not for everyone but it's pure...

The new Neal Stephenson is not for everyone but it's pure joy for fans of multiple bolide impacts.
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May 23, 2015

I think a lot of news should prob just be delivered in...

@leahfinnegan I think a lot of news should prob just be delivered in playlist form
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May 23, 2015

Check out my maunderings

Check out my maunderings
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May 23, 2015

I just inspiringly wandered to buy Coors Light.

I just inspiringly wandered to buy Coors Light.
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May 23, 2015

Get inspired by my wanderings https://twitter.com/tnr/statu...

Get inspired by my wanderings twitter.com/...
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May 23, 2015

Man technology sure turns people into self-entitled angry...

Man technology sure turns people into self-entitled angry asshole narcissists. I'm talking about cars, though.
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May 22, 2015

“GitHub didn’t invent version control by a long shit.” is a...

“GitHub didn’t invent version control by a long shit.” is a typo I just found.
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May 22, 2015

this whole conversation was basically me trolling you

@bn2b @octothorpe this whole conversation was basically me trolling you
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May 22, 2015

:thumbsupslownod:

@inthefade :thumbsupslownod:
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May 22, 2015

Open question: Which prog rock band is best to listen to...

Open question: Which prog rock band is best to listen to when you are weaving shit into your beard?
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May 22, 2015

When I started programming it was like I was trapped inside...

When I started programming it was like I was trapped inside a weird invisible glass box, but I learned I was just using the wrong mime type.
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May 22, 2015

guys thanks for letting me know there are other word...

guys thanks for letting me know there are other word processors besides msword or as i like to call it gnu/msword
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May 22, 2015

genie i'm free of horizontal lines in macword

genie i'm free of horizontal lines in macword
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May 22, 2015

In MacWord get rid of a horiz line: Select the line, Format...

In MacWord get rid of a horiz line: Select the line, Format > Borders and Shading, select None, OKAY. tx @FurbleScout twitter.com/...
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May 22, 2015

maybe not on a mac :/

@FurbleScout maybe not on a mac :/
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May 22, 2015

maybe we can have them back if we wish hard enough

@maureenflaherty maybe we can have them back if we wish hard enough
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May 22, 2015

nothing on earth is more resistant to change than a...

nothing on earth is more resistant to change than a horizontal dividing line in msword
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May 22, 2015

finally https://medium.com/technology-musings/the-annotated-...

finally medium.com/...
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May 21, 2015

how many times have you erased your account now

@leahfinnegan how many times have you erased your account now
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May 21, 2015

probably expired

@reppep probably expired
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May 21, 2015

"terrible" might be a leeeeetle strong here

@helveticade "terrible" might be a leeeeetle strong here
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May 21, 2015

just out of editorial curiosity i diffed my edit of "how to...

just out of editorial curiosity i diffed my edit of "how to be polite" with the reader's digest version diffchecker.com/...
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May 21, 2015

the sequel is called the male glaze it's about donuts

@leahfinnegan the sequel is called the male glaze it's about donuts
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May 21, 2015

When people show affection like this I go, WAIT, DO I HAVE...

@textfiles When people show affection like this I go, WAIT, DO I HAVE A TERRIBLE DARK SECRET? But my basement family says I'm nice.
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May 21, 2015

we could talk about binary packing algorithms and the...

@textfiles we could talk about binary packing algorithms and the future of in-browser everything, it would be very soothing
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May 21, 2015

i'm a terrible person

@nypl_labs i'm a terrible person
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May 21, 2015

i mean it's doesn't link all human knowledge together but...

i mean it's doesn't link all human knowledge together but look at this CONTENT projects.propublica.org/...
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May 21, 2015

“Never will you want something more than to untangle the...

“Never will you want something more than to untangle the necklace.” — @page88 #1675--share-71-136" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.com/message/how-to-untangle-a-necklace-dcc418e026af?source=tw-168dab556633-1432217509035#1675--share-71-136 twitter.com/...
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May 21, 2015

hahahahahaahhahaahsaiphg'ewpihr'pewihrgp'hewr

@fidothe hahahahahaahhahaahsaiphg'ewpihr'pewihrgp'hewr
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May 21, 2015

I mean its got space shit instead of sailing ships so I'm...

@rustyk5 @Choire I mean its got space shit instead of sailing ships so I'm in.
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May 20, 2015

“My new cloud mostly works.” http://www.newrepublic.com/arti...

“My new cloud mostly works.” newrepublic.com/...
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May 20, 2015

the desperate need to brag smashes into the charming desire...

@AnnaHolmes the desperate need to brag smashes into the charming desire not to make others jealous, aka the narcissist's dilemma
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May 20, 2015

This is cool. https://twitter.com/brianoberkirch/status/6011...

This is cool. twitter.com/...
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May 20, 2015

even crab rangoon

@jesselamb even crab rangoon
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May 20, 2015

Dramatic staged reenactment of syrupy tot dumpling...

Dramatic staged reenactment of syrupy tot dumpling affections instagram.com/...
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May 20, 2015

I did EVERYTHING wrong

@kjhealy I did EVERYTHING wrong
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May 20, 2015

oh no its worse my primary income is as a freelance writer...

@kjhealy oh no its worse my primary income is as a freelance writer and I'm the main income
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May 20, 2015

what is going outside

what is going outside
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May 20, 2015

We are raising our children to acknowledge, respect, and...

We are raising our children to acknowledge, respect, and celebrate ALL dumplings.
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May 20, 2015

3yo twin A: "you are my dim sum." 3yo twin B: "you are my...

3yo twin A: "you are my dim sum."
3yo twin B: "you are my pelmeni." #centralbk
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May 20, 2015

this is great https://medium.com/@johndevore/i-quit-drinking...

this is great @johndevore/i-quit-drinking-5-years-ago-today-and-i-ve-been-insufferable-ever-since-b7a72cfb3b1f" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.com/@johndevore/i-quit-drinking-5-years-ago-today-and-i-ve-been-insufferable-ever-since-b7a72cfb3b1f
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May 20, 2015

http://www.theonion.com/article/study-average-father-thinks-...

theonion.com/...
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May 20, 2015

my computer is 5000 degrees rn

@laura_june my computer is 5000 degrees rn
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May 20, 2015

how do people feel when you just end a tweet with a comma,

how do people feel when you just end a tweet with a comma,
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May 20, 2015

yeah the medium comments functionality on that post is...

@krylon yeah the medium comments functionality on that post is probably not the best place to state that particular case
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May 20, 2015

you are naming your hard drive wrong...

you are naming your hard drive wrong medium.com/...
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May 20, 2015

It's good advice!

@tcarmody It's good advice!
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May 20, 2015

I just sometimes wish they could acknowledge that they ARE...

@krylon I just sometimes wish they could acknowledge that they ARE welcomed? Anyway nothing much has happened, I'm just waiting.
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May 20, 2015

I understand completely. I kind of love it though, people...

@krylon I understand completely. I kind of love it though, people are welcome to criticize me all they want.
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May 20, 2015

my essay is this dog rn https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/60...

my essay is this dog rn twitter.com/...
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May 20, 2015

Yesterday someone pointed out how rare it is for someone...

Yesterday someone pointed out how rare it is for someone outside of poetry to write about poetry. Today I find out why.
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May 20, 2015

Approve all the comments and let god sort them out.

Approve all the comments and let god sort them out.
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May 19, 2015

also nybr has an amazing and lovingly-tended website that...

@rustyk5 @cwarzel also nybr has an amazing and lovingly-tended website that has worked beautifully for YEARS
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May 19, 2015

So @garychou teaches a great class at @svaixd and he gave a...

So @garychou teaches a great class at @svaixd and he gave a great commencement speech, too @garychou/the-thesis-after-your-thesis-62c47d3a4c0a" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.com/@garychou/the-thesis-after-your-thesis-62c47d3a4c0a
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May 19, 2015

No I know that was what I thought of immediately too.

@rustyk5 @ProPublica No I know that was what I thought of immediately too.
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May 19, 2015

oh god this is the first of three

@rustyk5 oh god this is the first of three
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May 19, 2015

also he proposes that @propublica implement the memex

@rustyk5 also he proposes that @propublica implement the memex
➛
May 19, 2015

I can Nazi the resemblance

@leahfinnegan I can Nazi the resemblance
➛
May 19, 2015

“there are plenty of entertaining nuggets in the book”...

“there are plenty of entertaining nuggets in the book” theguardian.com/... it is a book about poop
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May 19, 2015

less said about that the better

@AGoldmund less said about that the better
➛
May 19, 2015

I hope that when it comes to Genesis listening you can...

@AGoldmund I hope that when it comes to Genesis listening you can “Turn It On Again” instead of “Throwing it all away.”
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May 19, 2015

You appear to be living in a “land of confusion” here....

@AGoldmund You appear to be living in a “land of confusion” here. “That's all.”
➛
May 19, 2015

venmo me a dollar and i will give you 20% of my cats'...

@bn2b venmo me a dollar and i will give you 20% of my cats' startup
➛
May 19, 2015

jesus christ they have a lot of hits BUT they are all Cars...

@AGoldmund jesus christ they have a lot of hits BUT they are all Cars hits
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May 19, 2015

I'm glad I could “Shake it up” for you

@AGoldmund I'm glad I could “Shake it up” for you
➛
May 19, 2015

“Don't go to Pieces,” maybe you need to “Drive” to the...

@AGoldmund “Don't go to Pieces,” maybe you need to “Drive” to the store and pick up a copy of “Duke” and let the “Good Times Roll.”
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May 19, 2015

one of those novelty “in case of emergency break glass”...

one of those novelty “in case of emergency break glass” things but with toast
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May 19, 2015

wow cutting carbs sux amirite 😖😖😖 [rapid hulk breathing]...

wow cutting carbs sux amirite 😖😖😖 [rapid hulk breathing] WIWOPHRGHIP"""GHIPU(_ [rips door off fridge and beats self unconscious with it]
➛
May 19, 2015

I mean little charts are so good

@abackstrom I mean little charts are so good
➛
May 19, 2015

guys i am an excellent poet it's just that my chosen form...

@egabbert @accommodatingly @anindita guys i am an excellent poet it's just that my chosen form is prose about machines
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May 19, 2015

nono i grew up in it and know how weird it seems when...

@egabbert @anindita nono i grew up in it and know how weird it seems when people stumble into the reading looking for home repair books
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May 19, 2015

[sliding in helllOOOO] i mean for me it's all about...

@anindita @egabbert [sliding in helllOOOO] i mean for me it's all about composition process and form, i can't even with interpretation
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May 19, 2015

The Spotify/Sony contract hooooooo doggies:...

The Spotify/Sony contract hooooooo doggies: theverge.com/...
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May 19, 2015

here you go https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yyj5GuXuaos

here you go youtube.com/...
➛
May 19, 2015

You could have a library with teensy tiny books.

@SteveBurnsAlive You could have a library with teensy tiny books.
➛
May 19, 2015

Imagine all the time you could spend customizing your truck.

@SteveBurnsAlive Imagine all the time you could spend customizing your truck.
➛
May 19, 2015

I want to live in a truck http://boingboing.net/2015/05/19/h...

I want to live in a truck boingboing.net/...
➛
May 19, 2015

I would LURVE that

@michelet I would LURVE that
➛
May 19, 2015

But this is soooooooo Internet. Although the scope of focus...

@michelet But this is soooooooo Internet. Although the scope of focus (i.e. they went after art world, this is about poetry) is similar. HMM
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May 19, 2015

“(even Anonymous has a name)” — @ftrain...

“(even Anonymous has a name)” — @ftrain #0817--share-367-394" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.com/message/a-no-to-poem-6f5d7aea9f15?source=tw-168dab556633-1432039695724#0817--share-367-394 twitter.com/...
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May 19, 2015

i mean self-aware networks of intestinal nanobots with...

@kthread i mean self-aware networks of intestinal nanobots with retro-ironic tumblrs is not entirely different from the current scene
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May 19, 2015

right because their entire room will be smeared with...

@kthread right because their entire room will be smeared with CompuGel.
➛
May 19, 2015

I will lock them in the bedroom and take away their...

@kthread I will lock them in the bedroom and take away their manifestos.
➛
May 19, 2015

“I doubt that 85 years will eradicate the cultural need for...

“I doubt that 85 years will eradicate the cultural need for feminism, activism, or poetry.” #37da--share-290-390" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.com/message/a-no-to-poem-6f5d7aea9f15?source=tw-168dab556633-1432039005356#37da--share-290-390
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May 19, 2015

“The poem is 3,712 words of free verse, an average of 14...

“The poem is 3,712 words of free verse, an average of 14 words per line.” — @ftrain #8a84--share-200-271" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.com/message/a-no-to-poem-6f5d7aea9f15?source=tw-168dab556633-1432038764664#8a84--share-200-271 twitter.com/...
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May 19, 2015

I wrote for The Message today about a very interesting...

I wrote for The Message today about a very interesting collectively-written poem that appeared a few weeks ago: medium.com/...
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May 18, 2015

i hav dremes ware im been chaste

i hav dremes ware im been chaste
➛
May 18, 2015

One of the healthiest ways I've found to handle stress is...

One of the healthiest ways I've found to handle stress is to flutter your hands compulsively while saying the words “I hate all cubes.”
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May 18, 2015

i m a disatser

i m a disatser
➛
May 18, 2015

I'm here for you Greg.

@gregorg I'm here for you Greg.
➛
May 18, 2015

Imagine the guest-host nightmare that will be the final...

Imagine the guest-host nightmare that will be the final season of SNL.
➛
May 18, 2015

no you support my kickstarter

@leahfinnegan no you support my kickstarter
➛
May 18, 2015

YES this is how PR people sometimes write what in God's name

@piercegleeson YES this is how PR people sometimes write what in God's name
➛
May 18, 2015

you. know. what. makes. things. really. horrible. to. read?

you. know. what. makes. things. really. horrible. to. read?
➛
May 18, 2015

spotistalking. is. not. okay.

@cwarzel spotistalking. is. not. okay.
➛
May 18, 2015

stop upskirting me charlie

@cwarzel stop upskirting me charlie
➛
May 18, 2015

GLENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN! I think about that conversation...

@glenn_mcdonald GLENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN! I think about that conversation a lot since I learned Clojure!
➛
May 18, 2015

you know who else loved hitler

@mattbuchanan you know who else loved hitler
➛
May 18, 2015

Hah. I'll take the 5% earworm rate!

@jackrusher Hah. I'll take the 5% earworm rate!
➛
May 18, 2015

get that meaning

get that meaning
➛
May 18, 2015

This http://musicmachinery.com/ blog is super-good too.

This musicmachinery.com blog is super-good too.
➛
May 18, 2015

Here's the playlist: https://open.spotify.com/user/thesounds...

Here's the playlist: open.spotify.com/...
➛
May 18, 2015

I listen to an embarrassing number of “what's new”...

I listen to an embarrassing number of “what's new” playlists and that Needle playlist has a great hit-to-dud ratio.
➛
May 18, 2015

After I wrote about Spotify for @tnr I discovered this...

After I wrote about Spotify for @tnr I discovered this engineer's blog; he's done great work finding “emerging music” furia.com
➛
May 18, 2015

Reading “This is what it's like to be charged by a hippo”...

Reading “This is what it's like to be charged by a hippo” on Medium my 1st thought was “Stripe is branching out.” @blprnt/this-is-what-it-is-like-to-be-charged-by-a-hippopotamus-aa3b7bf320ef" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.com/@blprnt/this-is-what-it-is-like-to-be-charged-by-a-hippopotamus-aa3b7bf320ef
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May 18, 2015

Oh I wonder what @blprnt is up to oh he's in Angola doing...

Oh I wonder what @blprnt is up to oh he's in Angola doing open hippo data (and a lot more) @blprnt/this-is-what-it-is-like-to-be-charged-by-a-hippopotamus-aa3b7bf320ef" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.com/@blprnt/this-is-what-it-is-like-to-be-charged-by-a-hippopotamus-aa3b7bf320ef
➛
May 18, 2015

According to their FAQ, it's just related searches--but I...

@osulop According to their FAQ, it's just related searches--but I just discovered furia.com which shows how they use it.
➛
May 18, 2015

It's a great way to keep in touch and judge your friends.

@maura It's a great way to keep in touch and judge your friends.
➛
May 17, 2015

so all these years I've known you, you're actually a...

@leahfinnegan so all these years I've known you, you're actually a princess?
➛
May 17, 2015

maybe there's a union discount

@leahfinnegan maybe there's a union discount
➛
May 17, 2015

if you work it right they just send you stuff

@leahfinnegan if you work it right they just send you stuff
➛
May 17, 2015

What if at the end of the movie Don jumps out a window but...

@rustyk5 What if at the end of the movie Don jumps out a window but instead of falling he flies and his daughter looks up and smiles CUEJAZZ
➛
May 17, 2015

You know who else didn't care about the conclusion to Mad...

@rustyk5 You know who else didn't care about the conclusion to Mad Men?
➛
May 17, 2015

patriarchal technocracy has been good to me

@leahfinnegan patriarchal technocracy has been good to me
➛
May 17, 2015

its fine except for the robot freegan potlucks

@leahfinnegan its fine except for the robot freegan potlucks
➛
May 17, 2015

all my robot ladies come out as intersectional feminists...

@leahfinnegan all my robot ladies come out as intersectional feminists and start collectives
➛
May 17, 2015

I have watched this video twenty times...

I have watched this video twenty times youtu.be/...
➛
May 17, 2015

is it like all fancy or can he get spicy maki combo I guess...

@leahfinnegan is it like all fancy or can he get spicy maki combo I guess I need to see this moviw
➛
May 17, 2015

she makes sushi? That would save me like $50/week

@leahfinnegan she makes sushi? That would save me like $50/week
➛
May 17, 2015

maybe the 2020s will be the 80s we have been waiting for?

@Choire maybe the 2020s will be the 80s we have been waiting for?
➛
May 17, 2015

I was thinking that the letterset 1890s artisinal thing was...

@Choire I was thinking that the letterset 1890s artisinal thing was very 70s too.
➛
May 17, 2015

To be clear I have nothing against beards I'm just amazed...

To be clear I have nothing against beards I'm just amazed they are still here.
➛
May 17, 2015

My father was born in 1932 and he told me in the late 1980s...

My father was born in 1932 and he told me in the late 1980s that sometimes he just thought of men with beards and laughed.
➛
May 17, 2015

Its been so long though.

Its been so long though.
➛
May 17, 2015

One day who knows when beards will be out.

One day who knows when beards will be out.
➛
May 17, 2015

I tried to talk to people who lived through the 1991...

I tried to talk to people who lived through the 1991 Thirtysomething finale to learn what's next but the nurses wouldn't let me on the ward.
➛
May 17, 2015

leah I used to write mad men crit for slate I got this

@leahfinnegan leah I used to write mad men crit for slate I got this
➛
May 17, 2015

Writers: Tonight is a great night to give an editor bad...

Writers: Tonight is a great night to give an editor bad news.
➛
May 17, 2015

as a contrib ed its expected right?

@leahfinnegan as a contrib ed its expected right?
➛
May 17, 2015

Tonight is the recapper's Superbowl.

Tonight is the recapper's Superbowl.
➛
May 17, 2015

What if the finale is about a couple who planned to watch...

What if the finale is about a couple who planned to watch it together but after a series of comic mishaps they live a life of unhappiness.
➛
May 17, 2015

Is this the finale to mad men

@rustyk5 Is this the finale to mad men
➛
May 16, 2015

the answer is obviously self-driving prisons

@rustyk5 the answer is obviously self-driving prisons
➛
May 16, 2015

brian it's beautiful outside don't be this guy

@briankimisms brian it's beautiful outside don't be this guy
➛
May 16, 2015

Sometimes I look at my children and I feel my heart melting...

Sometimes I look at my children and I feel my heart melting and I know that my heart is not steel beams and that their love is not jet fuel.
➛
May 16, 2015

Saturday mornings are reserved for group 4—did you not get...

@shani_o Saturday mornings are reserved for group 4—did you not get the sign-up sheet? I pulled your things out and put them in a bag.
➛
May 16, 2015

I mean no one who could say that could be a bad person in...

@Choire I mean no one who could say that could be a bad person in any way.
➛
May 16, 2015

“But for ruminants, you know, the grass is always greener.”

@Choire “But for ruminants, you know, the grass is always greener.”
➛
May 16, 2015

I wonder if AirBNB asked anyone before it sponsored the...

I wonder if AirBNB asked anyone before it sponsored the Brooklyn half-marathon or if it just put up the website and waited.
➛
May 16, 2015

all parrots are my friends

@tolar all parrots are my friends
➛
May 15, 2015

whoa that lizard is wayyyy toooo big

@lastnightsdinnr whoa that lizard is wayyyy toooo big
➛
May 15, 2015

these were pretty nice scrubs tbh, they were clearly...

@leahfinnegan these were pretty nice scrubs tbh, they were clearly designed to work in, but also had a cool fit, very pro
➛
May 15, 2015

it was like they were on twitter but in real life

@leahfinnegan it was like they were on twitter but in real life
➛
May 15, 2015

it's like what we do but these are real people with actual...

@leahfinnegan it's like what we do but these are real people with actual jobs and they do something meaningful
➛
May 15, 2015

and she went i'm 32 basically it was cute nurses burning...

@leahfinnegan and she went i'm 32 basically it was cute nurses burning each other all day into the evening
➛
May 15, 2015

the lady nurse was making fun of the dude nurse for being a...

@leahfinnegan the lady nurse was making fun of the dude nurse for being a dude. then she found my vein and he went "35 years of experience"
➛
May 15, 2015

rubbing it in is just mean

@leahfinnegan rubbing it in is just mean
➛
May 15, 2015

Which was cool because I was wearing my Baudrillard-brand...

Which was cool because I was wearing my Baudrillard-brand boxer briefs.
➛
May 15, 2015

Some of the nurses at the doctor's were wearing Grey's...

Some of the nurses at the doctor's were wearing Grey's Anatomy-brand scrubs today. amazon.com/...
➛
May 15, 2015

yall had a very different kind of grandfather than I did

@indiamos @tcarmody yall had a very different kind of grandfather than I did
➛
May 15, 2015

sorry if i ruffled your feathers

@tcarmody sorry if i ruffled your feathers
➛
May 15, 2015

skipped right over dad humor into granddad this is not a...

skipped right over dad humor into granddad this is not a drill
➛
May 15, 2015

parrots in an open relationship will accept a cockatoo

parrots in an open relationship will accept a cockatoo
➛
May 15, 2015

they're in an open relationship and everyone accepts a...

@kjhealy they're in an open relationship and everyone accepts a cockatoo
➛
May 15, 2015

don't make this complicated laurie

@seldo don't make this complicated laurie
➛
May 15, 2015

Right maybe we just all need monkeys.

@symptomatic Right maybe we just all need monkeys.
➛
May 15, 2015

My friend and his wife are in a relationship with their...

My friend and his wife are in a relationship with their parrot, they are crackeramorous.
➛
May 15, 2015

which word is it?

@katzish which word is it?
➛
May 15, 2015

It's an important question: Can shoulder pets survive in a...

It's an important question: Can shoulder pets survive in a world of smartphones, emotional support animals, extreme tattooes, and SSRIs?
➛
May 15, 2015

I just assumed it had become a massive 3/4-square mile wine...

I just assumed it had become a massive 3/4-square mile wine bar.
➛
May 15, 2015

That's crazy I had no idea the West Village is still there.

That's crazy I had no idea the West Village is still there.
➛
May 15, 2015

I'm getting tweeted reports of a lot of shoulder pets...

I'm getting tweeted reports of a lot of shoulder pets coming in now (looks down at papers, then up at camera) possibly in the West Village.
➛
May 15, 2015

Nothing says “I need extreme amounts of attention, but at a...

Nothing says “I need extreme amounts of attention, but at a minimum distance of eight feet,” like a large bird or lizard on your body.
➛
May 15, 2015

that's good, that's promising

@Jamiejhagen that's good, that's promising
➛
May 15, 2015

maybe smartphones killed shoulder pets

maybe smartphones killed shoulder pets
➛
May 15, 2015

that's comforting

@jordne that's comforting
➛
May 15, 2015

in general it feels like weird shoulder pets is no longer a...

in general it feels like weird shoulder pets is no longer a thing which is sad because it clearly was our last sociocultural link to pirates
➛
May 15, 2015

are there still people with pet shoulder lizards in nyc it...

are there still people with pet shoulder lizards in nyc it feels like it's been years
➛
May 15, 2015

I think @jwherrman should run native ads and I should be in...

@fmanjoo I think @jwherrman should run native ads and I should be in charge of QA for Scoop, but instead of bug reports I write essays.
➛
May 15, 2015

I liked the original Content Wars but hated the prequels.

I liked the original Content Wars but hated the prequels.
➛
May 15, 2015

i will add this to my linkedin

@leahfinnegan i will add this to my linkedin
➛
May 15, 2015

I found out when they asked me to remove my own name on the...

@leahfinnegan I found out when they asked me to remove my own name on the web
➛
May 15, 2015

harper's made me contrib then removed me but didn't tell me

@leahfinnegan harper's made me contrib then removed me but didn't tell me
➛
May 15, 2015

a contributing editor writes periodically, supports his or...

@leahfinnegan a contributing editor writes periodically, supports his or her friends as they produce a pub and offers advice when asked
➛
May 15, 2015

Tim you really are and I just couldn't do it.

@timothymeaney Tim you really are and I just couldn't do it.
➛
May 15, 2015

the answer, as always, is micropayments

@DianaHarrisjyd the answer, as always, is micropayments
➛
May 15, 2015

I allude to type conversion in a forthcoming Businessweek...

@thejefflarson @harrisj I allude to type conversion in a forthcoming Businessweek piece.
➛
May 15, 2015

:cool-kid-thumbs-up-nodding:

@anildash :cool-kid-thumbs-up-nodding:
➛
May 15, 2015

there is literally no guidebook for these situations (picks...

there is literally no guidebook for these situations (picks up a book called TWEET-$TRAT FOR TIER B THOT LEEDERZ) omg there IS
➛
May 15, 2015

i know that tweeting out a press release about myself...

i know that tweeting out a press release about myself without actually giving you something to read is intolerable but a person has a role
➛
May 15, 2015

Hi I'm writing a column about DATABASES for The New...

Hi I'm writing a column about DATABASES for The New Republic ask me how to fix your iPhone adweek.com/...
➛
May 15, 2015

Gonna write about databases and it's gonna be COOOOOOOOOL.

@guyvidra Gonna write about databases and it's gonna be COOOOOOOOOL.
➛
May 14, 2015

these dynamically generated spotify playlists are...

these dynamically generated spotify playlists are gooooooood furia.com/...
➛
May 14, 2015

Could god make a house so tiny no one could blog it?

Could god make a house so tiny no one could blog it?
➛
May 14, 2015

i mean *I'M* the bargain bin paul ford

@jamiekeiles i mean *I'M* the bargain bin paul ford
➛
May 14, 2015

they are being goofy your voice is great and hilarious the...

@jamiekeiles they are being goofy your voice is great and hilarious the last thing it needs is bloated fordish formulations
➛
May 14, 2015

look i'm not going to pretend that this is not incredibly...

@jamiekeiles look i'm not going to pretend that this is not incredibly satisfying for my ego but also it is TERRIBLE advice
➛
May 14, 2015

i'm sorry we ruined publishing for you

@jamiekeiles i'm sorry we ruined publishing for you
➛
May 14, 2015

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA no nooooooooooooooooo that can't be real

@jamiekeiles BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA no nooooooooooooooooo that can't be real
➛
May 14, 2015

kid can write http://thehairpin.com/2015/05/a-millennial-rev...

kid can write thehairpin.com/...
➛
May 14, 2015

I think they will believe us if we just show up in...

@jkottke I think they will believe us if we just show up in sweatpants and sob the whole time
➛
May 14, 2015

Elon Musk is basically devising a plan for all humanity....

Elon Musk is basically devising a plan for all humanity. Hope you like it! bloomberg.com/... (This article is great.)
➛
May 14, 2015

“I am intolerable right now” should be considered a valid...

“I am intolerable right now” should be considered a valid excuse for skipping a party.
➛
May 14, 2015

Before the flame deluge there were two kinds of...

@kjhealy @john_overholt Before the flame deluge there were two kinds of people—First-Pagers, and the scholars, known as Whole-Articles.
➛
May 13, 2015

I read it Bilderboard magazine

@leahfinnegan I read it Bilderboard magazine
➛
May 13, 2015

Horst Wessel lied went to #1

@leahfinnegan Horst Wessel lied went to #1
➛
May 13, 2015

leah "Nazi pets in order of guilt"

@leahfinnegan leah "Nazi pets in order of guilt"
➛
May 13, 2015

leah do u want a million hits

@leahfinnegan leah do u want a million hits
➛
May 13, 2015

I'm laughing so hard I'm crying.

@leahfinnegan I'm laughing so hard I'm crying.
➛
May 13, 2015

she was only following odors!

@leahfinnegan she was only following odors!
➛
May 13, 2015

the only government acronym that means anything is USA

@harrisj @rustyk5 the only government acronym that means anything is USA
➛
May 13, 2015

Just a pleasant day in extreme air conditioning watching...

Just a pleasant day in extreme air conditioning watching smart people demo cool interactive products. #thegraduateshow15
➛
May 13, 2015

At #thegraduateshow15 with the awesome students of @svaixd...

At #thegraduateshow15 with the awesome students of @svaixd who are READY FOR THE WORLD.
➛
May 12, 2015

oh yeah big chunks of failure down the failure drain

@blondone oh yeah big chunks of failure down the failure drain
➛
May 12, 2015

so much easier to cut

@blondone so much easier to cut
➛
May 12, 2015

Every word I write is one less word I have to write.

Every word I write is one less word I have to write.
➛
May 12, 2015

hare my fun. Sorry that cut off.

hare my fun. Sorry that cut off.
➛
May 12, 2015

Reader's Digest says that I have perfect manners so you can...

Reader's Digest says that I have perfect manners so you can all s
➛
May 12, 2015

oh I just bought a copy all that is goooone

@dodgethestmrlr oh I just bought a copy all that is goooone
➛
May 12, 2015

Tumblr is a great place to use meth with your friends...

Tumblr is a great place to use meth with your friends online motherboard.vice.com/...
➛
May 12, 2015

Leslie Harpold had to be dead for like eight years before...

@PJVogt Leslie Harpold had to be dead for like eight years before they'd allow it.
➛
May 12, 2015

no, no i consented to syndication. no control over...

@goldfine @joeld no, no i consented to syndication. no control over titles/edits on syndication. all very normal.
➛
May 12, 2015

And everyone hates the documentation team.

And everyone hates the documentation team.
➛
May 12, 2015

I read this and assume that the mail team hates the...

I read this and assume that the mail team hates the hangouts team so, so, so, so much. twitter.com/...
➛
May 12, 2015

At some point in our lifetime there will be a real live...

At some point in our lifetime there will be a real live physical Museum of Twitter.
➛
May 12, 2015

it's text, works on the web, displays markdown beautifully...

@laura_june @joshuatopolsky it's text, works on the web, displays markdown beautifully in preview, has an editor, and saves every change
➛
May 12, 2015

oh god laura I swear to god this is real, you should just...

@laura_june @joshuatopolsky oh god laura I swear to god this is real, you should just do all your editing in github
➛
May 12, 2015

there's no way to start over we can just go on

@leahfinnegan there's no way to start over we can just go on
➛
May 12, 2015

seriously a mac se with a fucking floppy disk it was easier

@laura_june seriously a mac se with a fucking floppy disk it was easier
➛
May 12, 2015

jesus i thought it was just me

@laura_june jesus i thought it was just me
➛
May 12, 2015

Also I need to sit here and make jokes about a major...

@MikeIsaac Also I need to sit here and make jokes about a major telecom/content acquisition for a while, that's just what I am.
➛
May 12, 2015

there are PEOPLE who work there mike

@MikeIsaac there are PEOPLE who work there mike
➛
May 12, 2015

They'll let you back in when they hire you.

@leahfinnegan They'll let you back in when they hire you.
➛
May 12, 2015

Everyone worried about HuffPo needs to stop crying like a...

Everyone worried about HuffPo needs to stop crying like a big distressed baby.
➛
May 12, 2015

Today: Verizon buys Aol. Tomorrow: “Guys, we've been over...

Today: Verizon buys Aol. Tomorrow: “Guys, we've been over this. When support call volume is low, you KNOW you should be blogging.”
➛
May 12, 2015

“Hi. I'm having some trouble with my journalism today.”...

“Hi. I'm having some trouble with my journalism today.” “Sure, let me bring up your account.”
➛
May 12, 2015

If you can't trust Verizon's editorial judgment, what can...

If you can't trust Verizon's editorial judgment, what can you trust?
➛
May 12, 2015

first I saw it, or that title. My god.

@joeld first I saw it, or that title. My god.
➛
May 12, 2015

Oh no

Oh no
➛
May 11, 2015

let me know if I can help

@mattgillooly let me know if I can help
➛
May 11, 2015

this is such a strong idea

@mattgillooly this is such a strong idea
➛
May 11, 2015

doesn't tell me which sport has the dumbest fans though

@ftrain doesn't tell me which sport has the dumbest fans though
➛
May 11, 2015

Seriously what are people even doing with those Knight...

Seriously what are people even doing with those Knight Foundation grants?
➛
May 11, 2015

Why even have data journalism if no one can answer this...

Why even have data journalism if no one can answer this question?
➛
May 11, 2015

Which sport has the dumbest fans?

Which sport has the dumbest fans?
➛
May 11, 2015

actually tho calling Saxon from clojure and evalling XPath...

@jacqui @fhwang @harrisj @fidothe actually tho calling Saxon from clojure and evalling XPath is suuuuper sweet.
➛
May 11, 2015

guys when I need tree transforming JVM parasite languages I...

@jacqui @fhwang @harrisj @fidothe guys when I need tree transforming JVM parasite languages I go with Clojure.
➛
May 11, 2015

this is what the truth sounds like...

this is what the truth sounds like typedrummer.com/...
➛
May 11, 2015

you guys keep joking but i'm using org-mode with pandoc to...

@harrisj @fhwang you guys keep joking but i'm using org-mode with pandoc to generate docx and latex export for my own proofs
➛
May 11, 2015

guys it's in org-mode i'll just make a private repo

@fhwang @harrisj guys it's in org-mode i'll just make a private repo
➛
May 11, 2015

Oh no I do a lot of non-writing work so that I can actually...

@leahfinnegan Oh no I do a lot of non-writing work so that I can actually be middle class, by having two jobs I'm able to WAIT, GODDAMMIT.
➛
May 11, 2015

I love that this is the story as opposed to the decline...

@leahfinnegan I love that this is the story as opposed to the decline itself.
➛
May 11, 2015

The decline of the middle class is making it hard to...

The decline of the middle class is making it hard to politicians to know what to call poor people nytimes.com/...
➛
May 11, 2015

Oh wow this is a huge article about WHAT IS CODE so it...

@harrisj Oh wow this is a huge article about WHAT IS CODE so it actually is partially about bikeshedding!
➛
May 11, 2015

Man, people sure are less willing to give advice on an...

Man, people sure are less willing to give advice on an article draft when it's 38,000 words long.
➛
May 11, 2015

one person eating a meal alone in stench car is also a...

@Choire one person eating a meal alone in stench car is also a signifier
➛
May 11, 2015

I don't think that there any win95 browsers with emscripten...

@rustyk5 @waxpancake I don't think that there any win95 browsers with emscripten support, but at the same time this question is now valid.
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May 10, 2015

Nothing in programming is more pernicious than the myth of...

Nothing in programming is more pernicious than the myth of the 10x manager.
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May 10, 2015

it's soooo gooood

@nelson it's soooo gooood
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May 10, 2015

“because they can't find a working driver,” wiping away 22...

“because they can't find a working driver,” wiping away 22 consecutive years of tears
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May 10, 2015

THESE banners? Thanks, they're by Figlet.

THESE banners? Thanks, they're by Figlet.
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May 10, 2015

oh wow gnu apl mode is crazy https://twitter.com/ftrain/stat...

oh wow gnu apl mode is crazy twitter.com/...
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May 10, 2015

come and use it to teach classes i mean

@nelson come and use it to teach classes i mean
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May 10, 2015

I still want to come us it for classes. Once my book draft...

@nelson I still want to come us it for classes. Once my book draft is done.
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May 10, 2015

Yeah I mean HMMMMMMMM right? I mean it's a folly and it's...

@nelson Yeah I mean HMMMMMMMM right? I mean it's a folly and it's fine.
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May 10, 2015

♬She may hide forever in the streams of @twitter / she's...

@PJVogt @oliviataters ♬She may hide forever in the streams of @twitter / she's the bot who never returned.♬
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May 10, 2015

wait what is happening I am afk

@nelson wait what is happening I am afk
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May 10, 2015

I question the capitalist, patriarchal society that ...

I question the capitalist, patriarchal society that forces me to get up early with the kids to make this omelet.
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May 9, 2015

Deep down aren't we all lost children? Is a terrible thing...

Deep down aren't we all lost children? Is a terrible thing for a shopping center security guard to say.
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May 9, 2015

How they get you beer at Madison Square Garden:...

How they get you beer at Madison Square Garden: brewreview.com/... (38 miles of tubing).
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May 8, 2015

What was the riddle?

@bn2b What was the riddle?
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May 8, 2015

When Elton John came out to a journalist in NYC:...

When Elton John came out to a journalist in NYC: medium.com/...
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May 8, 2015

I mean it's more like “radio” than a podcast, you know?

@rustyk5 @PJVogt I mean it's more like “radio” than a podcast, you know?
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May 8, 2015

“I'm just going to the bathroom and I may be some time.”

@PJVogt “I'm just going to the bathroom and I may be some time.”
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May 8, 2015

PostgreSQL...landed...upsert http://git.postgresql.org/gitwe...

PostgreSQL...landed...upsert git.postgresql.org/...
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May 8, 2015

the houndstooth is super cool tho

@rustyk5 the houndstooth is super cool tho
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May 8, 2015

is there a good nyc tailor for fatties i can't mens...

is there a good nyc tailor for fatties i can't mens wearhouse this shit anymore
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May 8, 2015

“As your Concise Oxford sails toward me from across the...

“As your Concise Oxford sails toward me from across the room, let’s take some time to consider the arguments.” @blprnt/data-v-da0e0d24777c" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.com/@blprnt/data-v-da0e0d24777c
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May 8, 2015

Nerds, this is a great video, and it's for a Kim Stanley...

Nerds, this is a great video, and it's for a Kim Stanley Robinson book, so. youtu.be/...
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May 7, 2015

right my god who would have had a color terminal

@jackrusher right my god who would have had a color terminal
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May 7, 2015

also that “10” just hanging out in there

@ryanmhowell also that “10” just hanging out in there
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May 7, 2015

I wrote a function in FORTRAN for rhetorical purposes &...

I wrote a function in FORTRAN for rhetorical purposes & it's the most computer-looking computer language I've used. twitter.com/...
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May 7, 2015

I will make an app that can deliver a stiff drink wherever...

I will make an app that can deliver a stiff drink wherever you are and I will call it FlaskRabbit.
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May 7, 2015

That nail salon article about wage exploitation was amazing...

That nail salon article about wage exploitation was amazing and I can't wait to get my interns to reblog it.
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May 7, 2015

omg it really IS terrible when you whine it

@katja_kawa omg it really IS terrible when you whine it
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May 7, 2015

What is the worst word to hear whined?

What is the worst word to hear whined?
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May 7, 2015

I wonder if the dudes at the garage across the street are...

I wonder if the dudes at the garage across the street are yelling because they are excited about how loud their electric torque wrench is.
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May 6, 2015

I love Quora, it's like the VAX/VMS messageboard in college...

@bn2b @torrez @RodBegbie I love Quora, it's like the VAX/VMS messageboard in college and since I won't log in I can't read too much.
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May 6, 2015

I wonder if this screwed up his Uber offer too, but of...

@bn2b @RodBegbie @torrez I wonder if this screwed up his Uber offer too, but of course they would operate silently.
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May 6, 2015

I mean, Zenefits dude cares about his company and that...

@RodBegbie @bn2b @torrez I mean, Zenefits dude cares about his company and that leaked out a little, I like Zenefits more now.
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May 6, 2015

I mean, like, okay, the CEO shouldn't have done an HR thing...

@bn2b @torrez @RodBegbie I mean, like, okay, the CEO shouldn't have done an HR thing in public, but the original post was soooooo lame.
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May 6, 2015

I mean at some point don't you get to say “how about...

@bn2b @torrez @RodBegbie I mean at some point don't you get to say “how about fuuuuuuuuuuck youuuuuuuu.”
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May 6, 2015

Am I wrong for thinking that reply is completely justified...

@bn2b @torrez @RodBegbie Am I wrong for thinking that reply is completely justified and hilarious?
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May 6, 2015

New μ-Ziq album, nerds: https://open.spotify.com/album/68V5E...

New μ-Ziq album, nerds: open.spotify.com/...
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May 6, 2015

make the drones dance

make the drones dance
➛
May 6, 2015

This article on creative computing with Clojure is the good...

This article on creative computing with Clojure is the good stuff right here: radar.oreilly.com/...
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May 6, 2015

All it's missing is “ad”s!

@AGoldmund All it's missing is “ad”s!
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May 6, 2015

A better word for podcasting would be brocasting.

@AGoldmund A better word for podcasting would be brocasting.
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May 6, 2015

To be fair, the original meaning of podcast was two white...

@AGoldmund To be fair, the original meaning of podcast was two white dudes chuckling about websites for 150 minutes.
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May 6, 2015

i didn't mean to slide in there like it was a baby...

@leahfinnegan @jenniferdaniel i didn't mean to slide in there like it was a baby competition I just wanted to illustrate the hand holding
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May 6, 2015

You see it as ignoring your email but I see it as saving up...

You see it as ignoring your email but I see it as saving up my love.
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May 6, 2015

and then he did a good interview on BuzzFeeD where had to...

@AGoldmund @PJVogt @imbeccable and then he did a good interview on BuzzFeeD where had to straiiiin to not say “this is my daily nbd namaste”
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May 6, 2015

and then g a m e r g a t e peeps were like YOU SEE THEY...

@AGoldmund @PJVogt @imbeccable and then g a m e r g a t e peeps were like YOU SEE THEY KILL THEIR OWN
➛
May 6, 2015

people yelled at him on the internet about his feminism and...

@AGoldmund @PJVogt @imbeccable people yelled at him on the internet about his feminism and he was like, you guys do you, i'm off to write 💰💰
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May 6, 2015

ThinkUp uses PHP tho.

@anildash ThinkUp uses PHP tho.
➛
May 6, 2015

every year this is less and less my world...

every year this is less and less my world twitter.com/...
➛
May 6, 2015

I deleted that last tweet it shared too much.

I deleted that last tweet it shared too much.
➛
May 6, 2015

“Stand still so I can yell at you.” —Everyone

“Stand still so I can yell at you.” —Everyone
➛
May 6, 2015

i mean the way twitter gets you is you think you need it...

@shani_o @jennydeluxe @adambvary i mean the way twitter gets you is you think you need it but joss whedon doesn't need it for his goals
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May 6, 2015

and more like, GUESS I'LL LIE IN MY BED OF GOLD WITH A...

@shani_o @jennydeluxe @adambvary and more like, GUESS I'LL LIE IN MY BED OF GOLD WITH A QUILL PEN AND CALL JAMES WESLEY MARSTERS AND SAY SUP
➛
May 6, 2015

i think it was? but the framing was not OMG I CAN'T HANDLE...

@shani_o @jennydeluxe @adambvary i think it was? but the framing was not OMG I CAN'T HANDLE THE FORCE OF THIS INTERSECTIONAL FEMINISM
➛
May 5, 2015

the solo all-hands is the #1 meeting in journalism

@johnjcook the solo all-hands is the #1 meeting in journalism
➛
May 5, 2015

hahahahah OH GOD i mean i may

@seldo hahahahah OH GOD i mean i may
➛
May 5, 2015

sometimes when you're programming you really need to take a...

sometimes when you're programming you really need to take a minute to sit down at your standing desk and have a standup with yourself
➛
May 5, 2015

i've got a book standup going with a mentor. i'm all in...

@seldo i've got a book standup going with a mentor. i'm all in man. i mean but no user stories or anything.
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May 5, 2015

doesn't work for books

@seldo doesn't work for books
➛
May 5, 2015

it's sort of dispiriting when your project is a year late...

it's sort of dispiriting when your project is a year late but the software you use to create it is updated daily
➛
May 5, 2015

i know this is evil but it's insanely fun to contemplate...

i know this is evil but it's insanely fun to contemplate how it will be used volkskrant.nl/...
➛
May 5, 2015

oh they get even more insufferable page by page

@maureenflaherty oh they get even more insufferable page by page
➛
May 5, 2015

it's like evil storify

it's like evil storify
➛
May 5, 2015

wait this is 11 PAGES of comedian airline tweets...

wait this is 11 PAGES of comedian airline tweets splitsider.com/...
➛
May 5, 2015

We call that "The Google Hangout Point."

@rustyk5 We call that "The Google Hangout Point."
➛
May 5, 2015

this is great http://www.theawl.com/2015/05/leaving-new-york...

this is great theawl.com/...
➛
May 4, 2015

i can see that colouring your perceptions

@nk i can see that colouring your perceptions
➛
May 4, 2015

The Detective rides into the still-smoldering city. “Fans...

The Detective rides into the still-smoldering city. “Fans did this,” she says.
➛
May 4, 2015

IT DOES NOT BEGW"HJRIP"GHIJPREWRTH

@on3ness IT DOES NOT BEGW"HJRIP"GHIJPREWRTH
➛
May 4, 2015

I know it's not the biggest deal but when people misuse...

I know it's not the biggest deal but when people misuse “beg the question,” they sound like they are trying to be smart and my soul dies.
➛
May 4, 2015

Nice story pal, but let me just...[sound of snapping]...

Nice story pal, but let me just...[sound of snapping] situate that for you.
➛
May 4, 2015

can we really afford not to let him try?

@laura_june can we really afford not to let him try?
➛
May 4, 2015

thanks anil I can count on you

@anildash @Awl thanks anil I can count on you
➛
May 4, 2015

important dancon http://www.theawl.com/2015/05/how-to-beat-a...

important dancon theawl.com/...
➛
May 3, 2015

oh duh it was rip this tweet

@hyperpape oh duh it was rip this tweet
➛
May 3, 2015

Oh man then I read that donut poem as something VERY...

@thelancearthur Oh man then I read that donut poem as something VERY different than you intended.
➛
May 3, 2015

the poem on page 211 hooooooly shit...

the poem on page 211 hooooooly shit twitter.com/...
➛
May 3, 2015

I know, feedback forever. I liked your Medium piece a lot...

@thelancearthur I know, feedback forever. I liked your Medium piece a lot because you are very funny.
➛
May 3, 2015

I don't perceive time but instead live in the eternal...

@davidcho I don't perceive time but instead live in the eternal moment.
➛
May 3, 2015

THIS. https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/594980586432897024

THIS. twitter.com/...
➛
May 3, 2015

i guess I COULD cut and paste but then the...um people with...

i guess I COULD cut and paste but then the...um people with good memories...who are my Online Palz are all like OMG YOU TWEETED THAT IN 1995
➛
May 3, 2015

that's so much work though

@anniesperson that's so much work though
➛
May 3, 2015

that you can't retweet yourself really hurts this platform

that you can't retweet yourself really hurts this platform
➛
May 3, 2015

Sometimes you eat the brand and sometimes the brand eats...

Sometimes you eat the brand and sometimes the brand eats you.
➛
May 3, 2015

we gave this to the twins and suggested they color...

we gave this to the twins and suggested they color PROGRESSIVELY facebook.com/... and now they're watching that frigging pony cartoon
➛
May 3, 2015

I'm printing this out and sending it to your dad.

@digiphile I'm printing this out and sending it to your dad.
➛
May 3, 2015

PAPER, ALEX, PAPER

@digiphile PAPER, ALEX, PAPER
➛
May 3, 2015

What's the policy on including your own tweets in prose?...

What's the policy on including your own tweets in prose? Jonah Lehrer-level or no big deal?
➛
May 2, 2015

my essay on breasts is coming out soon

@leahfinnegan my essay on breasts is coming out soon
➛
May 2, 2015

there's one paragraph in there which hooooo doggies i mean...

@leahfinnegan there's one paragraph in there which hooooo doggies i mean there are a few but there's one
➛
May 2, 2015

Over, say, 50 years. Income equality? Worse. Reproductive...

@vruba @justinpickard @EmmaSlager Over, say, 50 years. Income equality? Worse. Reproductive rights? Mixed. Educational access? Better.
➛
May 2, 2015

A genuinely useful exercise here that would be amazing is...

@vruba @justinpickard @EmmaSlager A genuinely useful exercise here that would be amazing is to make a list of things that are worse/better.
➛
May 2, 2015

I called my dad after I moved to NYC and said The world is...

@vruba @justinpickard @EmmaSlager I called my dad after I moved to NYC and said The world is a mess! he said, you're just reading the Times.
➛
May 2, 2015

At times, following @maura on Spotify yields AMAZING...

At times, following @maura on Spotify yields AMAZING results: open.spotify.com/...
➛
May 2, 2015

gonna do a little writing, got a cup of coffee, and days of...

gonna do a little writing, got a cup of coffee, and days of open hand on spotify
➛
May 2, 2015

Wait, CAN you move back into Zeus's head?

@Choire Wait, CAN you move back into Zeus's head?
➛
May 1, 2015

just hit me ford@ftrain.com DMs drive me crazy

@FurryPad just hit me ford@ftrain.com DMs drive me crazy
➛
May 1, 2015

how many freaking pirate hats can they WEAR

@jeremyzilar how many freaking pirate hats can they WEAR
➛
May 1, 2015

Can I switch to just Sunday delivery tho.

@jeremyzilar Can I switch to just Sunday delivery tho.
➛
Apr 30, 2015

i mean they are so tired of fatties

@jordne i mean they are so tired of fatties
➛
Apr 30, 2015

i mean, dude seemed in control of his shit

@jordne i mean, dude seemed in control of his shit
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