Ftrain, by Paul Ford

Here you can see the problem. I had this moment biking the bridge when I thought, "I'd better order kung pao chicken because it's fewer calories than General Tso's." That was wrong. I also thought: "I should definitely order some Chinese food because that way my website will have some more drama." That was even more wrong. This is the complicated pathway that the little feeder within--let's call him Edmund, my middle name--will take in order to ply the brain. So here we see, for the first time since the outset of this project, the well-trod path to disaster. What I want now is a big pile of ice cream, which I would both eat and smear all over my soft and massive stomach while making subtle honking noises like a skyscraper-sized duck.