Ftrain, by Paul Ford
July 2020
There are two narratives now, this sort of "we have a plan"...
@winterjessica There are two narratives now, this sort of "we have a plan" narrative and the "we all know how this will go" narrative. And it's hard to tell which one is even the official narrative.
➛No, probably not.
@winterjessica No, probably not.
➛Agreed!
Screenshot of every time I try Jupyter.
What if I need to talk about PDFs?
@karenmcgrane What if I need to talk about PDFs?
➛Cocteau Twins are so good though.
@hyperpape @rebekahentralgo Cocteau Twins are so good though.
➛What's the DEAL with <blink> tags? You SERIOUSLY...
@chochinov What's the DEAL with <blink> tags? You SERIOUSLY can't decide whether something is "on" or "off"? What are you, a toddler? You need ATTENTION? STOP BLINKING AND MAKE UP YOUR MIND. Folks, HTML, it stands for How Turds Make Livings. Shut up, Microsoft, I'm doing <marquee> next.
➛"He inspired BLOB support in Datasette" is truly--truly!--...
I think the idea of tree transformation is just too weird...
@harrisj @amywebb @moiragweigel @merbroussard @LatoyaPeterson @chrisspurgeon @hbillings I think the idea of tree transformation is just too weird for mainstream. What people seem to understand is how to iterate over inbound records, cherry-pick data elements, and commit those to storage. It was a kind of worse-is-better all over again.
➛IMO though what people REALLY want is an interchange format...
@harrisj @amywebb @moiragweigel @merbroussard @LatoyaPeterson @chrisspurgeon @hbillings IMO though what people REALLY want is an interchange format that maps to relational DBs. And we could never accept that about ourselves. I do not understand why.
➛Multilingual-by-default with an easy story around...
@harrisj @amywebb @moiragweigel @merbroussard @LatoyaPeterson @chrisspurgeon @hbillings Multilingual-by-default with an easy story around hierarchies, validated schemas, good tooling, and easy tree structures. Just too bulky (but compressed well!)
➛God but seriously can we
@harrisj @moiragweigel @merbroussard @amywebb @LatoyaPeterson @chrisspurgeon @hbillings God but seriously can we
➛Hey Moira!
Oh wow a pedantic technologist
@harrisj @moiragweigel @merbroussard @amywebb @LatoyaPeterson @chrisspurgeon @hbillings Oh wow a pedantic technologist
➛I know what they're going for here but all I see is nice...
we should have this fight on discord
@textfiles @tjowens we should have this fight on discord
➛Yeah that's real. We think of Twitter and Facebook etc as...
@jadedid @tjowens @textfiles Yeah that's real. We think of Twitter and Facebook etc as software companies but maybe they're really telecom.
➛I'm buying an old Encyclopedia Britannica and heading for...
But...all digital products ARE CMSes.
@DanielZarick @goldman But...all digital products ARE CMSes.
➛Possibly, and if the market tanks, but I think it's also...
@textfiles @tjowens Possibly, and if the market tanks, but I think it's also possible it gets a second wind. It's an oddly resistant platform.
➛I know this is the single most depressing thing I've ever...
@DanielZarick I know this is the single most depressing thing I've ever written and I'm sorry.
➛You deeply invest in your personal and professional...
@DanielZarick You deeply invest in your personal and professional relationships—even boring parts—and decide to master your disciplines. As a result your healthier daily life begins to offer more engagement and stimulus than can be provided by this platform, until you forget to visit.
➛Joke will be on me when in 2033 I'm logging into...
Joke will be on me when in 2033 I'm logging into BaiduTweetOS to use Twitter Docs and sending DMails and getting my health insurance through Twatreon+FavCare, a new program that uses the wisdom of crowds to let EVERYONE be your doctor!
➛One of those movies where friends promise to marry each...
One of those movies where friends promise to marry each other if they turn 26 still single, but instead it's friends promising to keep each other away from On Here.
➛A while ago Twitter sent me a message celebrating my 13...
A while ago Twitter sent me a message celebrating my 13 years on Twitter, which, okay, things happen. But if I'm still on this site in 2033 getting “Happy 26th Tweet-i-versary!” messages—I mean, now I know. I actively need to start working on the world where that can't happen.
➛It's from 2015 and yet I'm still here.
@rebeccablood It's from 2015 and yet I'm still here.
➛Every month I get stung but I'm just too lazy to change it.
I forgot about this. This is a nightmare.
@phyllisstein @LeavittAlone I forgot about this. This is a nightmare.
➛It answered so many questions!
This article by @jessfraz in this month's @CACMmag is very...
This article by @jessfraz in this month's @CACMmag is very clear and super helpful for understanding data center electricity usage. It's not the tech subject of this news cycle but it's a super-important subject for the long-haul. cacm.acm.org/...
➛I would die for the Internet Archive.
Fair
Proud to say that my Substack batch has not reply-alled....
Retweeting this because of secret dogs.
I'm so ready
@younggalaxy I'm so ready
➛i'll be the rooooooounnnndabout
@510home @MarkRiffey i'll be the rooooooounnnndabout
➛IDK if I don't get off Twitter I'm like 99% shuffling...
Perfect! Thank you.
@textfiles Perfect! Thank you.
➛but amy we're the people who make the things we like
guess i need another song for my funeral
guess i need another song for my funeral
➛our brains weren't meant to get this smooth
our brains weren't meant to get this smooth
➛oh yes one of my all-time favorite singer-songwriters is...
oh yes one of my all-time favorite singer-songwriters is here on twitter talking about each track on his albums over 25 years my god those songs hold up and oh hey now he's tweeting that bill gates is murdering us all with vaccines
➛Would this change the behavior of the python ia client if...
@textfiles Would this change the behavior of the python ia client if you're downloading collections, etc. based on --search results?
➛At this point I'd welcome it.
@elaorleans At this point I'd welcome it.
➛Fair and I am sorry.
His battery people are doing a lot of energy delivery at...
His battery people are doing a lot of energy delivery at scale work that is potentially really important and it is utterly buried under sub moldbuggian hurrdurr lesswrong p0wns.
➛The thing is he doesn't really SAY anything on here that...
The thing is he doesn't really SAY anything on here that like a 15-year-old edgelord would't say. He just trolls over and over and mercilessly and everyone gets their dunks on him while he appreciates in value by hundreds of millions of dollars.
➛This is great!
I cannot no matter how I try eliminate Eln Msk from my...
I cannot no matter how I try eliminate Eln Msk from my feeds. I've blocked/muted everything possible but the screenshots, outrage, Grms-relate drama, and dunks all just prove that he's the most successful troll on earth. The only way to fully block him will be true general AI.
➛I think this one is on me.
I think this one is on me.
➛Or maybe that's an actual app! The source didn't make it...
@Robot_Bastard Or maybe that's an actual app! The source didn't make it clear. Worlds within worlds!
➛One side-effect of me making fun of everything for 20 years...
One side-effect of me making fun of everything for 20 years in public is that people frequently assume I'm making fun of everything.
➛I agree!
@jfeckstein I agree!
➛The military PPT aesthetic and the 90s zine aesthetic and...
@Robot_Bastard The military PPT aesthetic and the 90s zine aesthetic and the early web aesthetic, these are my favorite things because they reveal so much about what humans prioritize.
➛Oh I'm REALLY not mocking, although I know it could seem...
@Robot_Bastard Oh I'm REALLY not mocking, although I know it could seem that way. It's a specific view into a huge bureaucracy that otherwise civilians never see. I feel about military PPTs the same way I feel about the early web--the medium and the message are both getting worked out.
➛Government RFPs are absolutely amazing. I've sat on many...
@ItsTheBrandi Government RFPs are absolutely amazing. I've sat on many calls about contracting and RFPs. Once it was eight people and some of them had retired by the time we did the next call two weeks later.
➛It uses the PRNG built into SQLite3, which uses the...
@dev_random @thegrugq It uses the PRNG built into SQLite3, which uses the underlying OS, which is Linux 5, so you'd know better than me.
➛Civilians: Thank you for your service. Vets: Thanks, I...
Civilians: Thank you for your service.
Vets: Thanks, I went to into extreme danger without enough body armor in order to analyze enormous amount of the urine of my fellow soldiers and enter the results into a bad Windows app.
➛Vets: Thanks, I went to into extreme danger without enough body armor in order to analyze enormous amount of the urine of my fellow soldiers and enter the results into a bad Windows app.
I think these slides are helping me understand the vets I...
I think these slides are helping me understand the vets I know so much better.
➛I didn't even notice until you pointed it out.
@acupoftea I didn't even notice until you pointed it out.
➛Welp
It's how I unwind.
@mattlanger It's how I unwind.
➛It's good! I also really enjoy occasionally closing all the...
@ShortFormErnie @ow It's good! I also really enjoy occasionally closing all the articles and seeing the hundreds of things I'd been learning.
➛The upcoming BEGIN CONCURRENT/wal2 features might help with...
The biopic/story of the band/project Ministry.
@toomuchnick The biopic/story of the band/project Ministry.
➛Lot to unpack here.
Gotcha right here (cc @ZanMcQuade Todd Rundgren cover)
the key is to use -P12 as an argument to xargs to use all...
coupla hours
those costumes smelled like axe
@phyllisstein those costumes smelled like axe
➛I know but even with 12 core/24 threads and parallelized...
@ShortFormErnie I know but even with 12 core/24 threads and parallelized like crazy it's many hours. That said I've made a tiny webapp that loads 100 random pages every reload so I can just swim in ridiculous ephemera.
➛Saturday afternoon I'll drive to the drugstore and get a...
Saturday afternoon I'll drive to the drugstore and get a Sunday New York Times.
➛god no it does not
@hooyoobee god no it does not
➛Hey honey after dinner I'll do the dishes and then we can...
Hey honey after dinner I'll do the dishes and then we can go out to our office in the barn to look at the static checkerboard image my Amiga 2000 rendered for me. Then we can nestle under shawls while you read Wide Sargasso Sea out loud to me while I page through GAMES Magazine.
➛Imagine something taking 29 minutes today. You'd have to...
Imagine something taking 29 minutes today. You'd have to tweet about it.
➛I loaded 200 gigs of PDFs into a database to find this.
OH sweeeet
I'll gist it when I'm back at the machine.
100gb? I also put in the PDFs and thumbnails. I have 60tb...
A flask endpoint that reads a blob with apsw's blob...
I would be so sad if they did though
Conversion to PDF can cause that.
@the_FrederickS Conversion to PDF can cause that.
➛Tweet
blob
Tweet
And some other stuff. But I bootstrap everything like this...
More amazing PPT slides from .mil
So I've spent hours and hours (“Amazing Military...
@goldman So I've spent hours and hours (“Amazing Military Infographics” by Paul Ford link.medium.com/... and like always you start in disbelief and come away with empathy, and some sadness.
➛I'm deep into a logistics hole right now
I'm deep into a logistics hole right now
➛I made a shell script that loads thousands of PDF docs into...
I made a shell script that loads thousands of PDF docs into SQLite databases. That means I can have a web server that produces infinite randomly chosen US Military PowerPoint slides that I can scroll on my phone when I'm around the house.
Tweet
It's awful. Ours is becoming a Food Bazaar which means that...
Definitely put a damper on the whole thing.
@jfeckstein Definitely put a damper on the whole thing.
➛Taligent should have won.
it's incredibly bad
@charlesfogelman it's incredibly bad
➛What is he saying?
this is news to me!
me: oh computer you're right again computer: (slowly)
finally found a title for my memoir
Right but what's MacBird?
avant garde magazine is bullying me
i'm sure it hums all the time
@xxbobbyzxx i'm sure it hums all the time
➛Brief cognitive overload reading this.
It's 7am
@xxbobbyzxx @richziade It's 7am
➛This is two hours I'll never get back.
This is two hours I'll never get back.
➛Wait, Jon Anderson and Vangelis did four albums together?
Wait, Jon Anderson and Vangelis did four albums together?
➛Except....
Except....
➛Before you engage please understand, this is a shitpost.
Before you engage please understand, this is a shitpost.
➛It feels like Internet culture can now be split into two...
It feels like Internet culture can now be split into two camps, podcasts and Discord.
➛A big part of this for me is realizing I don't have any...
@textfiles A big part of this for me is realizing I don't have any idea about what's happening on Discord.
➛oh i read through the whole thing, and it solved a specific...
@textfiles @dj_ir0ngruve oh i read through the whole thing, and it solved a specific problem i had about downloading a specific thing!
➛what........in god's name
@dj_ir0ngruve what........in god's name
➛Oh god man our dishwasher is busted too and I'm the kitchen...
I just googled "discord where they talk about digital...
I just googled "discord where they talk about digital archives" that's where I'm at socially in the pandemic.
➛I learned a ton from this podcast.
OH NO (reads post) well that's extremely sensible. Glad to...
I think this is Hamilton? I've never seen it.
I think this is Hamilton? I've never seen it.
➛Let's burn down the church Let's burn down the...
Let's burn down the church
Let's burn down the steeple
Name's Dr. Thomas Stockmann
And I'm an enemy of the people
➛Let's burn down the steeple
Name's Dr. Thomas Stockmann
And I'm an enemy of the people
If Ibsen wrote "An Enemy of the People" today every single...
If Ibsen wrote "An Enemy of the People" today every single character in the play would have to conclude that they, in fact, were the brave doctor speaking truth to power. Also it would need to be a musical.
➛There has to be a way to replace the audio. I have been so...
behold
Boppi the booty-shaking llama (an earlier model of this...
Greenwood Playground does
@winterjessica Greenwood Playground does
➛Yes!
(yelling from inside my coffin) it's actually a very...
@annawiener @jeffehobbs (yelling from inside my coffin) it's actually a very interesting subject
➛i...just realized something about myself
You shouldn't have any problem raising a Series Eyyyyyyyy.
Asking for a friend who needs to communicate hard science...
Asking for a friend who needs to communicate hard science and hard climate truths to the world—do you know any
- good content production studios?
- good small PR firms focused on media outreach?
Feel free to DM (but others will find the thread helpful). Out-of-NYC totally fine.
➛- good content production studios?
- good small PR firms focused on media outreach?
Feel free to DM (but others will find the thread helpful). Out-of-NYC totally fine.
he has a lot of cores
A little context for those of you who missed this critical...
A little context for those of you who missed this critical moment in our culture. youtu.be/...
➛Henry Cavill building his own PC is the WFH version of...
Henry Cavill building his own PC is the WFH version of Superman III.
➛You're in for a good Wikipedia page
@yuckycatbreath You're in for a good Wikipedia page en.wikipedia.org/...
➛those photos are beautiful
@procload @mercantilelib those photos are beautiful
➛This one is cool until you realize they're all Readers...
This one is cool until you realize they're all Readers Digest Condensed Editions commons.wikimedia.org/...
check it out it's Vampire Library
Here's a set of 832 very large images of reading rooms.
Here's a set of 832 very large images of reading rooms. commons.wikimedia.org/...
➛Tweet
you see, nick, no
@nickhurley you see, nick, no
➛yours is more new mexico stucco/delicious cake though
@phyllisstein yours is more new mexico stucco/delicious cake though
➛Or “Mali empire” (but I needed to take it down to 4,000...
Or “Meiji period”
Or “Meiji period” commons.wikimedia.org/...
➛Tweet
Tweet
Tweet
A nice thing to do to wind down is to search on Wikimedia...
A nice thing to do to wind down is to search on Wikimedia Commons for really big images (which then can be used as desktop backgrounds). Here's a sample search for “cathedral interiors.” commons.wikimedia.org/...
➛I changed a letter in the hash because I don't want any...
I changed a letter in the hash because I don't want any problems.
➛Tbh, bc1qxy2kgdygxrsqtzq2n0yrf2493p83kkfjhx0wlh
Tbh, bc1qxy2kgdygxrsqtzq2n0yrf2493p83kkfjhx0wlh
➛No one has created a brand/bag anywhere near that iconic...
Tweet
Just one, small NYC beach given over to proper Victorian...
@phyllisstein Just one, small NYC beach given over to proper Victorian bathing is all I ask for.
➛Imagine the RELIEF
Tweet
just people in the moment not a cell phone in sight
SNOBOL RESURGENT
Seriously please @DoorDash_Help you are ruining our ability...
Seriously please @DoorDash_Help you are ruining our ability to sleep at night with this. t.co/...
➛"Psygnosis was offered the game before U.S. Gold, but...
"Psygnosis was offered the game before U.S. Gold, but turned it down for being too weird." en.wikipedia.org/...
➛can't sleep so
it's new to me and oh god
@misscrisp it's new to me and oh god
➛when they pitch a new version of youtube called "bbc me" on...
when they pitch a new version of youtube called "bbc me" on w1a it's a leeeeettle close to the bone
➛turns out i wasn't cake after all (dies)
turns out i wasn't cake after all (dies)
➛Thank you!
@______nah @NYCParksDept Thank you!
➛A parent's miraculous survival? For some morticians it's...
A parent's miraculous survival? For some morticians it's not good news.
➛Come on with this.
I'm a real new Yorker bobby
@xxbobbyzxx I'm a real new Yorker bobby
➛Just doing my part for global warming.
@phillydesign Just doing my part for global warming.
➛I miss it all so much. I cherish my counterfolk.
Sometimes when I'm alone in the house I just say the four...
Sometimes when I'm alone in the house I just say the four words to remember how they sound. "Tomatoeggandcheese onatoastedroll saltandpepper thankyousir."
➛she's very proud of you
cc @ashleyfeinberg
hang_in_there_cat.jpeg
I worked at Harper's from 2005–2010 and remain proud of the...
I worked at Harper's from 2005–2010 and remain proud of the work I did. Today's letter was harmful. It's written so broadly as to seem harmless, but when you see the signatories—some of whom already repudiate it—the logic clears up. It's a dogwhistle in a teapot.
➛I mean it's a jewel. Or maybe more of a rare mineral that...
@sophaskins I mean it's a jewel. Or maybe more of a rare mineral that only true mineral fans love. But wow.
➛Soph...I'm so happy for you.
@sophaskins Soph...I'm so happy for you.
➛By the time this is over our cats will be seeing pet...
By the time this is over our cats will be seeing pet therapists over Zoom.
➛This will sound utterly ridiculous given who I am, what I...
The latest Ubuntu is good, actually.
@clarkkampfe The latest Ubuntu is good, actually.
➛oh god this but downloading TOSEC files from
@cabel oh god this but downloading TOSEC files from archive.org
➛okay but look hear me out there's a reason i needed 64 gigs...
okay but look hear me out there's a reason i needed 64 gigs and 24 cores
1) we may be home until december
2) i need really good video and my laptop is basically melting under the load of constant video
3) i compile emacs when i'm anxious
4) i do a lot of podcasting
1) we may be home until december
2) i need really good video and my laptop is basically melting under the load of constant video
3) i compile emacs when i'm anxious
4) i do a lot of podcasting
We are trying tok but no one has this schedule or logic for...
That was an excellent decision! Good for her and for you.
@sarahsplains That was an excellent decision! Good for her and for you.
➛Ooooof. Two major transitions at once is so hard. We are...
@keithmancuso Ooooof. Two major transitions at once is so hard. We are all going to get through this but in the meantime....
➛hdmi stands for hot damn, movin' images
hdmi stands for hot damn, movin' images
➛Apparently there's a huge shift around eight where taking...
@Scarlet_Foxtrot Apparently there's a huge shift around eight where taking things away doesn't really work any more. It's been something else to learn it.
➛Ooooooooooof. That just sounds hard.
@Scarlet_Foxtrot Ooooooooooof. That just sounds hard.
➛Ooooooof Amir
@Amirmizroch @roblifford Ooooooof Amir
➛Oh yeah. The tantrums are longer for sure.
8yo twins. Social kids.
@roblifford 8yo twins. Social kids.
➛Anyway I know I'm not the only person who is trying to...
Anyway I know I'm not the only person who is trying to de-escalate some argument about going outside for a walk in masks, only to utterly lose my shit when a kid I'm trying to soothe slaps me in the face. The thing I'm trying to remember: They've lost more than we have.
➛The “good” news is that therapy is more accessible over...
The “good” news is that therapy is more accessible over video calls and less disruptive than it used to be, for kids and adults. Still costly, with little insurance support. Still it feels like every month we lose a year of development. And our friends report the same.
➛Parenting small kids through this quarantine is a disaster....
Parenting small kids through this quarantine is a disaster. The kids are regressing, angry, and lonely. Everything I promised myself I wouldn't be as a father I've become. Not looking for sympathy, just saying it out loud because so many other parents are whispering their shame.
➛Looks like mans planing to me.
@pardoguerra Looks like mans planing to me.
➛I'm not it's really good and well-crafted!
@xxbobbyzxx I'm not it's really good and well-crafted!
➛It's really tightly scripted.
@xxbobbyzxx It's really tightly scripted.
➛Like fifteen minutes and then I bailed.
@adamatsya Like fifteen minutes and then I bailed.
➛My dog just started telling me how wolves should run the...
My dog just started telling me how wolves should run the world and I realized he's gotten into the Bark Enlightenment.
➛Sigh.
Wow there's an hour of this huh.
Wow there's an hour of this huh.
➛Tweet
I mean...I hate it. But also @zeynep's predictive tweets...
Also @TaylorLorenz is a very fine journalist who researches...
Also @TaylorLorenz is a very fine journalist who researches her beat relentlessly and treats her subjects with sympathy and respect.
➛A lot of VCs hate what they can't own.
I hate that we are this stupid.
I hate that we are this stupid.
➛Birthday!
@jackrusher @SlackHQ Birthday!
➛but tony i like pictures
@tonygill99 @SlackHQ but tony i like pictures
➛we need more podcasts
@silviakillings @SlackHQ we need more podcasts
➛jinkies
@radiocolin @SlackHQ jinkies
➛on android it's a long press
@silviakillings @SlackHQ on android it's a long press
➛Dear @SlackHQ it would help my hurty eyeballs if I could...
Hahahaha oh god
I know your pain, but can I suggest WeatherKitty?
Like this thing where artists have to CONNECT with FANS and...
Like this thing where artists have to CONNECT with FANS and provide PREMIUM SNUGGLES is clearly a terrible idea.
➛You have a couple drinks and something good comes on and...
You have a couple drinks and something good comes on and you just smash a buck or two in someone's direction.
➛I kind of want a Bandcamp jukebox at a bar where you put in...
I kind of want a Bandcamp jukebox at a bar where you put in a credit card and the money goes straight to the artist. Or a Bluetooth speaker with a big red button that plays Bandcamp streams and when you hit it it pays money to the playing artist.
➛