January 2015 BY Paul Ford 2015 287 Sections thanks omg fuck this this might be the worst pitch i've ever seen nah because every message is personalized and private, and... there is some limit; it's in the docs but a little vague. i... hah trick question no one knows This is awesome. what if a tweet ended the world I'm guessing they are like, doing the bot's voice? Or else... there are like six pages of those theyre the WORST omg also amazing pic glad to know who took it what sport is it tho? a little but i think true errol morris voice is when he... we just all think we're garbage my shrink says it's about ADEQUACY and in 99% of the 7000... i can't share the data but the language is identical from... you should see the signups. we're all exactly the same. i just want to say that this was my greatest tweet it's true they didn't understand so I explained that you were a very... the important thing is that I get 15% scooting, cinnamon apples, hello kitty, leggings,... I would never objectify women like that that was really great and comforting and fun. thank you. thank you you renamed boromir? also u know the edge? From u2? He did 9/11 Im gonna send fewer emails more randomly mailchimp gave me a million emails i would never violate privacy. fun fact: ira wanted me to... hitler was thin it was cool yeah wowthat is a stellar resource for bootstrapping a... gowanus is misspelled omg no I want ken to explain the Internet oof I bent down today and saw lights ACELA: CLINTON'S TRUE LEGACY On December 11, 2000, the... it sounds like you want to know are bots i mean seen another way those are all bots amazingly few sadly ulgh the internet as implemented is basically ironic ben email tho yah that RESTish API is sweetness i hate port 25 with a... thanks! sending! Mark! Now that I understand Mandrill better it is coming... hah no just was looking at a tumblr whoa i genuinely want to see it played she likes pjörk chops is that the end of the story wait ken what sport is this https://twitter.com/ftrain/statu... lots of schools have ironic mascots but that motto is the... you have got to be shitting me hoooooly shit it's Omnia Extares meaning "let it all hang... when she watched sitcoms starring robin Williams and Pam... he co-founded counterpunch so the fact that he's not... i had to do all the HTML by hand. but so worth it. we worked a ton on those tables. good times. My thoughts at the time: “at least it's not Equatorial... that'll double their monthly traffic she gets frustrated when people in the media give men... sjörkin adam hahahahahsha whoa nope she's moving to Njörk! omgyourrite http://www.nytimes.com/video/sports/100000003040466/inside-t... i'll be waiting we had a fiesta ken my wife just came into my office and said, "he's using a... http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jaguar_%28beverage%29 no but really https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/559416460813... also if you read it you'll see that i am being a terrible... oh i'm fine! that's more something i went looking for after... it's for old people Wikipedia is the good 4chan in the same way that Bitcoin is... its cool that spam is a humanist discipline whoa "one of us" if could have been a man's staff recommended by medium's... hello! i will reach out when this comes into focus ad jargon. M is thousand and MM is million. i think about this a lot, like basically everyone is... it's going to be on this american life and i'll get 1K+... well...that's sort of the point of it, this was a one-off... oh i am never going to do more than skim that shit for... transactional--each one a snowflake produced by a bot. AWS... 3,000--it's very high-volume by design but super opt-in it was also, you can only have 500 simultaneous recipients,... alas every email is personalized AND private and looks... not all of us have sexy mailchimp sponsorships nah it'll be fine i'm just scaling wait wait let a man decide how he's going to architect his... why not skip pharma and just go straight to militias and... i think we'll hit the spam wall so fast because... i may ask! i'll see if > 1000 people sign up, and costs... yeah i noticed that trying to get email working on... Cool! Ping ford@ftrain.com? Zero obligation but it'd be... that's bearable. i can do that. that's like $60,000 of sheer emotional pain per moment With yellow feathers in her hair and a dress cut down to... god not you too right but the speed of that is increasing! c.f.... feels like amazon lambda is in this direction Yeah, I mean those costs will always out themselves... But migration costs, one week schedule, labor costs,... VIP is great, I work with people who use it and I like WP. Also I'm pretty sure Greg cost less than VIP. page caching is kind of 2003 tbh compared to heavy write... make sure to tell ken what snapchat is As to better heds: “Jet logs prove link be tween Clinton... ken, you don't have any meetings to cancel wait wait wait you are a true friend I don't think it is fiction tbh yes oh no I brought the fight home yep fixed! You know the restraint that was applied here, the pain that... great suggestion! done i considered the discussion that was going to ensue and... i'm sorry patrick you weren't supposed to know wait who is that he has hair privilege my privilege does the craziest shit the ladies at the daycare send their kids to other daycares it's in my head now you monster patrick the ladies from the islands who are running daycare... I'm not surprised that someone who organizes books by color... see tim the risks are real I will just put it up. No big deal, just need a couple... can't comment so I just look at the page and think things but the REAL bookshelves are behind those right, right... all i'm saying is that this is a high-stakes game and it's... Shouldn't you be working on a unified global platform that... also you are correct I write obituaries for all my friends [LOUD LAUGHTER, TURNS... I'm wearing a hemp onesie embroidered with the name adnan also I don't have any live tv wow you failed that captcha something awful kell...bot perfect tx I have to relaunch anxietybox to deal with all these... I mean it could be that they are trying to do the voice of... i am the king of being stupid about websites well look who decided to come back for a visit andrew I'm reading superintelligence you know what is going to be worse than twitter when Joan... Twitter shani makes the world takes people are wandering in the aisles like a zombie movie my train is like six billion degrees I'm so warm that it... coolio @anxietyboxbot was gonna just spam anyone who wanted... nah it can be whatever, MIT or BSD or wevs. Just put it up... of course i retweet that but i'm late on a deadline i'm learning an unbelievable amount about anxiety i'm worth 1/10,000th regular people you know what these are? [takes out a thumb drive] these... second prize is a set of sushikiri, third prize is you're... Being excluded from opportunity sure makes people lose... nothing i've read online has prepared me for the words... welp time to move on to the next deadline wait they... put the kombucha down kombucha is for people who optimize... god tho glengarry glen ross but remade with VCs My kids are learning to write at nursery school but where... I'm late on four deadlines if you like me hate birds you will really hate this new... they don't care about us laura bush killed someone with a car. Matthew Broderick too. so just want to say, @mandrillapp will be bringing you... so @mandrillapp gave me a million emails/month and i was... http://anxietybox.com cracked 3,000 signups Yes, everyone thinks that. Ken you used WordPress for three years when I edited your... leni If I owned a bar where cool dads could hang and talk about... Once, a person jumped in front of my Acela to commit... The hard part is the title. So far I have the chewlumminati i'm a serial nontrepreneur how do you even win ken you are using a phone or computer to tweet wait my wife went to santa cruz with the banana slugs, like I... Omnia Extares is MUCH, MUCH worse not a MASCOT but a motto does evergreen have a motto? it's like 80,000 pixels tall at full resolution ken i pasted in a link to the article at the web archive... yeah no that's gone away forever oh shit http://web.archive.org/web/20070608012023/http://www... http://harpers.org/blog/2009/10/how-awful-is-richard-cohen-l... richard cohen i mean just like that's so much hate that the screenshot... but don't worry, moore's law suggests that one day... there's so much harassment on http://femfreq.tumblr.com/post... “Somewhere in some wall there was a transmitter sending out... This evocative kicker, thought a columnist, will heal... Maybe today will be the day social media drives a... so how's the liberal media this evening? The last time it snowed like this I wrote this essay:... i tweeted about bitcoin and then realized we can solve two problems. turn off your phone and stop... because you love feist? idea: a bunch of memes of people doing horrifying stuff in... Here's a great thing to read when you're feeling a little... since we'll all be cooped up on monday i hope there will be... This is a fascinating Wikipedia page that is basically... check urbandictionary Also, I'm not broke. I'm just incredibly cheap. doesn't it max at like, 3K emails/day? (I ran into that... I think the conclusion is: SES, maybe with sendy (although... lol that's just an SES wrapper alas but still more in the... “We'll figure out revenue later.” —People who have no money meanwhile I *know* email is a disaster because i tried to... I can probably afford SES if I get MailChimp to sponsor me. oh fuck i'm a moron so http://anxietybox.com is tricky because it's 150-300... like i know 25 and 80 are different ports but the delta is... does anyone know how to send 1.5 million txt emails/mo... i opened semi-official signups on http://anxietybox.com/... ken I need your password and your flip phone this is a great ad until the end, when the mothers should... Lots of scenes where a government e-meter shows that... "molestor investor" has been sitting there for what, a... mile lie club The point is that fatties are actually psychics with secret... Marzipan Attacks So the obesity epidemic is actually the product of the... I have this plot idea that in the 60s the CIA noticed that... can someone start http://nazifacts.kinja.com tx hahahaha but I think I was overreacting “‘It’s her real butt,’ said Hershkovits.”... I miss the 1989-era DPaintIV animation dialogue box, and... I'm trying hard to get more stuff off my hard drive and... I made this silly broken toy http://ftrain.github.io/anim/... in before local cache refresh https://twitter.com/ftrain/sta... It turns out the place is going to send me a tote bag so... guys what if we're dead and this is hell Colgate University has a raaaaaaaaaaaacist Yik Yak:... Dr. King he had a dream/of peace and harmony. P E A C E, P... There is a song about Martin Luther King to the tune of... People who sort books by color are dead-souled monsters who... A genuinely cool feeling is when you wear a pair of... ULGH fuck fuck fuck fuck i was silverstein punch-up for years, how many ways can a... one of the toughest jobs in media je suis freedom fries Every time I go “I need to do more for http://tilde.club”... http://squiggle.city/~paper/ is publishing an amazing... I just got off work I'm waiting for a bus After the plague kills off most of humanity will one... There is one other person on this Ftrain car at 10pm has... I take my work seriously. cool story https://archive.org/details/EdwardR.Murrow-BuchenwaldReport u left your purse on the train at 4th ave stop pls email... Otherwise it's unmanageable. literally every project https://github.com/ftrain/anxietybox... Researchers after announcing that they have derived an... seriously i did that to @choire's inbox It turns out that extremely anxious people are not patient... I'm so liberal I'm raising my children not to see color... “How can you make a joke out of everything?” is a question... guys how do you think this makes me feel do you think it... Its good to be back here on Twitter talking about how my... God I'm so tired of meaningful conversations with close and... I'm here I'm at 25 Corporate Drive. The code for it is available at... I talked about Anxiety Box with @pjvogt.... [ANN] The code for 2001's http://www.ftrain.com/cgi-bin/l_op... You see this watch? [Yeah.] This watch controls my car!... your mom was not ejected properly what sport is this https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/5601852... One signup per minute. https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/559... A real fact is that I am supporting my passion for software... I wrote about the most interesting part of getting Kim... So I made this bot that emailed me a few times a day to... Dark social is just people emailing the words “stop... I'm fine if you hate everything I stand for and want me to... I just tried to hand a woman with a toddler the MetroCard...