Grandfather
Stories about my grandfather, whom I wish was still here.
2000
124 Posts, 1 Link
Then to New York
Coming to the city, and what I found there.
College Years
A gloomy gus amidst the upstate snow.
Middle Youth
What happened when little was happening.
Recent Transactions Among the Tribes
This is how the business section of the newspaper sounds to me. You?
Contagious!
Going to the doctor for the first time in 5 years.
Art Book
The protagonist in denial.
Brass Railing
What we talk about when we look at boats.
Speculation: ReichOS
In which I rip off Phil K. Dick, and ask, indirectly: if the Nazis had won, would we have Linux?
Professional Driver, Closed Course
Sorting through the sounds of words.
Silicon Alley UpdateLosing the Niche: HeyThereNegro.com
What’s the news from New York’s hottest economic zone?
Etymologizer
A mass-etymological breakdown tool that I’d create if I could, but I can’t.
Polysemizer
The mighty Polysemizer, making sure all the words are widely known.
Poetry Scanner
A possible tool to figure out where the accents are.
Box of Ideas for Future Language Toys
Ideas for web projects, stories, or approaches to cultural understanding which I’d love to implement and make available if I had the time, or brains.
Why are Human Beings So Terrible?
Lines stretched from 512 to 718.
Copyright
Herein find containted the official copyright statement of Ftrain.com
Two Parallel Content Planets
With the advent of the web, there appear to be two parallel tracks for the development of content and ideas.
PAC Evil
Jim Hightower encapsulates the horror of big money politics in a few paragraphs.
Thomas Hardy, Roman Ruins, Casterbridge
A section from The Mayor of Casterbridge that summarizes Hardy’s historical vision - a mix of architectural, archeological, and human history, which humans ignore to their ignorant doom or observe to their eternal sadness. The beginning of Chapter 11, typed in from the Penguin Edition.
3 Kinds of Power
From John Kenneth Galbraith’s The Anatomy of Power, Houghton Mifflin, pp. 4-6.
What’s the difference between a liberal and a conservative?
An extremely clear definition, from Booknotes, 1994
Continued Biographic
More on the author.
Paul.Ford
Who has perpetrated this monstrosity?
Lapham, Utopia
A virtuouso lambast of consumption culture from Lewis Lapham.
Strategy Session
Selling shoes through violence, and death.
Addicts
Scanned Image from 1995
Identity
An old logo for my very self, now retired.
SlideShow
Images of Past Projects Gone Wrong
CE Cover
Cover of the Combined Effect Non-magazine, 1996
Boy Painting Self
Image from 1995
Are You Mono Blind?
I have absolutely no recollection why I created this image.
Woman
A sketch from 1997
Mirrored Smut
Image from 1996
Feller
Image from 1996
Boots
Image from 1996
Deaf
Image from 1995
Colors #2
Odd image from 1997
The Black Bitmapped Ribbon
Another project gone and done for.
Initial Thoughts about Narratives
Results of a a brainstorming session.
I’ve been trying to make sense of narrative’s place on the web
A resume of sorts—proof that I’m not just making it all up.
Rub it and Love it
Cookery and love, love, love
Reverse Chronology
Ftrain.com rolling backwards.
Ftrain.com Privacy Statement
Official, certified statement intended for the audience of Ftrain.com.
Literary Aspirations, Confession of
The author comes out of his closet full of books.
Forward Chronology
Ftrain.com rolling forwards.
Documents Indicate...
Ford motor company has damaged my brand equity, so I’m suing. This is, for those who have a little trouble with the concept and have seen fit to send me death threats, a joke.
Table of Contents
This is what Ftrain.com looks like to web-browsing sparrows, as they fly hundreds of feet above a terrain of pure data, wearing tiny virtual-reality helmets tuned to display only alphanumeric characters, and GIF graphics.
About
Ftrain.com is a a collection of interlinked pages, with text, graphics, and links to other digitally encoded media objects.
Theory
Ideas about stories, and narratives. Often vague, due to the author’s stunning ignorance.
Language Machines
Little Tools for Foolish Wordplay.
Stories for the Boxglow
Fictional narratives of varying quality.
Texts
A media memory palace; a place to put oddments and scraps; a notebook of cuts and slices, protected under fair use.
Story
Fun-time word-activities in American English.
Speculations
Various imaginary tales.
Stories about Money and Business
Because that’s where life is lived.
Rhetorica
rhetoricainc.com Oct 11Professor Lanham's snazzy business. Good inspiration for Zairja.
They told stories to reprogram my brain
A non-answer to the question: what is cognitive rhetoric?
much smarter people
Who does this thing?
Truly a Cloud
Each time I check the Web, I expect bombing.
Republican National Convention
I’m trying to unrust my chops, so I wrote down some thoughts on the RNC. It’s hard to connect ideas; I’m struggling with the words.
Explosion on Ftrain
Relaunching the Web site.
Location x 3
Ask an idiot a simple question, and see what happens.
The Staten Island Ferry
For summer days and sweet romance.
Rockefeller Center
Good Morning America.
The Brooklyn Bridge: Below
The spot below the bridge where they shoot the models.
The Brooklyn Bridge: Upon
What is it like upon the Brooklyn Bridge, summarized in two paragraphs?
The First Self-Interview
I took myself out to dinner, and we sat down and he interviewed me.
Bloodlife
In my modern era, love begins with diagnostics.
I promise not to get weirded out if I see smut
Originally I wasn’t going to put anything up, but it seemed almost twisted not to pay off the poor bastards who dealt with the silly decision tree.
Yes, I do
Darn tootin! The rawer the better!
Do you like dirty stories?
An example of a decision tree.
I am not over 18
I am just a young’n.
I work with you or know you in some capacity
And your paycheck is now just a dream.
No, I don’t know you from Adam
And Adam doesn’t know me either.
Independent Sections
Independent sections show up on their own lines, indented, with their blurbs printed right below.
Inline Sections
This is an example of an inline section
No, I definitely do not
And never ask me again!
I am over 18
And I’ve got feathers on my naked parts!
Amiable Chat Down 9th St.
Focusing the narrative on its geographical heart.
Iron-clad Legal Copyright
You don’t own me, although I am another on of your little toys.
Touch
It’s hard to reach out.
Biography of a Full-bore Jackass
Short bio of the author of Ftrain.com, written by OCTAVE9, a computerized expert system
Transit
The end is near.
Lost Weekend
I was just fucking with people here, writing nonsense, talking crazy talk.
Staten Island
Middling writing about a nice day.
Walk with Friend up Clinton St. and Back
I is an intellectual type, when I don’t watch myself. Ah well.
ATM
Tell me what you think, she said.
Cards
Because you should always share how you feel.
If Steven Spielberg Directed Porn
Foolery
Box One
It’s the box, in your brain, that makes you feel these things.
Fred, a Cat
A nice cat, gone.
Puppet Show, early afternoon in a warm October in West Chester, Pennsylvania, 1988
People find it curious that I grew up doing puppetry, but I swear to God it was a pretty normal childhood.
‘Log Frenzy (Abstract)
Gentle suggestions.
b i k e !
I’ve got a bike. You can ride it if you like.
Giant Robot Construction Kit
Technological interlude.
Faith of My Fathers
My faith and the place from which it came.
Paul Ford Re-enters Outside World
Here I come!
Love Lost to the Ylem
Quantum love’s a true bitch.
Moral Futures
How will we approach these thorny problems tomorrow?
The Ftrain Temporary FAQ
Out of ideas, I began writing about Ftrain itself. Bad sign.
My Turing Machine
I made my own Turing Machine. Or perhaps I am a Turing Machine and I’m just looking in the mirror.
Sky Frequency
My personal experience of faith, faith, faith.
4 Poems from the First Lines of the Poems Archived at the Poetry Daily Web Site
Poetry all sliced up, and then put back together.
Microcelebrity
I ain’t famous, but won’t you think I am?
Revolutionaries
Changing the world, just by exhaling copious hot air.
The Subway Diary Guide to Self-Loathing
A guide for getting through those bad days.
Pundits on Fire in Hell
Stop telling me how to think!
My Busy Day
I have so much to do (includes pictures).
Ftrain Special Report: London
Here I am in London....
Notes for an Essay on Microsoft Word
Damn the paperclip to hell.
Amiga 1000
A love letter to a little white box.
Voice of the Future
Thinking ‘puters!
The Mysterious Stain
I was born in Pennsylvania, and my biggest mistake was meeting Paul Ford.
Change of Pace
A fucking nasty day.
Audio
This is me, testing the recording capability on a Linux system, doing an old man’s voice.
Bartleby the Scrivener
A Story of Wall Street. Illustrated with contemporary photographs by Paul Ford.
Interactive Word Machine
Touch the robot.
Passerine Among the Natives
I’m counting minutes as she’s making a documentary.
5 Marketing Catastrophes
All absolutely 100% guaranteed true.
Alumni Register
How’m I doin?
Forthcoming Science Trade Books
What’s coming from the physics and paleontology set?
Thenar Crease
A poorly realized science fiction idea.
2nd Avenue
A half-antidote to spiritual failure.Muddle of desires.
Shame
A horrible event.