Ftrain, by Paul Ford

June 2014

Jun 30, 2014

can u get it here before 7PM?

@leahfinnegan can u get it here before 7PM?
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Jun 30, 2014

because it's controlled by Catholics?

@michelet @tcarmody because it's controlled by Catholics?
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Jun 30, 2014

because it is highly reliant on tourism?

@tcarmody because it is highly reliant on tourism?
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Jun 30, 2014

because the government exists it can test weapons there?

@tcarmody because the government exists it can test weapons there?
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Jun 30, 2014

Imagine the postcards.

Imagine the postcards.
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Jun 30, 2014

Once the occupation is over I think the only moral thing...

Once the occupation is over I think the only moral thing the United States can do is make the uterus the 51st state.
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Jun 30, 2014

The good news is that our bosses will still have access to...

The good news is that our bosses will still have access to contraception.
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Jun 30, 2014

I was surprised to see them list Google+ as a community

@anildash I was surprised to see them list Google+ as a community
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Jun 30, 2014

“Although he saved Arliss from a she-bear, we've decided to...

“Although he saved Arliss from a she-bear, we've decided to bid Old Yeller farewell in order to focus development efforts on his puppies.”
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Jun 30, 2014

“We will shut down Orkut on September 30, 2014.”...

“We will shut down Orkut on September 30, 2014.” en.blog.orkut.com
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Jun 30, 2014

“Some Painfully Learned Facts” is a great section for any...

@jackrusher “Some Painfully Learned Facts” is a great section for any documentation.
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Jun 30, 2014

“Today, Mr. DeVoto owns most of what used to be Coney...

“Today, Mr. DeVoto owns most of what used to be Coney Island.” medium.com/...
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Jun 30, 2014

“Which means that Mermaid Flotilla might be the first...

“Which means that Mermaid Flotilla might be the first farm-to-table-to-farm restaurant in history.” medium.com/...
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Jun 30, 2014

I put together a scrapbook of scenes from New York City...

I put together a scrapbook of scenes from New York City after global warming: medium.com/...
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Jun 30, 2014

It's good but dense. Hmm. A copy of the Whole Earth...

@Austin_Federa It's good but dense. Hmm. A copy of the Whole Earth Catalog. So you can see the proto-new media emerging in the 1960s.
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Jun 30, 2014

That's next but are there any? I'd love to play around.

@jackrusher That's next but are there any? I'd love to play around.
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Jun 30, 2014

Oh man I have a lot of work to do I should see if I can...

Oh man I have a lot of work to do I should see if I can emulate NeXTSTEP.
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Jun 30, 2014

It might seem soon but I've never felt anything so right...

@tcarmody It might seem soon but I've never felt anything so right and clear and neither have 200,000,000 other people.
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Jun 30, 2014

Tricky! But I think advantage They Live because it tries to...

@scarequotes Tricky! But I think advantage They Live because it tries to capture a regular person's experience. Network is about elites.
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Jun 30, 2014

I can't wait until the ceremony in August!

@tcarmody I can't wait until the ceremony in August!
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Jun 30, 2014

Literally every worm person in this Facebook has...

@tcarmody Literally every worm person in this Facebook has relationship status "engaged to a giant desert pyramid known only as ZOLGON."
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Jun 30, 2014

How weird is it that They Live is the most prophetic film...

How weird is it that They Live is the most prophetic film of our time?
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Jun 30, 2014

Is anyone else getting the Facebook where everyone's face...

Is anyone else getting the Facebook where everyone's face is replaced by a fanged worm and the Poke button is just a pic of Dick Cheney?
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Jun 29, 2014

the perfect tweetstorm

@patbits the perfect tweetstorm
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Jun 29, 2014

i would watch this movie

@patbits i would watch this movie
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Jun 29, 2014

that guy seriously loves to engage with brands on kik

@patbits that guy seriously loves to engage with brands on kik
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Jun 29, 2014

it's so good it really is. everyone should see it. i think...

@heathr it's so good it really is. everyone should see it. i think it was on google video rip
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Jun 29, 2014

00002/ that guy knows social media

@patbits 00002/ that guy knows social media
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Jun 29, 2014

well I mean that would just make it ART

@BenRegenspan well I mean that would just make it ART
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Jun 29, 2014

00001/massive tweetstorm comin

00001/massive tweetstorm comin
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Jun 29, 2014

i guess not as ominous as 001/

@heathr i guess not as ominous as 001/
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Jun 29, 2014

heathr this 1/ is ominous

@heathr heathr this 1/ is ominous
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Jun 29, 2014

Guys in 40 years someone will remake Mad Men about product...

Guys in 40 years someone will remake Mad Men about product managers at Facebook.
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Jun 29, 2014

am i some sort of savage who lives in a tree

@heathr am i some sort of savage who lives in a tree
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Jun 29, 2014

why would u even ask me that heathr

@heathr why would u even ask me that heathr
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Jun 29, 2014

But less of one between Disney features on ABC news.

@tomgara But less of one between Disney features on ABC news.
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Jun 29, 2014

You know what, though? Some cavemen were assholes.

@gabrielsnyder You know what, though? Some cavemen were assholes.
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Jun 29, 2014

I went to open my Windows and yell “I'm mad as hell and I'm...

@xor I went to open my Windows and yell “I'm mad as hell and I'm not going to take it any more” but it was installing a service pack.
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Jun 29, 2014

Why isn't “Network” on Netflix?

Why isn't “Network” on Netflix?
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Jun 29, 2014

A lot of advertising/marketing metrics journal of consumer...

@gabrielsnyder A lot of advertising/marketing metrics journal of consumer whoohoo stuff is sdojfhals;df
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Jun 29, 2014

I say this as a person who thinks Facebook is insane and...

I say this as a person who thinks Facebook is insane and who got weirdly and awkwardly not paid money by Facebook for something once.
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Jun 29, 2014

Every single person who is complaining about Facebook...

Every single person who is complaining about Facebook manipulating us has seen Mad Men.
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Jun 29, 2014

The entire brand/advertising industry openly and actively...

The entire brand/advertising industry openly and actively seeks to manipulate your emotions using weird caveperson science.
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Jun 29, 2014

What evil spirit congered up that terrible joke?

@rustyk5 What evil spirit congered up that terrible joke?
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Jun 29, 2014

it truly is stellar. if i ever run a programming team again...

@felixsalmon @alexismadrigal it truly is stellar. if i ever run a programming team again this will be the documentation format.
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Jun 29, 2014

My friend @jackrusher showed it to me as a kind of pure and...

@alexismadrigal My friend @jackrusher showed it to me as a kind of pure and excellent computer science explication. It's great to read.
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Jun 29, 2014

It's Athena and Euripides discussing the requirements for...

@alexismadrigal It's Athena and Euripides discussing the requirements for the Kerberos authentication protocol. en.wikipedia.org/...
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Jun 28, 2014

God imagine how great life would be if web standards had to...

God imagine how great life would be if web standards had to be submitted in this format: web.mit.edu/...
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Jun 28, 2014

I get that. But I also see the fact that the OAuth spec...

@dgouldin I get that. But I also see the fact that the OAuth spec isn't written as a dialogue between Athena and Euripides as a serious bug.
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Jun 28, 2014

It's just a photocopy of this with some cartoons added:...

@dgouldin It's just a photocopy of this with some cartoons added: web.mit.edu/...
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Jun 28, 2014

your story checks out

@ckolderup your story checks out
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Jun 28, 2014

That is what gets you to use that?

@ckolderup That is what gets you to use that?
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Jun 28, 2014

Even when OAuth works it's still OAuth.

Even when OAuth works it's still OAuth.
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Jun 28, 2014

I'm kind of looking forward to the Internet panic that will...

I'm kind of looking forward to the Internet panic that will ensue in 2017, when Buffy the Vampire Slayer turns 20.
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Jun 28, 2014

“Laughing people clambering into the back seat of a mock-up...

“Laughing people clambering into the back seat of a mock-up of the open-topped car in which the aristocrats died.” nytimes.com/...
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Jun 28, 2014

Is THAT the problem, or is the problem is that we might end...

@daveliepmann @jackrusher Is THAT the problem, or is the problem is that we might end up with Ghostbusters II?
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Jun 28, 2014

I'd prefer to eat in silence.

@rustyk5 I'd prefer to eat in silence.
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Jun 28, 2014

People who do NOT sleep train are monsters. OH GOD IT'S SO...

@rustyk5 People who do NOT sleep train are monsters. OH GOD IT'S SO GOOD.
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Jun 28, 2014

Science fact: Having children triggers a hormonal reaction...

Science fact: Having children triggers a hormonal reaction where the only release from stress is telling other parents how to rear children.
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Jun 28, 2014

in my head both of you are singing numa numa

@rustyk5 in my head both of you are singing numa numa
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Jun 28, 2014

But yeah it did kind of work for me without weirdly...

@jackrusher But yeah it did kind of work for me without weirdly crapping out for about 20 years there.
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Jun 28, 2014

I do love having that sense of forward motion in the big...

@jackrusher I do love having that sense of forward motion in the big packages like org. It's fun.
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Jun 28, 2014

Heh. I just switched to your config, and it's actually...

@jackrusher Heh. I just switched to your config, and it's actually comparatively stable/balanced compared to my old hodgepodge.
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Jun 27, 2014

This thing is like REXX from the future http://www.frida.re/

This thing is like REXX from the future frida.re
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Jun 27, 2014

“It’s Greasemonkey for native apps, or, put in more...

“It’s Greasemonkey for native apps, or, put in more technical terms, it’s a dynamic code instrumentation toolkit.” frida.re/...
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Jun 27, 2014

Welcome to summer, a summer of #lovereads.

Welcome to summer, a summer of #lovereads.
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Jun 27, 2014

it was my life for a year at least

@hotdogsladies it was my life for a year at least
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Jun 27, 2014

I had no idea what to write.

@goldman I had no idea what to write.
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Jun 27, 2014

Actually this will be my Medium post for next week. Thank...

@goldman Actually this will be my Medium post for next week. Thank God.
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Jun 27, 2014

Blogs just made it so incredibly easy to try something for...

@goldman Blogs just made it so incredibly easy to try something for five seconds.
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Jun 27, 2014

I liked reading about zines but never really subscribed to...

@goldman I liked reading about zines but never really subscribed to many. Sort of like how I am browsing Netflix and never watching.
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Jun 27, 2014

AND the way they used to do it was via countercultural...

@goldman AND the way they used to do it was via countercultural almanacs: Whole Earth, Book of Lists, etc.
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Jun 27, 2014

...the early zine culture matched up with the early web...

@goldman ...the early zine culture matched up with the early web publishing culture almost exactly. So there was a handoff/continuity.
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Jun 27, 2014

I recently ordered a copy of High Weirdness by Mail and it...

@goldman I recently ordered a copy of High Weirdness by Mail and it was like my brain exploded. EXCEPT...
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Jun 26, 2014

Harper's had T-shirts made that say “Fuck the Internet” on...

Harper's had T-shirts made that say “Fuck the Internet” on the back.
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Jun 26, 2014

“The spirit cat was brownish gray, with stripes on the...

“The spirit cat was brownish gray, with stripes on the side, a male, very insistent.” thebillfold.com/...
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Jun 26, 2014

“...a blog is an animal that is always famished.’”...

“...a blog is an animal that is always famished.’” poynter.org/...
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Jun 26, 2014

“Not every teaching relationship must be formalized—a...

“Not every teaching relationship must be formalized—a mentoring opportunity, a coach, an internship.” @karenmcgrane/pay-it-forward-b5ca623a6b7e" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.com/@karenmcgrane/pay-it-forward-b5ca623a6b7e
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Jun 26, 2014

People are all like ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ and I'm all like ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ.

People are all like ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ and I'm all like ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ.
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Jun 25, 2014

Ultimately it's my responsibility as management to get him...

@JPaskin @laura_june @maureenflaherty Ultimately it's my responsibility as management to get him the resources he needs to succeed.
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Jun 25, 2014

in the post-mortem we determined that we might have had a...

@JPaskin @laura_june in the post-mortem we determined that we might have had a better outcome had he left his diaper on
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Jun 25, 2014

There is absolutely nothing you can make up where a nurse...

There is absolutely nothing you can make up where a nurse can't quintopple it. That's a five-times topping.
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Jun 25, 2014

“You don't have to tell ME about dirigibles filled with...

“You don't have to tell ME about dirigibles filled with human shit crashing into chicken farms.” —Nurses
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Jun 25, 2014

Sometimes in my head I hear nurses darkly chuckling. Pretty...

Sometimes in my head I hear nurses darkly chuckling. Pretty much anything you see in life a nurse can tongue-click at and go, “ACTUALLY...”
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Jun 25, 2014

he sort of...exploded...and then decided to get out of bed,...

@laura_june he sort of...exploded...and then decided to get out of bed, take off his own diaper, and come find me
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Jun 25, 2014

well i mean that's it, you're staring at a jackson pollock...

@johnjcook well i mean that's it, you're staring at a jackson pollock level shitspackling trying not to puke, going “TOTALLY fine, buddy.”
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Jun 25, 2014

the definition of imperative programming is doing the same...

the definition of imperative programming is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results
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Jun 25, 2014

I want to hug both of them.

@jlax I want to hug both of them.
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Jun 25, 2014

Goblessyu moreen (smashes into sofa)

@maureenflaherty Goblessyu moreen (smashes into sofa)
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Jun 25, 2014

I deeply love my son but tonight he got shit on a table,...

I deeply love my son but tonight he got shit on a table, floor, hallway, bathroom, pants, shirt, and my socks. So I deeply love bourbon too.
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Jun 25, 2014

Seger, Nicks, Nelson: An Eternal Golden Braid...

Seger, Nicks, Nelson: An Eternal Golden Braid medium.com/...
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Jun 25, 2014

The way it gives writers and editors money and support is...

@edd @Medium @StevenLevy The way it gives writers and editors money and support is setting a TERRIBLE example for other SF companies.
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Jun 25, 2014

This is what Anil means when he says he's a Prince fan:...

This is what Anil means when he says he's a Prince fan: medium.com/... (also it's just a fantastic piece)
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Jun 25, 2014

Yeah me neither.

Yeah me neither.
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Jun 25, 2014

Remember when you used to be able to tell your own truth...

Remember when you used to be able to tell your own truth from your own experience and people would make sense of it as individuals?
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Jun 25, 2014

I'm going to erase these tweets now because reasons.

I'm going to erase these tweets now because reasons.
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Jun 25, 2014

“I didn’t worry about getting rape threats in the comments...

“I didn’t worry about getting rape threats in the comments either.” medium.com/...
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Jun 25, 2014

“I didn’t worry about my boss finding my blog.”...

“I didn’t worry about my boss finding my blog.” medium.com/...
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Jun 25, 2014

Spotify has made it horribly obvious how many of the...

Spotify has made it horribly obvious how many of the artists I love have Christmas albums. When I see one I think, “divorce is expensive.”
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Jun 25, 2014

that's just from the picture, it could be freaking anything

@silviakillings @joshuatopolsky that's just from the picture, it could be freaking anything
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Jun 25, 2014

“Getting things out of the brains of programmers onto the...

@silviakillings @joshuatopolsky “Getting things out of the brains of programmers onto the web is expensive and hard, this helps.”
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Jun 25, 2014

In NYC everyone already had the breakfast octopus years ago.

In NYC everyone already had the breakfast octopus years ago.
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Jun 25, 2014

In late July an August gets kind of hypersaturated and...

@rustyk5 In late July an August gets kind of hypersaturated and dangerous-feeling and everything goes into slow motion. I kind of enjoy it.
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Jun 25, 2014

This is—not patronizing here—this is nothing.

@rustyk5 This is—not patronizing here—this is nothing.
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Jun 25, 2014

apparently i'm late to this one but HOO DOGGIES

@tjl apparently i'm late to this one but HOO DOGGIES
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Jun 25, 2014

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0g9poWKKpbU is the dream...

youtube.com/... is the dream sequence from the Kristof movie
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Jun 25, 2014

Webrings are great guys but remember how this ends...

Webrings are great guys but remember how this ends salon.com/...
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Jun 25, 2014

At Amazon they call that picture “Engaging with publishers.”

@noahr At Amazon they call that picture “Engaging with publishers.”
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Jun 25, 2014

“He thinks email is a brand-damaging annoyance.”...

“He thinks email is a brand-damaging annoyance.” dmagazine.com/...
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Jun 25, 2014

To be fair, there are other problems.

To be fair, there are other problems.
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Jun 25, 2014

The problem with tech journalism is right there in that...

The problem with tech journalism is right there in that quote. The problem with tech journalism is not enough breakfast octopus.
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Jun 25, 2014

In all fairness, “why are you buying my company” is a good...

In all fairness, “why are you buying my company” is a good question to ask before you sell your company rather than after.
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Jun 25, 2014

“On the creative side, Dave says, the pressure to sell...

“On the creative side, Dave says, the pressure to sell killed the writing.” dmagazine.com/...
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Jun 25, 2014

I MUST HAVE THE BREAKFAST OCTOPUS

I MUST HAVE THE BREAKFAST OCTOPUS
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Jun 25, 2014

Jeff Bezos: “‘You’re the thing I don’t understand, the...

Jeff Bezos: “‘You’re the thing I don’t understand, the thing I’ve never had. I must have the breakfast octopus.’” dmagazine.com/...
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Jun 25, 2014

I imagined actual Wes Anderson-correspondence, like, “Dear...

@jackrusher I imagined actual Wes Anderson-correspondence, like, “Dear L. Calculus, How are you? Backus is here, I must go. Yours, Algol.”
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Jun 25, 2014

To get the work of making things that help things talk to...

@silviakillings To get the work of making things that help things talk to things you build a little thing. We help make little things. $$$
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Jun 24, 2014

Does he have a newsletter?

@rustyk5 Does he have a newsletter?
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Jun 24, 2014

Anyway if you have tons of state and a many-month learning...

Anyway if you have tons of state and a many-month learning curve is your thing, consider ClojureScript.
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Jun 24, 2014

You can isolate components without hacking fake events,...

You can isolate components without hacking fake events, sharing state, or callbacks. “We got a message from Search! Let's open it!”
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Jun 24, 2014

whoosh when core.async works in clojurescript it really,...

whoosh when core.async works in clojurescript it really, really works
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Jun 24, 2014

It's pretty awk but at the same time you guys all share a...

@joeljohnson It's pretty awk but at the same time you guys all share a common source of anguish/income.
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Jun 24, 2014

Like all such membranes it's basically a social construct...

@joeljohnson Like all such membranes it's basically a social construct and popping it is no big deal.
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Jun 24, 2014

Awesome. I mean even as an outsider, yeah, you have a...

@joeljohnson Awesome. I mean even as an outsider, yeah, you have a pretty thin membrane between edit and engineering.
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Jun 24, 2014

Can I take like tiny partial credit for that or was it...

@joeljohnson Can I take like tiny partial credit for that or was it scheduled?
➛
Jun 24, 2014

JOEL WHAT DID YOU DO DON'T DO THAT

@joeld @tealtan JOEL WHAT DID YOU DO DON'T DO THAT
➛
Jun 24, 2014

HIGH FIVE. That's great.

@joeljohnson HIGH FIVE. That's great.
➛
Jun 24, 2014

chris the entire industry was forced to write about bitcoin...

@GlennF @reppep chris the entire industry was forced to write about bitcoin for six months, they came to our houses at gunpoint
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Jun 24, 2014

I swear to god I just came onto twitter for purposes of...

@reppep @GlennF I swear to god I just came onto twitter for purposes of self-promotion. I will now go read up on what Glenn is doing.
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Jun 24, 2014

everything is a cms

@tealtan everything is a cms
➛
Jun 24, 2014

i need a couple people to help me into the trebuchet

@rustyk5 i need a couple people to help me into the trebuchet
➛
Jun 24, 2014

it's a drone powered social CMS that uses the blockchain...

@reppep it's a drone powered social CMS that uses the blockchain for social innovation
➛
Jun 24, 2014

something's going off the roof for sure

@rustyk5 something's going off the roof for sure
➛
Jun 24, 2014

Nah fuck it I have to launch this thing.

Nah fuck it I have to launch this thing.
➛
Jun 24, 2014

God I wish I knew which it will be.

God I wish I knew which it will be.
➛
Jun 24, 2014

I'm either going to launch something fun at @xoxo or I'm...

I'm either going to launch something fun at @xoxo or I'm going to talk about how it's okay to fail to launch something.
➛
Jun 24, 2014

It made me happy to see you offer to spring for...

@joeljohnson It made me happy to see you offer to spring for editor/engineer drinks.
➛
Jun 24, 2014

Joel what is your wolf eating.

@joeljohnson Joel what is your wolf eating.
➛
Jun 24, 2014

Thank you for 20 great years! Effective immediately the...

Thank you for 20 great years! Effective immediately the @ftrain community will be rendered into a thin polymer film and used for parachutes.
➛
Jun 24, 2014

We've always been huge fans of Theandees and we are...

We've always been huge fans of Theandees and we are incredibly excited to be stuffed into their acquivalve. 2014.xoxofest.com
➛
Jun 24, 2014

THE JOURNEY BEGINS! I'm ridiculously excited to announce...

THE JOURNEY BEGINS! I'm ridiculously excited to announce that @ftrain has been acquired by XOXOFest. 2014.xoxofest.com
➛
Jun 24, 2014

The title of my history of the 2010s is “The Age of...

The title of my history of the 2010s is “The Age of Insufferability” and you can pre-order it now from Facegoomazon.
➛
Jun 24, 2014

History is so bad at preserving eyerolls.

History is so bad at preserving eyerolls.
➛
Jun 24, 2014

I just always assumed tentacles.

@leahfinnegan I just always assumed tentacles.
➛
Jun 24, 2014

What's under Scalia's robe?

@leahfinnegan What's under Scalia's robe?
➛
Jun 24, 2014

It is. It's the greatest.

@matt_levine It is. It's the greatest.
➛
Jun 24, 2014

What about Georgie Jessel or Eddie Cantor?

What about Georgie Jessel or Eddie Cantor?
➛
Jun 24, 2014

“For men, sartorial good taste can be reduced to one rule:...

“For men, sartorial good taste can be reduced to one rule: If Fred Astaire would not have worn it, don't wear it.” washingtonpost.com/...
➛
Jun 24, 2014

Is it still sexual assault if she wears jeans?

@leahfinnegan Is it still sexual assault if she wears jeans?
➛
Jun 23, 2014

Typically I'm hard G, but I'm not orthodox. I've used both...

@mep Typically I'm hard G, but I'm not orthodox. I've used both with no shame.
➛
Jun 23, 2014

Unfortunately there isn't a HPAAAAACSTDHASOAO sticker on...

Unfortunately there isn't a HPAAAAACSTDHASOAO sticker on BuzzFeed.
➛
Jun 23, 2014

That was an honest piece about an adult addressing a...

That was an honest piece about an adult addressing a complex situation that didn't have a solution, only an outcome.
➛
Jun 23, 2014

“I didn’t tell many people I was planning on freezing my...

“I didn’t tell many people I was planning on freezing my eggs—it was a private thing, the world didn’t need to know.” buzzfeed.com/...
➛
Jun 23, 2014

Toddler bedtime disasters https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/...

Toddler bedtime disasters twitter.com/...
➛
Jun 22, 2014

i thought u were trying to be a newman

@rustyk5 i thought u were trying to be a newman
➛
Jun 22, 2014

i thought u were done with twitter for the day

@rustyk5 i thought u were done with twitter for the day
➛
Jun 22, 2014

yeah it's stellar and Kapor just kind of wipes the floor

@knowtheory yeah it's stellar and Kapor just kind of wipes the floor
➛
Jun 22, 2014

Airplane never claimed copyright on the COVER, only on the...

@alexismadrigal Airplane never claimed copyright on the COVER, only on the sound recording, so advantage Berkeley. Our legal system: Wut.
➛
Jun 22, 2014

WE BUILT THIS TTY ON MI-CRO-CODE

WE BUILT THIS TTY ON MI-CRO-CODE
➛
Jun 22, 2014

Fun fact: Jefferson Airplane sued Berkeley Systems over...

Fun fact: Jefferson Airplane sued Berkeley Systems over flying toasters archive.wired.com/...
➛
Jun 22, 2014

This thing's gold. When Mt. St. Helens erupted they lost...

This thing's gold. When Mt. St. Helens erupted they lost two days work on the 286 chip because simulators went down. archive.computerhistory.org/...
➛
Jun 22, 2014

I can respect that designing microprocessors in the 1980s...

I can respect that designing microprocessors in the 1980s would send you into the arms of a loving Jesus.
➛
Jun 22, 2014

+10 again to @vitor_io

+10 again to @vitor_io
➛
Jun 22, 2014

The lead designer of the Intel 386, John Crawford: “I...

The lead designer of the Intel 386, John Crawford: “I actually became a Christian as a result of the 386 project.” archive.computerhistory.org/...
➛
Jun 22, 2014

Okay, so Gene Hill was the very religious Intel engineer....

Okay, so Gene Hill was the very religious Intel engineer. He prayed for the 386. archive.computerhistory.org/...
➛
Jun 22, 2014

+10 to @vitor_io for SNIPES

+10 to @vitor_io for SNIPES
➛
Jun 22, 2014

Which co-designer of Intel's 386 microprocessor told Pat...

Which co-designer of Intel's 386 microprocessor told Pat Robertson on The 700 Club that God was responsible for the 386's success?
➛
Jun 22, 2014

Brad, Kevin Fox just stepped up to the judging podium and...

@bradchoate Brad, Kevin Fox just stepped up to the judging podium and handed this to me twitter.com/...
➛
Jun 22, 2014

“Netware, Novell's first PC networking product, featured a...

“Netware, Novell's first PC networking product, featured a bundled game as its demo. What was the game called?”
➛
Jun 22, 2014

+10 @mala for FatBits

+10 @mala for FatBits
➛
Jun 22, 2014

What do you call the feature in MacPaint and Superpaint...

What do you call the feature in MacPaint and Superpaint that lets you enlarge and modify a small portion of a drawing one pixel at a time?
➛
Jun 22, 2014

10 points, Bill.

@billder 10 points, Bill.
➛
Jun 22, 2014

But not as bad as Mitch Kapor kicked Bill Joy's ass at this...

But not as bad as Mitch Kapor kicked Bill Joy's ass at this 1988 Computer Trivia Bowl: youtube.com/...
➛
Jun 22, 2014

Aldus. I'm pretty good at computer trivia history and this...

Aldus. I'm pretty good at computer trivia history and this thing is kicking my ass.
➛
Jun 22, 2014

“The first three companies to get prototypes of Apple's...

“The first three companies to get prototypes of Apple's first LaserWriter were Lotus, Microsoft, and what third company?”
➛
Jun 22, 2014

It's golden ephemera. For example, THE CHANG MODIFICATION...

It's golden ephemera. For example, THE CHANG MODIFICATION #q=%22the+chang+modification%22" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://www.google.com/webhp?sourceid=chrome-instant&ion=1&espv=2&ie=UTF-8#q=%22the+chang+modification%22 “sped up” PC benchmarks by slowing down the machine.
➛
Jun 22, 2014

A PDF of a book of (often insanely) challenging computer...

A PDF of a book of (often insanely) challenging computer trivia. research.microsoft.com/...
➛
Jun 22, 2014

Why is there a giant dog behind this Yahoo! executive in...

Why is there a giant dog behind this Yahoo! executive in the Times? static01.nyt.com/...
➛
Jun 22, 2014

Tichy, Heckel, same diff.

Tichy, Heckel, same diff.
➛
Jun 22, 2014

“Ms. Naumann knows the pigeon was female because, once the...

“Ms. Naumann knows the pigeon was female because, once the eagles ripped it open, they discovered an egg inside.” opinionator.blogs.nytimes.com/...
➛
Jun 20, 2014

RIP. http://Freshmeat.net was great in the early days....

RIP. freshmeat.net was great in the early days. There's still no software firehose like it.
➛
Jun 20, 2014

“That is the only time I recall driving a major decision at...

“That is the only time I recall driving a major decision at VA, but it was enough to earn my stock options.” #comments" target="_blank" rel="noopener">http://jeffcovey.net/2014/06/19/freshmeat-net-1997-2014/comment-page-1/#comments
➛
Jun 20, 2014

condé nast was the first to put it in everywhere

@rustyk5 @anildash condé nast was the first to put it in everywhere
➛
Jun 20, 2014

pretty standard for media contracts actually

@rustyk5 @anildash pretty standard for media contracts actually
➛
Jun 20, 2014

Just until the BI merger is done and then my contract...

@rustyk5 Just until the BI merger is done and then my contract requires I commit ritual suicide.
➛
Jun 20, 2014

“There, her plaque hangs alongside those of innovators like...

“There, her plaque hangs alongside those of innovators like Earl Tupper, the creator of Tupperware.” nytimes.com/...
➛
Jun 20, 2014

“The research that led to Kevlar began in the early 1960s,...

“The research that led to Kevlar began in the early 1960s, when women were a rarity in industrial chemistry.” nytimes.com/...
➛
Jun 20, 2014

Peter the web's getting old. We're all gray-haired, or...

@peterme @pmarca Peter the web's getting old. We're all gray-haired, or bald, or chubby, or leading product teams.
➛
Jun 20, 2014

man is that the truth.

@vgr man is that the truth.
➛
Jun 20, 2014

“His tweetstorms are designed to attract the other true...

“His tweetstorms are designed to attract the other true believers, and there are plenty of them around.” businessweek.com/...
➛
Jun 20, 2014

its one thing to hear it but another thing to truly feel it

@rustyk5 its one thing to hear it but another thing to truly feel it
➛
Jun 20, 2014

Jesus what if he's right.

Jesus what if he's right.
➛
Jun 20, 2014

My piece which I wrote criticizing Kinja has 5,000+ views....

My piece which I wrote criticizing Kinja has 5,000+ views. This validates the Kinja platform strategy. I feel weird.
➛
Jun 20, 2014

And I replied to Ben: http://paulford.kinja.com/hey-ben-i-lo...

And I replied to Ben: paulford.kinja.com/...
➛
Jun 20, 2014

Let's start with The Loop.

@helenhousandi Let's start with The Loop.
➛
Jun 20, 2014

a) i respect where DJ is coming from b) i am super-glad it...

@BenRegenspan @djacobs @beep @thejefflarson a) i respect where DJ is coming from b) i am super-glad it was useful & happy to test in future
➛
Jun 20, 2014

“The cruelest joke, though, was that 700 to 800 copies made...

“The cruelest joke, though, was that 700 to 800 copies made ‘Boom’ a top-rated seller.” nytimes.com/...
➛
Jun 20, 2014

Okay well thanks for taking time out from work. HUGE...

@djacobs Okay well thanks for taking time out from work. HUGE fucking eye roll.
➛
Jun 20, 2014

I own some of of that. It's a fair criticism. I don't have...

@djacobs I own some of of that. It's a fair criticism. I don't have that much influence, IMO, & I'm hearing this from you, not from Gawker.
➛
Jun 20, 2014

“‘I've never seen you without vitiligo, and so it's like,...

“‘I've never seen you without vitiligo, and so it's like, that's normal. That's my dad.’” npr.org/...
➛
Jun 20, 2014

can't tell GAWKER how I honestly felt working with its...

@djacobs @thejefflarson @beep can't tell GAWKER how I honestly felt working with its public software then I basically give up.
➛
Jun 20, 2014

but basically: an editor invited me to use it and I did and...

@djacobs @thejefflarson @beep but basically: an editor invited me to use it and I did and as I played around that's my reaction and if I--
➛
Jun 20, 2014

eh. it's public heavily promoted software and i pointed out...

@djacobs @thejefflarson @beep eh. it's public heavily promoted software and i pointed out that product direction is the issue.
➛
Jun 20, 2014

(3) then it was shared on twitter by other folks, not me....

@djacobs @thejefflarson @beep (3) then it was shared on twitter by other folks, not me. so i tweeted it out.
➛
Jun 20, 2014

(1) an editor asked me to comment using kinja yesterday;...

@djacobs @thejefflarson @beep (1) an editor asked me to comment using kinja yesterday; (2) i played around and wrote that piece.
➛
Jun 20, 2014

I am hopeful that one day in the future people who make...

I am hopeful that one day in the future people who make comments online will assume control of the world and we will live under snarkarchy.
➛
Jun 20, 2014

my first thought is what does a kickstarter smell like? (my...

@eaton @katienotopoulos @karenmcgrane my first thought is what does a kickstarter smell like? (my second thought: it smells like etsy)
➛
Jun 20, 2014

Got the kids dressed, got a cup of coffee, and figured I'd...

Got the kids dressed, got a cup of coffee, and figured I'd poke around Kinja because who doesn't love CMSes? paulford.kinja.com/...
➛
Jun 20, 2014

My actual genuine first thought: “I'd have to see a...

@katienotopoulos My actual genuine first thought: “I'd have to see a personal stylist and they would insist on vertically-striped shirts.”
➛
Jun 19, 2014

life used to be so simple

@rustyk5 life used to be so simple
➛
Jun 19, 2014

i think there was a usenet group dedicated to cyberhugs

@rustyk5 i think there was a usenet group dedicated to cyberhugs
➛
Jun 19, 2014

sending you e-cyberhugs

@rustyk5 sending you e-cyberhugs
➛
Jun 19, 2014

are you moaning about the fact that we are about to return...

@rustyk5 are you moaning about the fact that we are about to return to war in the middle east or some bullshit on medium
➛
Jun 19, 2014

SO POSSIBLE but also that is a pretty great website

@Heather_R SO POSSIBLE but also that is a pretty great website
➛
Jun 19, 2014

You could spend an entire year just reading essays about...

You could spend an entire year just reading essays about the fate of reading in the age of distractions.
➛
Jun 19, 2014

As part of a long-term effort to bridge the cultures of San...

As part of a long-term effort to bridge the cultures of San Francisco and New York City, I just gave a product demo to my therapist.
➛
Jun 19, 2014

As epitaphs go “built a teenage girl named Olivia Taters...

As epitaphs go “built a teenage girl named Olivia Taters who lives on the Internet” is pretty sweet.
➛
Jun 19, 2014

“Rob Dubbin accidentally built a teenage girl named Olivia...

“Rob Dubbin accidentally built a teenage girl named Olivia Taters who lives on the internet.” onthemedia.org/...
➛
Jun 18, 2014

you can actually see promising careers drift away by...

@rustyk5 you can actually see promising careers drift away by googling "author name" "housing works" #q=%22paul+ford%22+%22housing+works%22" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://www.google.com/webhp?sourceid=chrome-instant&ion=1&espv=2&ie=UTF-8#q=%22paul+ford%22+%22housing+works%22
➛
Jun 18, 2014

you're welcome, son

@mslopatto you're welcome, son
➛
Jun 18, 2014

the east river is littorally a tidal strait

the east river is littorally a tidal strait
➛
Jun 18, 2014

you seem anxious do you need a backrub

@RachelFersh @rustyk5 you seem anxious do you need a backrub
➛
Jun 18, 2014

it is LITERARILY the only place left for that kind of event...

@rustyk5 it is LITERARILY the only place left for that kind of event in Manhattan
➛
Jun 18, 2014

Gmail search shows “garbage-monster,” April 25, Today in...

@RachelFersh @rustyk5 Gmail search shows “garbage-monster,” April 25, Today in Tabs.
➛
Jun 18, 2014

you may be the only person i know who isn't slightly...

@rustyk5 you may be the only person i know who isn't slightly depressed that something is at housing works
➛
Jun 18, 2014

you have to sit in the ally balcony

@rustyk5 you have to sit in the ally balcony
➛
Jun 18, 2014

no seriously what the fuck is up with this source code

@harrisj @donohoe @NewYorker no seriously what the fuck is up with this source code
➛
Jun 18, 2014

hahah i've viewed source on the times before you can only...

@donohoe @harrisj hahah i've viewed source on the times before you can only play that prank once michael
➛
Jun 18, 2014

where's the ball where's the ball sign up for times premier...

@harrisj where's the ball where's the ball sign up for times premier where's the ball
➛
Jun 18, 2014

god are women even waxing their poetry now

@JessicaKRoy @rustyk5 god are women even waxing their poetry now
➛
Jun 18, 2014

the nytimes literally thinks we are dogs

@harrisj the nytimes literally thinks we are dogs
➛
Jun 18, 2014

who can even hear them with their peep peep voices

@rustyk5 who can even hear them with their peep peep voices
➛
Jun 18, 2014

wait wait wait wait wait @harrisj did u spot the ball

wait wait wait wait wait @harrisj did u spot the ball
➛
Jun 18, 2014

Oh shit you are going to really hate heaven.

@harrisj Oh shit you are going to really hate heaven.
➛
Jun 18, 2014

It was nice to meet you! PepperGoldBondTesla389r4 out.

@harrisj It was nice to meet you! PepperGoldBondTesla389r4 out.
➛
Jun 18, 2014

I am so sorry Jacob but I must destroy you within the next...

@harrisj I am so sorry Jacob but I must destroy you within the next 30 seconds. It is the law since the Pepsicaust.
➛
Jun 18, 2014

My distant 30x great-grandfather was Diet Dr. Pepper. Did...

@harrisj My distant 30x great-grandfather was Diet Dr. Pepper. Did you know him?
➛
Jun 18, 2014

You were asleep for 240,000 years during which the universe...

@harrisj You were asleep for 240,000 years during which the universe was populated entirely by self-aware brands. We are so glad to see you!
➛
Jun 18, 2014

President Brand and Brand Senate appreciate your loyalty...

@harrisj President Brand and Brand Senate appreciate your loyalty with Loyalty Points.
➛
Jun 18, 2014

on the plus we fixed your hammertoe. on the downside the...

@harrisj on the plus we fixed your hammertoe. on the downside the only music NASA could get interstellar rights for is Riptide by Vance Joy.
➛
Jun 18, 2014

right, because of the space beams, but you can do a ton...

@harrisj right, because of the space beams, but you can do a ton with eight bits!
➛
Jun 18, 2014

but the good news is when you get the centauri you will...

@harrisj but the good news is when you get the centauri you will still be a programmer!
➛
Jun 18, 2014

no i know it feels that way but it's your brain signaling...

@harrisj no i know it feels that way but it's your brain signaling distress as we use microdrones to reverse what the centrifuge did to you
➛
Jun 18, 2014

actually you are on a ship to Centauri and this Twitter...

@harrisj actually you are on a ship to Centauri and this Twitter emulator is the only form of communication that doesn't disturb your stasis
➛
Jun 18, 2014

busy day right?

@harrisj busy day right?
➛
Jun 18, 2014

The new Amazon phone tracks faces, and you might not know...

The new Amazon phone tracks faces, and you might not know why it matters today but wait until we unveil our mandatory breeding program!
➛
Jun 18, 2014

that's a GREAT app

@anildash that's a GREAT app
➛
Jun 18, 2014

it switches me all the time because the wifi is out at the...

@leahfinnegan it switches me all the time because the wifi is out at the office so i use optimum, i love it.
➛
Jun 18, 2014

look i'm not clear on the pikettycoin specifics but i'm...

look i'm not clear on the pikettycoin specifics but i'm willing to invest a ton of fedoracoins in whoever can code it fedoraco.in
➛
Jun 18, 2014

i'm guessing pikettycoins would start with a trillion...

i'm guessing pikettycoins would start with a trillion piketties and over the course of time they would merge them into a giant pikettyblock
➛
Jun 18, 2014

has anyone made pikettycoins yet

has anyone made pikettycoins yet
➛
Jun 18, 2014

i never thought i'd yearn for the days when people...

i never thought i'd yearn for the days when people discussed bitcoin
➛
Jun 18, 2014

“Did I miss 1of Asimov’s Laws that says androids are always...

“Did I miss 1of Asimov’s Laws that says androids are always programmed to be more socially-minded than neoliberals?” al3x.net/...
➛
Jun 18, 2014

we'll just take it a day at a time

@lauraolin we'll just take it a day at a time
➛
Jun 18, 2014

Four years is just long enough, isn't it? That's how they...

@lauraolin Four years is just long enough, isn't it? That's how they get us.
➛
Jun 18, 2014

Yeah you got to run a pretty classy game all told but 2016...

@lauraolin Yeah you got to run a pretty classy game all told but 2016 is gonna be...hoo doggies. Would you go back for more?
➛
Jun 18, 2014

a movie about a man who can't remember what happens when he...

a movie about a man who can't remember what happens when he drinks martinis it's called pimento
➛
Jun 18, 2014

Goodnight everyone. I hope you enjoyed our program. Here's...

Goodnight everyone. I hope you enjoyed our program. Here's an hour and sixteen minutes of Umm Kulthum to see us out. youtube.com/...
➛
Jun 18, 2014

i'll angel invest

@tcarmody i'll angel invest
➛
Jun 18, 2014

second of all i don't sade eats food like i bet she SAYS...

@tasneemraja second of all i don't sade eats food like i bet she SAYS she eats food but her body actually is trained to survive on sax solos
➛
Jun 18, 2014

first of all enya never leaves her castle unless it's to...

@tasneemraja first of all enya never leaves her castle unless it's to sing the elven anthem at elf soccer games
➛
Jun 18, 2014

u no i will listen

@anildash u no i will listen
➛
Jun 18, 2014

oh god they are GARBAGE compared

@tasneemraja oh god they are GARBAGE compared
➛
Jun 18, 2014

i am always there for cool cool sax. also i will be frank i...

@anildash i am always there for cool cool sax. also i will be frank i tuned out after urban hang suite, my problem not anyone else's.
➛
Jun 18, 2014

my twitter feed is the weltanschauung jim we know that

@jimray my twitter feed is the weltanschauung jim we know that
➛
Jun 18, 2014

all good jim. i have this essay that's supposed to be 3,000...

@jimray all good jim. i have this essay that's supposed to be 3,000 words and just made it to 12,000 words, so i'm sort of in the weeds.
➛
Jun 18, 2014

i can imagine everything but the footwear. i expect her to...

@tasneemraja i can imagine everything but the footwear. i expect her to be barefoot but maybe i'm wrong.
➛
Jun 18, 2014

How great are moments where people show up unexpectedly?...

How great are moments where people show up unexpectedly? Like in the Third Man. Or Alex Chilton and Gibby Haynes.
➛
Jun 18, 2014

its name is Nalubaale

@tasneemraja its name is Nalubaale
➛
Jun 18, 2014

god imagine her handwriting

@tasneemraja god imagine her handwriting
➛
Jun 18, 2014

“‘I'm Alex Chilton,’ the man answered calmly.”...

“‘I'm Alex Chilton,’ the man answered calmly.” poormojo.org/...
➛
Jun 18, 2014

nearly out of drinking tho

@halvorson nearly out of drinking tho
➛
Jun 18, 2014

like i don't know if this is real but she's always looking...

@tasneemraja like i don't know if this is real but she's always looking to her left off to the middle distance in my mind
➛
Jun 18, 2014

honestly i'll take it

@vruba honestly i'll take it
➛
Jun 18, 2014

Working hard on Sweetback puns here, except Soldier of Love...

Working hard on Sweetback puns here, except Soldier of Love made it clear that Sade truly has a sweet back, so it's sort of already there.
➛
Jun 18, 2014

ULGH honestly should we just start a marketing firm with Al...

@anildash ULGH honestly should we just start a marketing firm with Al Rotches and call it a day?
➛
Jun 18, 2014

Which candidate will Grumpy Cat endorse in 2016? Who will...

Which candidate will Grumpy Cat endorse in 2016? Who will the ghost of Lil Bub endorse in 2016? I ask now so you can prepare yourselves.
➛
Jun 17, 2014

Seriously go to Sade on Spotify and look at related artists...

Seriously go to Sade on Spotify and look at related artists and then throw your laptop out the window because oh wait Bill Withers.
➛
Jun 17, 2014

the world is worth saving

@anildash the world is worth saving
➛
Jun 17, 2014

no but i'm so glad to see you refer to them as their

@anildash no but i'm so glad to see you refer to them as their
➛
Jun 17, 2014

charlie please save civilization it's important

@vruba charlie please save civilization it's important
➛
Jun 17, 2014

Everything in “new” media has been designed so that content...

Everything in “new” media has been designed so that content can metastasize into giant social-spreading anim-GIF cluster bombs.
➛
Jun 17, 2014

It was pretty bad in 2012. But 2016 will be like the...

It was pretty bad in 2012. But 2016 will be like the refined 28-days-later zombie virus bad, content-wise. Rampant industrialized memes.
➛
Jun 17, 2014

I'm having trouble processing what happens when the new...

I'm having trouble processing what happens when the new viral + volume traffic-driven media platforms meet a presidential election.
➛
Jun 17, 2014

i'm just tying flash drives to balloons it's more likely to...

@halvorson @dansinker i'm just tying flash drives to balloons it's more likely to reach someone who cares
➛
Jun 17, 2014

oh god robert it's bedtime

@eagereyes oh god robert it's bedtime
➛
Jun 17, 2014

Wherever Sade is I hope there are white curtains billowing.

Wherever Sade is I hope there are white curtains billowing.
➛
Jun 17, 2014

thank you patrick

@patbits thank you patrick
➛
Jun 17, 2014

I know I made that Sade joke on Twitter four years ago and...

I know I made that Sade joke on Twitter four years ago and I think it holds up, even if it's never as good as the first time.
➛
Jun 17, 2014

One sign of getting older is when you listen to Sade and...

One sign of getting older is when you listen to Sade and think “I should probably switch to unsweetened taboo.”
➛
Jun 17, 2014

Is it a sign that you are getting older when you start to...

Is it a sign that you are getting older when you start to see the world as things that are not and things that are Sade?
➛
Jun 17, 2014

you know the people at ESPN are watching burrito posts fly...

@waxpancake you know the people at ESPN are watching burrito posts fly by with a 2016 desk calendar whispering "THE P IN ESPN IS FOR PAYDAY"
➛
Jun 17, 2014

people are all like my startup has 20k angel investment...

people are all like my startup has 20k angel investment valuing us at 20 million and i'm like fuck you you weren't in the smiths
➛
Jun 17, 2014

“When they created explainer web-sites,” said our...

“When they created explainer web-sites,” said our Professor, seated on his crystal hoverchair, “no one expected them to become self-aware.”
➛
Jun 17, 2014

Anil I'm freaking out, it's like they erase a whole year...

@anildash Anil I'm freaking out, it's like they erase a whole year from the national consciousness every year, like we're all in Memento.
➛
Jun 17, 2014

I have a hilarious idea for TINYWEB in an essay that just...

@dansinker @ryanpitts I have a hilarious idea for TINYWEB in an essay that just got killed by Wired. I will publish it somewhere else soon.
➛
Jun 17, 2014

Facebook is going to make an absolute mint off of political...

Facebook is going to make an absolute mint off of political advertising BUT it will be turned into trash by advocacy sharing.
➛
Jun 17, 2014

Oh I have ideas for a minimal Little Internet!

@dansinker Oh I have ideas for a minimal Little Internet!
➛
Jun 17, 2014

Can you imagine what will happen when Upworthy has a...

Can you imagine what will happen when Upworthy has a presidential election to virally influence?
➛
Jun 17, 2014

No we're okay, I was off by a year. We have until January...

No we're okay, I was off by a year. We have until January 2016 before the Internet turns into a festering nightmare. en.wikipedia.org/...
➛
Jun 17, 2014

Oh wait, duh, 2016.

Oh wait, duh, 2016.
➛
Jun 17, 2014

I'm predicting the entire English-language Internet will be...

I'm predicting the entire English-language Internet will be unbelievably terrible from January–November 2015.
➛
Jun 17, 2014

some must die so that all might live

@jerrykuch some must die so that all might live
➛
Jun 17, 2014

certainly we can come up with a bayesian model for...

@harper certainly we can come up with a bayesian model for insufferability
➛
Jun 17, 2014

You could fix comments by troll-caving any comment with the...

You could fix comments by troll-caving any comment with the word “liberal” in it.
➛
Jun 17, 2014

dammit hall don't science this

@mulegirl dammit hall don't science this
➛
Jun 17, 2014

for a sec i thought you were talking about fondant

@jerrykuch for a sec i thought you were talking about fondant
➛
Jun 17, 2014

“‘Sykes-Picot is dead,’ Walid Jumblatt roared at me last...

“‘Sykes-Picot is dead,’ Walid Jumblatt roared at me last night – and he may well be right.” independent.co.uk/...
➛
Jun 17, 2014

ah well. facebook story about our wedding cake. summary:...

@katiebakes @EmilyGould ah well. facebook story about our wedding cake. summary: cakes matter.
➛
Jun 17, 2014

wait is a cake vendor different from a baker?

@EmilyGould @katiebakes wait is a cake vendor different from a baker?
➛
Jun 17, 2014

someone should make them a mod

@nelson someone should make them a mod
➛
Jun 17, 2014

katie who books a cake vendor

@katiebakes katie who books a cake vendor
➛
Jun 17, 2014

Seriously who in history went “this cake is moist and great...

Seriously who in history went “this cake is moist and great but it needs a unchewable quarter-inch layer of clay on top.”
➛
Jun 17, 2014

One thing both liberals AND fascists can agree on is that...

One thing both liberals AND fascists can agree on is that fondant is the worst.
➛
Jun 17, 2014

can I just look at pretty cakes on the internet without...

can I just look at pretty cakes on the internet without reading the comments and being disappointed in the way that people handle situations
➛
Jun 17, 2014

“Maybe the cake doesn't expand, but does it really weigh...

“Maybe the cake doesn't expand, but does it really weigh more when frozen?”
➛
Jun 17, 2014

“You must enjoy being a perfect know it all bitch/bully.”...

“You must enjoy being a perfect know it all bitch/bully.” The question was about freezing rainbow cakes.
➛
Jun 17, 2014

“All these bubble parents I have four boys and they won't...

“All these bubble parents I have four boys and they won't cry when they loose”
➛
Jun 17, 2014

For real I've read a lot of comment threads in my time and...

For real I've read a lot of comment threads in my time and this is a perfect example of the form fox.com.au/...
➛
Jun 17, 2014

It also gets into parenting styles, it's amazing.

@matthewbaldwin It also gets into parenting styles, it's amazing.
➛
Jun 17, 2014

Comments on a child's birthday cake IMMEDIATELY devolve...

Comments on a child's birthday cake IMMEDIATELY devolve into total political ragefest shitstorm fox.com.au/...
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Jun 17, 2014

this eden of clowns

this eden of clowns
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Jun 17, 2014

“Here in this Eden of clowns” http://www.monadnock.net/menck...

“Here in this Eden of clowns” monadnock.net/...
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Jun 17, 2014

“The United States, to my eye, is incomparably the greatest...

“The United States, to my eye, is incomparably the greatest show on earth.” monadnock.net/...
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Jun 17, 2014

Does anyone HAVE the forsaken Github “meritocracy” rug?...

Does anyone HAVE the forsaken Github “meritocracy” rug? It's an important artifact and should be preserved for history.
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Jun 17, 2014

yeah that technology is light years beyond where it used to...

@rustyk5 yeah that technology is light years beyond where it used to be
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Jun 17, 2014

Rusty Twitter thinks this tweet is in Romanian....

@rustyk5 Rusty Twitter thinks this tweet is in Romanian. twitter.com/...
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Jun 17, 2014

“Open thy mouth for the dumb in the cause of all such as...

“Open thy mouth for the dumb in the cause of all such as are appointed to destruction” is a Bible verse that applies to the media & giraffes
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Jun 17, 2014

Sort of? This is a feature that makes perfect sense for...

@tophtucker Sort of? This is a feature that makes perfect sense for Alpha but lots of IDEs and editors have variants.
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Jun 16, 2014

“Let's hear it for friends with boats!” cried @rustyk5 as...

“Let's hear it for friends with boats!” cried @rustyk5 as the Kommissar nodded to the five men with rifles pointed.
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Jun 16, 2014

if you learn to code you'll be disappointed you'll be all...

@RachelFersh @gabrielroth @rustyk5 if you learn to code you'll be disappointed you'll be all THIS is what you've been patronizing me over?
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Jun 16, 2014

yes the reference is transparent but it's not REFERENTIALLY...

@gabrielroth @RachelFersh @rustyk5 yes the reference is transparent but it's not REFERENTIALLY transparent someone come to my apartment kill
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Jun 16, 2014

I'm editing a piece and I just found the part where I...

I'm editing a piece and I just found the part where I wrote, “Rover is an object of class Dog and good for him.”
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Jun 16, 2014

you're just getting started

@rustyk5 you're just getting started
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Jun 16, 2014

it's the actual writer cutoff. they give you to young...

@rustyk5 it's the actual writer cutoff. they give you to young editors who don't care and you're cranky and your friends don't care.
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Jun 16, 2014

I figure part of being a professional is letting your...

I figure part of being a professional is letting your younger self remind your older self to hang up the towel.
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Jun 16, 2014

I have a note for myself at age 70 in Google calendar that...

I have a note for myself at age 70 in Google calendar that reads “be REALLY careful about publishing your opinions from here out.”
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Jun 16, 2014

Consider the supposed inner-city epidemic of murder, a.k.a....

Consider the supposed inner-city epidemic of murder, a.k.a. “angry killing.”
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Jun 16, 2014

to be fair who reads him when he's not writing rapologetics?

@rustyk5 @JPaskin to be fair who reads him when he's not writing rapologetics?
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Jun 16, 2014

Q4 2015 is when the Handmaids model comes out

@RachelFersh Q4 2015 is when the Handmaids model comes out
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Jun 16, 2014

I'm not saying he shouldn't have WRITTEN that sentence,...

I'm not saying he shouldn't have WRITTEN that sentence, just that a humane editor should have mercy-killed that sentence. Or its author.
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Jun 16, 2014

My Amazon Phone will arrive and I will load the Washington...

My Amazon Phone will arrive and I will load the Washington Post on it and read assault apologetics from George Will. #synergy
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Jun 16, 2014

“Consider the supposed campus epidemic of rape, a.k.a....

“Consider the supposed campus epidemic of rape, a.k.a. ‘sexual assault.’” washingtonpost.com/... is a sentence that NEVER should happen.
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Jun 16, 2014

Sometimes I wonder what Mr. Basil E. Frankweiler did for a...

Sometimes I wonder what Mr. Basil E. Frankweiler did for a living.
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Jun 16, 2014

summer is going to be so great

@leahfinnegan summer is going to be so great
➛
Jun 16, 2014

http://www.amazon.com/Line-Sand-Anglo-French-Struggle-1914-1...

@craniac amazon.com/... recommended as very good
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Jun 16, 2014

“Then we enter the era in economic history—” the professor...

“Then we enter the era in economic history—” the professor took a long sip of nano-air from his rebreather—“known as the Great Fuckening.”
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Jun 16, 2014

that was Pierre Teilhard de Chardin but it might as well be...

that was Pierre Teilhard de Chardin but it might as well be Jeff Bezos
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Jun 16, 2014

You will find yourselves united with all those who, from...

You will find yourselves united with all those who, from every direction, have made the same ascent. For everything that rises must converge
➛
Jun 16, 2014

i bought cat food and a book about middle eastern...

i bought cat food and a book about middle eastern colonialism from amazon today everything that rises must converge
➛
Jun 15, 2014

i mean, they sort of are *exactly* like that

@shabbychef i mean, they sort of are *exactly* like that
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Jun 15, 2014

i sure would

i sure would
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Jun 15, 2014

“‘I think you’ll agree that the world is a better place...

“‘I think you’ll agree that the world is a better place when things are a little bit different,’ Mr. Bezos wrote.” nytimes.com/...
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Jun 15, 2014

no that means it's working

@phooky @Twylo no that means it's working
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Jun 15, 2014

I've spent more time running TempleOS than I want to admit.

@Twylo @phooky I've spent more time running TempleOS than I want to admit.
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Jun 15, 2014

Video of a fun/weird toy OS http://vimeo.com/75312418

Video of a fun/weird toy OS vimeo.com/...
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Jun 15, 2014

“"Then he said: 'Mosul will be an inferno this week'.'”...

“"Then he said: 'Mosul will be an inferno this week'.'” theguardian.com/...
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Jun 15, 2014

Incredibles: Making everyone super. Avengers: Enslaving...

@vruba @tcarmody Incredibles: Making everyone super. Avengers: Enslaving humanity. Captain America Winter soldier: Destroying anyone weird.
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Jun 15, 2014

right! combined with a rhetoric of inevitability that...

@tcarmody @vruba right! combined with a rhetoric of inevitability that attends to people from places with endless sunny days
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Jun 15, 2014

i love his notes on startups where he's repeatedly using...

@tcarmody @vruba i love his notes on startups where he's repeatedly using 4-quadrant charts and saying "clearly cannibalism is inevitable."
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Jun 15, 2014

i mean sometimes i just wish i could live in their brains...

@patbits i mean sometimes i just wish i could live in their brains for a while, it seems so much fun
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Jun 15, 2014

these people need help constructing a nanoshield...

these people need help constructing a nanoshield lifeboat.com/...
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Jun 15, 2014

I love this kind of thought experiment, tho. LOVE. There's...

@anecdoted I love this kind of thought experiment, tho. LOVE. There's also this: infoq.com/...
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Jun 15, 2014

Oh here's the guy who started the Atlantis Institute is up...

Oh here's the guy who started the Atlantis Institute is up to this now lifeboat.com/...
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Jun 15, 2014

Wait wait wait it's right here in plain site,...

Wait wait wait it's right here in plain site, oceania.org THE ATLANTIS PROJECT
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Jun 15, 2014

The old one has vanished utterly—I signed up from some...

@vruba The old one has vanished utterly—I signed up from some random FAQ, and got a printed newsletter in the early 90s. Sad when it closed.
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Jun 15, 2014

Or, like, useful Unix image-processing libraries.

@mala Or, like, useful Unix image-processing libraries.
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Jun 15, 2014

i think for me that's the best part. you see it in peter...

@sebinsua @ddt i think for me that's the best part. you see it in peter thiel's startup notes too. radical and completely self-assured.
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Jun 15, 2014

Wait wait wait there's a NEW Seasteading Institute? What...

Wait wait wait there's a NEW Seasteading Institute? What happened to the old one with Oceania etc?
➛
Jun 15, 2014

I basically love any thought-system that ends in...

I basically love any thought-system that ends in seasteading monarchies.
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Jun 15, 2014

I think my tolerance for extreme leftward/rightward...

@ddt I think my tolerance for extreme leftward/rightward polemics is super-high.
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Jun 15, 2014

He wrote a really good poem about honeybees and tungsten...

He wrote a really good poem about honeybees and tungsten once on talk.bizarre.
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Jun 15, 2014

I always wondered what became of Curtis Yarvin from...

I always wondered what became of Curtis Yarvin from talk.bizarre and it turns out he's Mencius Moldbug: thebaffler.com/...
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Jun 15, 2014

otoh I got to sleep until 8am

@rustyk5 otoh I got to sleep until 8am
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Jun 14, 2014

Why didn't anyone call the robot journalists for comment?

Why didn't anyone call the robot journalists for comment?
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Jun 14, 2014

“How might robot journalists evolve when they have a fuller...

“How might robot journalists evolve when they have a fuller palette of editorial intents available to them?” niemanlab.org/...
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Jun 13, 2014

this is a video of an entirely typical normal everyday...

this is a video of an entirely typical normal everyday emacs text editor usage session vimeo.com/...
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Jun 13, 2014

also the biodegradable hippie litter doesn't really...

@GreaterPumpkin @MorlockP also the biodegradable hippie litter doesn't really biodegrade.
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Jun 13, 2014

eh. it's worth considering when you're regularly dumping a...

@GreaterPumpkin @MorlockP eh. it's worth considering when you're regularly dumping a big pile of shit-and-piss-covered rocks into landfill.
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Jun 13, 2014

for you see computers can do many things, but can a...

@tinysubversions @willf @rustyk5 for you see computers can do many things, but can a computer truly hate? for that, friends, humans still re
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Jun 13, 2014

a giant mainframe. you feed it a word on a piece of pape....

@tinysubversions @willf @rustyk5 a giant mainframe. you feed it a word on a piece of pape. it shrieks DOES NOT COMP—explodes. the word? HATE
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Jun 13, 2014

Whoever you are I love and appreciate you....

Whoever you are I love and appreciate you. twitter.com/...
➛
Jun 13, 2014

all of them i think and they know our antidepressants

@leahfinnegan all of them i think and they know our antidepressants
➛
Jun 13, 2014

“I'm having second thoughts about co-editing the Awl.”...

“I'm having second thoughts about co-editing the Awl.” would be a good Secret post.
➛
Jun 13, 2014

Like, give me something to THINK about. A cabal of vomiters...

Like, give me something to THINK about. A cabal of vomiters at Yahoo! Erotic lizard molting rituals at Gawker. Sotheby's spaniel scat stuff.
➛
Jun 13, 2014

“Five people in leadership at Gawker Media are lizards and...

“Five people in leadership at Gawker Media are lizards and unpaid interns are forced to help them with molting.” Would be a good Secret post
➛
Jun 13, 2014

Another good Secret post would be, “I work on Google Glass...

Another good Secret post would be, “I work on Google Glass and sometimes I sniff the office stability balls and I can't stop.”
➛
Jun 13, 2014

Another good Secret post would be “Four people at the...

Another good Secret post would be “Four people at the National Review have AIDS.”
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Jun 13, 2014

Another good Secret post would be “The only reason I joined...

Another good Secret post would be “The only reason I joined Yahoo! is because I'm an emetophile and there are a dozen of us here.”
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Jun 13, 2014

A good Secret post would be: “I work at Sotheby's handling...

A good Secret post would be: “I work at Sotheby's handling glassware and all of my fantasies are about pooping on a cocker spaniel.”
➛
Jun 13, 2014

i thought it was teens? i like to leave teens alone

@kfan i thought it was teens? i like to leave teens alone
➛
Jun 13, 2014

“I have doubts about my boyfriend.” “Twitter management is...

“I have doubts about my boyfriend.” “Twitter management is bad just sayin'”
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Jun 13, 2014

I just installed Secret (I'm on Android because I'm a dad)...

I just installed Secret (I'm on Android because I'm a dad) and this is the unjuciest shit I've ever seen.
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Jun 13, 2014

“We often say artists like Mac Low are prescient.”...

“We often say artists like Mac Low are prescient.” medium.com/...
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Jun 13, 2014

“Imagine 6 billion or 10 billion people doing nothing but...

“Imagine 6 billion or 10 billion people doing nothing but arts and sciences, culture and exploring and learning.” blog.pmarca.com/...
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Jun 13, 2014

“Quinn: Hey mom, can we start with health insurance?”...

“Quinn: Hey mom, can we start with health insurance?” medium.com/...
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Jun 13, 2014

i was wondering if it would do that. lol. fuck that service...

@mattbuchanan i was wondering if it would do that. lol. fuck that service erased.
➛
Jun 13, 2014

whoa sumall totally just sends that out on your behalf...

whoa sumall totally just sends that out on your behalf without checking first
➛
Jun 13, 2014

i just imagined a picture of that cup and the word SOON

@abackstrom i just imagined a picture of that cup and the word SOON
➛
Jun 13, 2014

in the video everyone is walking in slow motion alone in a...

in the video everyone is walking in slow motion alone in a narcissistic haze holding a cup that truly knows them and who they are
➛
Jun 13, 2014

that video tho

that video tho
➛
Jun 13, 2014

Guys come on stop hating that cup is awesome. It knows what...

Guys come on stop hating that cup is awesome. It knows what you are drinking! Things that know things are cool.
➛
Jun 13, 2014

“Vessyl isn't just a cup: it's a 13-ounce,...

“Vessyl isn't just a cup: it's a 13-ounce, Bluetooth-enabled, smartphone-syncing, battery-powered supercup.” valleywag.gawker.com/...
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Jun 12, 2014

cool quiver scott

@sjttocs cool quiver scott
➛
Jun 12, 2014

ah yeah, i should edit to make that more clear. it was...

@cpm5280 ah yeah, i should edit to make that more clear. it was tricky--he actually cut his family out after they joined AlAnon.
➛
Jun 12, 2014

Do you hear that loud wet “squick” noise? That's the sound...

Do you hear that loud wet “squick” noise? That's the sound of awesome think-pieces about Iraq, Syria, and the World Cup headed our way!
➛
Jun 12, 2014

Everyone was so bummed and freaked out when this happened...

Everyone was so bummed and freaked out when this happened at Harper's. Shame Ketcham fears retribution. newrepublic.com/...
➛
Jun 12, 2014

“Among the Auschwitz selfies, several people are wearing...

“Among the Auschwitz selfies, several people are wearing headphones.” theawl.com/...
➛
Jun 12, 2014

no, it was perfect

@j_zimms no, it was perfect
➛
Jun 12, 2014

Oh, the Pitches You'll Get!

@rustyk5 Oh, the Pitches You'll Get!
➛
Jun 12, 2014

“Despite my intentions it all ended up being about the...

“Despite my intentions it all ended up being about the Internet” is going to be my epitaph. @ftrain/no-litter-no-memes-b7bf70791175" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.com/@ftrain/no-litter-no-memes-b7bf70791175
➛
Jun 12, 2014

I wonder if you are a journalist who covers the kitty...

I wonder if you are a journalist who covers the kitty litter industry what constitutes a scoop.
➛
Jun 12, 2014

Oh no, she is right. A momentary flash of joy that would...

@karenmcgrane Oh no, she is right. A momentary flash of joy that would result in a long series of disappointed emails.
➛
Jun 12, 2014

In fairness, that title was a terrible idea.

In fairness, that title was a terrible idea.
➛
Jun 12, 2014

I suggested the title “First you get the litter, then you...

I suggested the title “First you get the litter, then you get the kittens,” but my editor wrote “I will absolutely say no to that title.”
➛
Jun 12, 2014

Halfway through writing it I realized that without kitty...

Halfway through writing it I realized that without kitty litter the Internet would be DRASTICALLY different. @ftrain/no-litter-no-memes-b7bf70791175" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.com/@ftrain/no-litter-no-memes-b7bf70791175
➛
Jun 12, 2014

I wrote about kitty litter for @Medium because I wanted to...

I wrote about kitty litter for @Medium because I wanted to write something that had nothing to do with the Internet. @ftrain/no-litter-no-memes-b7bf70791175" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.com/@ftrain/no-litter-no-memes-b7bf70791175
➛
Jun 11, 2014

Huh. I love Wordperfect, it was the best word processor and...

@newsagg Huh. I love Wordperfect, it was the best word processor and I keep an emulated copy of 5.2 installed in case I ever need it.
➛
Jun 11, 2014

i know right sometimes i just think about cardhouse stuff...

@bn2b @cardhouse i know right sometimes i just think about cardhouse stuff and laugh
➛
Jun 11, 2014

except emacs has an api that people are welcomed to use

@cxy except emacs has an api that people are welcomed to use
➛
Jun 11, 2014

no i know, like it's not an either/or thing. the whole...

@bn2b no i know, like it's not an either/or thing. the whole luddite "this is so distracting" is lame and boring.
➛
Jun 11, 2014

good times

@bn2b good times
➛
Jun 11, 2014

Remember how Cardhouse would repeat things after a sentence...

@bn2b Remember how Cardhouse would repeat things after a sentence and it was funny? Cardhouse.
➛
Jun 11, 2014

no i know. your software was pretty good at helping friends...

@bn2b no i know. your software was pretty good at helping friends be friends, like eggpost. eggpost.
➛
Jun 11, 2014

LinkedIn and Facebook are the MS Office version of humans....

LinkedIn and Facebook are the MS Office version of humans. And Twitter is sort of the WordPerfect if we're truthful it reveals codes.
➛
Jun 11, 2014

right, @bn2b! which is really great, internet friends are...

right, @bn2b! which is really great, internet friends are great friends, but internet friend-helping software is often bad software.
➛
Jun 11, 2014

Biology-wise I may have messed that up and I'm sure people...

Biology-wise I may have messed that up and I'm sure people will step in to help.
➛
Jun 11, 2014

Now they're out there, friends of friends, waiting and all...

Now they're out there, friends of friends, waiting and all latent and ready to be ACTIVATED, like pupating drones awaiting our musk.
➛
Jun 11, 2014

Friends of friends just used to be strangers. Maybe you'd...

Friends of friends just used to be strangers. Maybe you'd meet them at a party and talk about Rei Momo, a couple times a year.
➛
Jun 11, 2014

When I was 15 I had a couple of friends and there were five...

When I was 15 I had a couple of friends and there were five or six billion strangers and they seemed pretty cool. But now, whoosh.
➛
Jun 11, 2014

Can you restore degrees of separation?

Can you restore degrees of separation?
➛
Jun 11, 2014

nooooo Ashlee is awesome and I have nothing but sympathy...

@joeld nooooo Ashlee is awesome and I have nothing but sympathy given the subject--its an impossible chore to lock that stuff down
➛
Jun 11, 2014

“New memory and networking technology requires a new...

“New memory and networking technology requires a new operating system.” businessweek.com/...
➛
Jun 11, 2014

“She is, you little shit, she is.” —@taffyakner...

“She is, you little shit, she is.” —@taffyakner medium.com/...
➛
Jun 10, 2014

“Rarity itself has become very rare.”...

“Rarity itself has become very rare.” medium.com/...
➛
Jun 10, 2014

i love how the product emphasized SECURITY as if anyone...

@Twylo i love how the product emphasized SECURITY as if anyone really cared
➛
Jun 10, 2014

you recycle them by throwing them in to mount doom

@mrb_bk @harrisj you recycle them by throwing them in to mount doom
➛
Jun 10, 2014

it offered rapid zeroization

@mrb_bk @harrisj it offered rapid zeroization
➛
Jun 10, 2014

wow i want that

@phooky wow i want that
➛
Jun 10, 2014

Son, whatever happens in wearables, never forget the Java...

Son, whatever happens in wearables, never forget the Java ring. nngroup.com/...
➛
Jun 9, 2014

“Joseph Wilcox, 31, who had been in the checkout line,...

“Joseph Wilcox, 31, who had been in the checkout line, approached Mr. Miller brandishing a weapon, the police said.” nytimes.com/...
➛
Jun 9, 2014

hotels always hotels

@michelet hotels always hotels
➛
Jun 9, 2014

Analytics from that toilet poll...

Analytics from that toilet poll twitter.com/...
➛
Jun 9, 2014

Sure we suck at technology but I bet NYC people can hold...

Sure we suck at technology but I bet NYC people can hold their pee longer than any other city.
➛
Jun 9, 2014

TOILET POLL https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1P_VMxvfTEmHDnK6...

TOILET POLL docs.google.com/...
➛
Jun 9, 2014

i'm sorry that i have never toilet trained twins in any...

i'm sorry that i have never toilet trained twins in any other major metropolitan area let me set up a google form
➛
Jun 9, 2014

on twitter any dad is full dad

@jacqui on twitter any dad is full dad
➛
Jun 9, 2014

I'm sorry about the word yawp but character limits uno

I'm sorry about the word yawp but character limits uno
➛
Jun 9, 2014

And it's like no we can't have toilets because, I dunno,...

And it's like no we can't have toilets because, I dunno, homosexuals probably and the homeless.
➛
Jun 9, 2014

AND NO TOILETS EVER ANYWHERE EVER

@mvsyyz AND NO TOILETS EVER ANYWHERE EVER
➛
Jun 9, 2014

a hovering bureaucracy that wears you the fuck out and...

@mvsyyz a hovering bureaucracy that wears you the fuck out and creeps into your brain ala theawl.com/...
➛
Jun 9, 2014

Standing behind trees with a toddler who refuses to unhand...

Standing behind trees with a toddler who refuses to unhand his own wang, both covered in urine, as passerby look querulously to his yawps.
➛
Jun 9, 2014

Can I just go full dad for one minute and say that toilet...

Can I just go full dad for one minute and say that toilet training in NYC is a special kind of insanity.
➛
Jun 9, 2014

“I ended up modeling transparent insincerity, which I guess...

“I ended up modeling transparent insincerity, which I guess will be part of how she sees me from here on out. ” theawl.com/...
➛
Jun 9, 2014

(5) The horrible thing that happened that I will now be...

@tcarmody @harrisj (5) The horrible thing that happened that I will now be underpaid to relate.
➛
Jun 9, 2014

(1) Why X sold to Y; (2) Computers are fast, no fast; (3)...

@harrisj @tcarmody (1) Why X sold to Y; (2) Computers are fast, no fast; (3) People are weird and technology doesn't change that.
➛
Jun 9, 2014

no but it is right? like, I've now written the same piece...

@harrisj @tcarmody no but it is right? like, I've now written the same piece 500 times in my career.
➛
Jun 9, 2014

SORRY SORRY YES I meant thank you.

@leppert SORRY SORRY YES I meant thank you.
➛
Jun 9, 2014

I'm a little late and, well, I think you're the father.

@leppert I'm a little late and, well, I think you're the father.
➛
Jun 9, 2014

wizard level not giving a fuck

@tcarmody wizard level not giving a fuck
➛
Jun 9, 2014

Note http://www.buzzfeed.com/katienotopoulos/not-actually-va...

Note buzzfeed.com/... then harken back to 2010s buzzfeed.com/... to realize that BF is playing a rich intertextual game with us.
➛
Jun 9, 2014

https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/476096146658820096/photo/1

twitter.com/...
➛
Jun 9, 2014

Focus on the positive and reject negativity, and you will...

Focus on the positive and reject negativity, and you will soon discover that you CAN even.
➛
Jun 9, 2014

like microchip fabrication!

@allanwhite like microchip fabrication!
➛
Jun 6, 2014

Anyway its cool to see that the CIA didn't fuck up at least...

Anyway its cool to see that the CIA didn't fuck up at least one psyops campaign.
➛
Jun 6, 2014

Until today engaging with the CIA brand meant being burned...

Until today engaging with the CIA brand meant being burned with red-hot coat hangers in violation of international law.
➛
Jun 6, 2014

“the lack of choice we actually still face today” is...

@joeld “the lack of choice we actually still face today” is exactly right. cool piece.
➛
Jun 6, 2014

“So when we got off the train I gave her a few bucks and...

“So when we got off the train I gave her a few bucks and told her to go get some milk.” gothamist.com/...
➛
Jun 6, 2014

“THE SYSTEM HAS NO PROMPT AND ONLY TWO CONTROL CHARS”...

“THE SYSTEM HAS NO PROMPT AND ONLY TWO CONTROL CHARS” rfc-editor.org/...
➛
Jun 6, 2014

I think 150 years ago I would have been yoked to a plow.

@atrubek @rustyk5 I think 150 years ago I would have been yoked to a plow.
➛
Jun 6, 2014

If you had been born 100 years ago, what would you have...

If you had been born 100 years ago, what would you have done for a living?
➛
Jun 6, 2014

if you'd been born 100 yrs ago what would you have done for...

@rustyk5 if you'd been born 100 yrs ago what would you have done for a living? i figure I'd have my grandfather's job, newspaper leadsetter.
➛
Jun 6, 2014

if they could just cut off all Internet to Portland your...

@rustyk5 if they could just cut off all Internet to Portland your life would be pretty sweet
➛
Jun 6, 2014

but the Madeleine cookies are so tasty

@rustyk5 but the Madeleine cookies are so tasty
➛
Jun 6, 2014

i mean who doesn't love large collections of state ala...

@Kirinn @steuard @pboothe i mean who doesn't love large collections of state ala versioned smalltalk image files?
➛
Jun 6, 2014

documents called doc.docx

@merveille documents called doc.docx
➛
Jun 6, 2014

if you're confused by xanadu this book will help...

if you're confused by xanadu this book will help #page/n107/mode/2up" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://archive.org/stream/Literary.Machines.1987/Literary.Machines.1987.Edition.Ted.Nelson#page/n107/mode/2up
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Jun 5, 2014

gelernter mindstreams yo

@tophtucker gelernter mindstreams yo
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Jun 5, 2014

the tag cloud was the real cloud

the tag cloud was the real cloud
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Jun 5, 2014

zero pad on that one or they sort 1 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18...

@rustiest zero pad on that one or they sort 1 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 2 20 etc
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Jun 5, 2014

don't worry josh, no one blames you any more

@joshu don't worry josh, no one blames you any more
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Jun 5, 2014

1. yes. 2. my initials

@honatwork 1. yes. 2. my initials
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Jun 5, 2014

oh frank when i was there 2005-2010 i had to maintain his...

@flantz oh frank when i was there 2005-2010 i had to maintain his copy of wordperfect 5.2 for dos it was one of my editorial duties
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Jun 5, 2014

I know, you think, I'll use tagging. And now you have zero...

I know, you think, I'll use tagging. And now you have zero problems because no one uses tagging.
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Jun 5, 2014

no one listens in the first place so we'll never know

@hyperpape no one listens in the first place so we'll never know
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Jun 5, 2014

you see chris this is how it starts

@chrisdary you see chris this is how it starts
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Jun 5, 2014

Human beings cannot name documents. You spend 30 hours on a...

Human beings cannot name documents. You spend 30 hours on a memo that will be read by 5,000 people and you name it MEMO.doc.
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Jun 5, 2014

Naming a document FINAL.ppt is basically an invitation to...

Naming a document FINAL.ppt is basically an invitation to the work Púcas to insist on changes.
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Jun 5, 2014

What if two people have the same initials, you ask? Then...

What if two people have the same initials, you ask? Then use the full last name. Do I have to brush your teeth too?
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Jun 5, 2014

No one has listened to me regarding this important matter...

No one has listened to me regarding this important matter for 19 years yet I have given it much thought, dedicating long hours alone to it.
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Jun 5, 2014

Always copy the file, up the number, and add your initials....

Always copy the file, up the number, and add your initials. Deliverables can be sorted by date. Very easy for managers and workers alike.
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Jun 5, 2014

Incidentally the only right way to name files is...

Incidentally the only right way to name files is Client/ProjectName/2014-07-01/PresentationToExecBoard_013pef.docx.
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Jun 5, 2014

“How should one name a document file?” is one of those...

“How should one name a document file?” is one of those questions that should have an answer by now.
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Jun 5, 2014

pretttttty sleepy

pretttttty sleepy
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Jun 5, 2014

Font people will bust a cap in your ascender

Font people will bust a cap in your ascender
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Jun 5, 2014

“The font people don't play.” http://kottke.org/14/06/hoefle...

“The font people don't play.” kottke.org/...
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Jun 5, 2014

“Leading Gittip feels to me like backing up a...

“Leading Gittip feels to me like backing up a triple-trailer truck.” medium.com/...
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Jun 5, 2014

I like the way the seating doesn't require touching.

@harrisj @jenniferdaniel I like the way the seating doesn't require touching.
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Jun 5, 2014

this is my hellmouth

@harrisj this is my hellmouth
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Jun 5, 2014

where else would I be

@harrisj where else would I be
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Jun 5, 2014

Having coffee downstairs at 620 8th Ave admiring the subtle...

Having coffee downstairs at 620 8th Ave admiring the subtle interaction of sportcoat and denim.
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Jun 5, 2014

Do meteorologists give tempests of disgust female names or...

Do meteorologists give tempests of disgust female names or male names?
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Jun 5, 2014

The phrase “Tempest of Disgust” means that net outrage...

The phrase “Tempest of Disgust” means that net outrage culture has merged with 80s hair-band heavy metal culture. npr.org/...
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Jun 5, 2014

“That stirred up the latest tempest of disgust on both...

“That stirred up the latest tempest of disgust on both sides of the Atlantic Ocean.” npr.org/...
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Jun 5, 2014

To be fair, focus groups preferred horses 15:1.

@jackrusher To be fair, focus groups preferred horses 15:1.
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Jun 5, 2014

Xanadu: I love it. Its true to his vision in “Literary...

Xanadu: I love it. Its true to his vision in “Literary Machines.” The person got the thing out of his brain and onto the screen. 51 years!
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Jun 5, 2014

i guess now xanadu will get acquired

i guess now xanadu will get acquired
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Jun 5, 2014

they're just getting started

@veen they're just getting started
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Jun 5, 2014

this doc is dated 14.05.28 http://xanadu.com/PurpData-D16.tx...

@scottros this doc is dated 14.05.28 xanadu.com/...
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Jun 5, 2014

xanadu shipped http://xanadu.com/#deliverable

xanadu shipped #deliverable" target="_blank" rel="noopener">http://xanadu.com/#deliverable
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Jun 5, 2014

“Its bizarre structure was created by arbitrary initiatives...

“Its bizarre structure was created by arbitrary initiatives of varied people &it has a terrible programming language” xanadu.com
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Jun 4, 2014

Goebbels should have led digital

@leahfinnegan Goebbels should have led digital
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Jun 4, 2014

the press has adapted to the new conditions surprisingly...

@leahfinnegan the press has adapted to the new conditions surprisingly quickly
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Jun 4, 2014

yeah I mean it's not a surprise if you know any novelists

@leahfinnegan yeah I mean it's not a surprise if you know any novelists
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Jun 4, 2014

3000 word piece, got 6000 words written, with 2000 to go

@tcarmody 3000 word piece, got 6000 words written, with 2000 to go
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Jun 4, 2014

telling it like it is this wednesday tim not gonna stop...

@tcarmody telling it like it is this wednesday tim not gonna stop gotta lot of deadlines feeling pretty goddam cranky
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Jun 4, 2014

Fonts give people who can't code something to be arch about.

Fonts give people who can't code something to be arch about.
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Jun 4, 2014

this just inspired a tweet I am about to tweet as part the...

@tcarmody this just inspired a tweet I am about to tweet as part the #tweettruth i am laying down today
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Jun 4, 2014

Explainer sites are basically Usenet FAQs but hardly ever...

Explainer sites are basically Usenet FAQs but hardly ever have good information about back-packing with your llama faqs.org/...
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Jun 4, 2014

Tim this is the Internet the only reason it exists is so...

@tcarmody Tim this is the Internet the only reason it exists is so nerds can explain how it works in a superior tone.
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Jun 4, 2014

It's time we toughened up and got serious around here. No...

It's time we toughened up and got serious around here. No more of your goddam ☃ or ↬ your little baby emoji bullshit.
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Jun 4, 2014

Do not click on that and then reply writing, “I don't know...

Do not click on that and then reply writing, “I don't know what I expected.” You expected a piggie poop balls explainer and you got one.
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Jun 4, 2014

“Jeff provided a second picture, never before seen, of a...

“Jeff provided a second picture, never before seen, of a the same pig, after the turd had fallen off the balls.” buzzfeed.com/...
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Jun 4, 2014

At least once a week I think to myself, I am grateful to...

At least once a week I think to myself, I am grateful to live in Big Freedia's America. vimeo.com/...
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Jun 4, 2014

“My tolerance for ‘amazing,’ if anything, has gone up in...

“My tolerance for ‘amazing,’ if anything, has gone up in the last two years.” @page88/the-amazing-9c2314d1a6a1" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.com/@page88/the-amazing-9c2314d1a6a1
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Jun 3, 2014

oh it was no big deal it was for a reading and mike albo...

@Caterina @doreeshafrir oh it was no big deal it was for a reading and mike albo could make it
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Jun 3, 2014

I was trying to be cheerfully apologetic about something...

@Caterina @doreeshafrir I was trying to be cheerfully apologetic about something but no it was insufferable and I should've been imprisoned.
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Jun 3, 2014

Reaching back in time to punch myself.

Reaching back in time to punch myself.
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Jun 3, 2014

Sometimes you search your email and stumble on regretful...

Sometimes you search your email and stumble on regretful things. I'm sorry, @doreeshafrir, for using “like the dickens” in an email in 2007.
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Jun 3, 2014

sigh yes, and it'd be complex to open it on day zero given...

@jackrusher sigh yes, and it'd be complex to open it on day zero given how tied in it is with cocoa. it's just that the page made me go hmmm
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Jun 3, 2014

It seems that in creating Swift Apple borrowed everything...

It seems that in creating Swift Apple borrowed everything but the open-source licenses nondot.org/...
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Jun 3, 2014

but it's not saturday

@rustyk5 but it's not saturday
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Jun 3, 2014

Scientifically, an eldritch force causes a synthetic prong...

@rustyk5 Scientifically, an eldritch force causes a synthetic prong to erect in the darkness, at which it starts eructating unto the spoons.
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Jun 3, 2014

I'm looking forward to the big red $0.00 I can put on top...

@Choire @manjulamartin @JaneFriedman I'm looking forward to the big red $0.00 I can put on top of Twitter.
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Jun 3, 2014

“But there’s good news: Early backers are going to get...

“But there’s good news: Early backers are going to get *two* stickers!” medium.com/...
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Jun 3, 2014

If I could get the data in a Google Spreadsheet I'd write...

If I could get the data in a Google Spreadsheet I'd write that plugin. @manjulamartin @JaneFriedman
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Jun 3, 2014

Hey @manjulamartin @JaneFriedman is there a chrome plugin...

Hey @manjulamartin @JaneFriedman is there a chrome plugin that puts what writers are paid on the top of websites yet?
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Jun 2, 2014

“Fathers are more likely to roughhouse, and rough play is...

“Fathers are more likely to roughhouse, and rough play is good for children.” nytimes.com/...
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Jun 2, 2014

“The 1,600-square-meter structure is massive, so you can...

“The 1,600-square-meter structure is massive, so you can explore it from inside.” fastcodesign.com/...
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Jun 2, 2014

“It’s unclear whether Levie clapped after Federighi...

“It’s unclear whether Levie clapped after Federighi announced iCloud Drive on stage.” techcrunch.com/...
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Jun 2, 2014

get it out of my brain

@rustyk5 get it out of my brain
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Jun 2, 2014

oh yeah that's amazing

@blankenship oh yeah that's amazing
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Jun 2, 2014

back then i was all like, “I think people scroll!”

@tripleman back then i was all like, “I think people scroll!”
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Jun 2, 2014

“‘What we thought of as a purely maternal circuit can also...

“‘What we thought of as a purely maternal circuit can also be turned on just by being a parent.’” news.sciencemag.org/...
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Jun 2, 2014

Figured I'd throw out this old chestnut from 2012:...

Figured I'd throw out this old chestnut from 2012: medium.com/...
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Jun 2, 2014

No one has said “I want to spread publishing culture around...

@entropymedia No one has said “I want to spread publishing culture around the world” since maybe 1540.
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Jun 2, 2014

I mean it's personal experience! That's fine. I think it's...

@entropymedia I mean it's personal experience! That's fine. I think it's just fascinating that it's a culture to spread.
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Jun 2, 2014

“I’d love to see a diaspora of startup thinking and startup...

“I’d love to see a diaspora of startup thinking and startup culture spread around the world.” medium.com/...
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Jun 1, 2014

And then everything explodes.

And then everything explodes.
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Jun 1, 2014

Every time I finish some serious chunk of code I think the...

Every time I finish some serious chunk of code I think the words “behold the power of this fully operational battle station.”
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Jun 1, 2014

i know i'm going to have a talking with

@gunzalis i know i'm going to have a talking with
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Jun 1, 2014

growth hacking sounds like something people with lung...

growth hacking sounds like something people with lung tumors do
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Jun 1, 2014

not an option thank god

@rustyk5 not an option thank god
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Jun 1, 2014

24 is just narcissistic rage and conspiracy thinking and...

@rustyk5 24 is just narcissistic rage and conspiracy thinking and underemployment. but also a lot of fun in retrospect.
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Jun 1, 2014

the worst, it really is

@rustyk5 the worst, it really is
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Jun 1, 2014

I hope everyone involved in that story is out there...

I hope everyone involved in that story is out there enjoying their search for meaning.
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Jun 1, 2014

oh wow this conference they were putting together (i didn't...

oh wow this conference they were putting together (i didn't get invited) was Jack Ma, someone from Google Base, and someone from Icerocket
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Jun 1, 2014

we went to Bobby Vans on 50th

we went to Bobby Vans on 50th
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Jun 1, 2014

oh wait it was 2006, mea culpa #twactchecking

oh wait it was 2006, mea culpa #twactchecking
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Jun 1, 2014

but i bet metadata was a big part of it

@pdavies but i bet metadata was a big part of it
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Jun 1, 2014

pete i'm good at predicting the future not remembering the...

@pdavies pete i'm good at predicting the future not remembering the past
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Jun 1, 2014

like my twitter bio says, i'm the fun cassandra.

@dntsqzthchrmn @tcarmody like my twitter bio says, i'm the fun cassandra.
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Jun 1, 2014

i only remember how incredibly wrong my sweater was in that...

@tcarmody i only remember how incredibly wrong my sweater was in that environment
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Jun 1, 2014

it was two worlds colliding and their world was clearly the...

@toomuchnick it was two worlds colliding and their world was clearly the winner. i think they subscribed me to their newsletter.
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Jun 1, 2014

i wore the only sweater i owned and had no idea what was...

i wore the only sweater i owned and had no idea what was happening.
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Jun 1, 2014

charlie everyone who interacts with me wins

@vruba charlie everyone who interacts with me wins
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Jun 1, 2014

true: dudes from bear sterns took me out for steak in 2002...

true: dudes from bear sterns took me out for steak in 2002 because they thought my blog was prescient and asked me to predict the future
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Jun 1, 2014

i updated my twitter bio to read “the fun cassandra”

@michaelroston i updated my twitter bio to read “the fun cassandra”
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Jun 1, 2014

i mean i thought it was satire

@michaelroston i mean i thought it was satire
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Jun 1, 2014

everyone charlie loyd has a newsletter here...

everyone charlie loyd has a newsletter here tinyletter.com/... & it appears to just be him being his nerd self at length so EXCELLENT
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Jun 1, 2014

cool charlie has a newsletter no not here on his website or...

@vruba cool charlie has a newsletter no not here on his website or in his twitter bio i'm googling charlie loyd newsletter AHHHHHHH
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Jun 1, 2014

i bet it would have more if you told people about it charlie

@vruba i bet it would have more if you told people about it charlie
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Jun 1, 2014

Or, like one person. That works too.

Or, like one person. That works too.
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Jun 1, 2014

Or you know, 200 people.

Or you know, 200 people.
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Jun 1, 2014

For all that we have turned the web into a shitpile of...

For all that we have turned the web into a shitpile of horrors, you can still make something from your brain and reach 100,000 people.
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Jun 1, 2014

this is more about giving up in disgust

@clairexstrom this is more about giving up in disgust
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Jun 1, 2014

“The sharing economy’s success is...tied to the economic...

“The sharing economy’s success is...tied to the economic recession, making new American poverty palatable.” medium.com/...
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Jun 1, 2014

in the second half I promised to send anyone who read the...

@monteiro in the second half I promised to send anyone who read the whole tweet a million dollars
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Jun 1, 2014

I have a hashtag proposal: #WISR, for “where I stopped...

I have a hashtag proposal: #WISR, for “where I stopped reading.”
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Jun 1, 2014

“And in fairness to the think pieces....” ...

“And in fairness to the think pieces....” nytimes.com/...
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Jun 1, 2014

Is there another job where you are supposed to uphold the...

Is there another job where you are supposed to uphold the best of culture while cleaning wino puke out of the Curious George carpet?
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Jun 1, 2014

I mean librarians don't hate. They accept everything but...

I mean librarians don't hate. They accept everything but funding cuts. They get upset when people poop in the stacks. r0.simplebooklet.com/...
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Jun 1, 2014

“Librarians Hate It - The One Website Book Lovers Need to...

“Librarians Hate It - The One Website Book Lovers Need to Know” is a real headline I just saw on this ol' Internet.
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