May 31, 2013 Twins after blueberries https://vine.co/v/bY0xn2YV0Xt Twins after blueberries vine.co/... ➛
May 31, 2013 air conditioning here is turned up so high i'm freezing @shani_o air conditioning here is turned up so high i'm freezing ➛
May 31, 2013 just a lifetime of regret and you're not even a month old @shani_o just a lifetime of regret and you're not even a month old ➛
May 31, 2013 but the worst was friends-of-friends who named their... @shani_o but the worst was friends-of-friends who named their daughter Juno the same month the movie came out ➛
May 31, 2013 but we actually figured it out the weeks were just... @shani_o but we actually figured it out the weeks were just different enough that they'll never be in school together ➛
May 31, 2013 soon and i want to see you. i'm out next week but week... @jackrusher soon and i want to see you. i'm out next week but week after. ➛
May 31, 2013 like when we named our daughter Ivy TWO WEEKS BEFORE BLUE... @shani_o like when we named our daughter Ivy TWO WEEKS BEFORE BLUE IVY WAS BORN? ➛
May 31, 2013 the cronut is an eruption of donut disruption @professorlemeza the cronut is an eruption of donut disruption ➛
May 31, 2013 “4. You don’t write personal essays.”... “4. You don’t write personal essays.” 6thfloor.blogs.nytimes.com/... ➛
May 31, 2013 It is true, America needs mass-produced fried croissants so... It is true, America needs mass-produced fried croissants so that innovation in the Breakfast Cronutwich can proceed. ➛
May 31, 2013 THIS BAKERY (drops rolling pin; shockwaves explode all... THIS BAKERY (drops rolling pin; shockwaves explode all windows) IS NOT (exploding flour cloud) A CRONUT STORE (apron turns to gold). ➛
May 31, 2013 “I've said it once and will say it again: This bakery is... “I've said it once and will say it again: This bakery is not a cronut store.” nymag.com/... ➛
May 31, 2013 guys if xanga goes away how will we know who among us... @katienotopoulos @rustyk5 guys if xanga goes away how will we know who among us unsuccessfully experimented with bisexuality ➛
May 31, 2013 okay, here it is [690 entries about not having sex with my... @katienotopoulos @rustyk5 okay, here it is [690 entries about not having sex with my manager at Barnes & Noble elided] what do u think ➛
May 31, 2013 a whole afternoon flushed right down the friendhole a whole afternoon flushed right down the friendhole ➛
May 31, 2013 I respect that Warren Buffett invests in two things that... I respect that Warren Buffett invests in two things that America needs to stay strong: Local newspapers and abortion. ➛
May 31, 2013 wow remember millennials was that even a thing wow remember millennials was that even a thing ➛
May 31, 2013 nope we either copied from them (likely) or they copied... @gokari nope we either copied from them (likely) or they copied from us (maybe) but it's a thing that goes around on parental mailing lists ➛
May 31, 2013 This is known in some circles as “The Friedman Problem.” @harrisj @NYTFridge @michaelroston This is known in some circles as “The Friedman Problem.” ➛
May 31, 2013 Look at Lincoln's average sentence length! Compared with... @thejefflarson Look at Lincoln's average sentence length! Compared with Clarendon! ➛
May 31, 2013 being awful is okay, a badge of honor, but being called a... @harrisj @NYTFridge @michaelroston being awful is okay, a badge of honor, but being called a fraud is probably TRUE ➛
May 31, 2013 buffalo beast and nypress. but frauds jacob frauds are... @harrisj @NYTFridge @michaelroston buffalo beast and nypress. but frauds jacob frauds are worse. ➛
May 31, 2013 this is very easy for an anonymous appliance to say @NYTFridge @harrisj @michaelroston this is very easy for an anonymous appliance to say ➛
May 31, 2013 it has all sorts of statistical analysis of word count by... @thejefflarson it has all sorts of statistical analysis of word count by writer by graf, highly recommended ➛
May 31, 2013 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Fh6eLXGmog @rustyk5 @harrisj @michaelroston youtube.com/... ➛
May 31, 2013 Here is a set of paragraph symbols to help you today:... Here is a set of paragraph symbols to help you today: #page/n17/mode/2up" target="_blank" rel="noopener">http://archive.org/stream/cu31924026640247#page/n17/mode/2up ➛
May 31, 2013 no post its on google glass rusty @rustyk5 @harrisj @michaelroston no post its on google glass rusty ➛
May 31, 2013 i found this old moldy list of kids in my little league in... @rustyk5 @harrisj @michaelroston i found this old moldy list of kids in my little league in the basement it was a fusty roster ➛
May 31, 2013 wait that was a weird humblebrag @rustyk5 @harrisj @michaelroston wait that was a weird humblebrag ➛
May 31, 2013 “‘They always ask for my feedback and I can't keep coming... “‘They always ask for my feedback and I can't keep coming up with worse words.’” online.wsj.com/... ➛
May 31, 2013 oh god this list it would be so viral @michaelroston @harrisj oh god this list it would be so viral ➛
May 31, 2013 A professional is just a slightly older fraud. A professional is just a slightly older fraud. ➛
May 31, 2013 neither one exists within a framework that is... @eventi @yacomink @mwilkie @finn neither one exists within a framework that is mathematically provable perlmonks.org #notthateither ➛
May 31, 2013 “I wouldn’t say it qualifies as ‘genius,’ and it might get... “I wouldn’t say it qualifies as ‘genius,’ and it might get you expelled from some universities.” nytimes.com/... ➛
May 31, 2013 Horrible but everywhere? Oh I can't even, I love perl... @mwilkie @eventi @yacomink @finn Horrible but everywhere? Oh I can't even, I love perl regexps, they made me. ➛
May 31, 2013 yes but if you get health care and shelter the amount of... @tharsheblows yes but if you get health care and shelter the amount of awesome information you can get is AMAZING so i mean there is that ➛
May 31, 2013 There's absolutely no reason for you to watch Ashton... There's absolutely no reason for you to watch Ashton Kutcher and John Doerr talk to each other, @rustyk5, because you already have chickens. ➛
May 31, 2013 Spelling bee memory: I was in 3d grade, trying for... Spelling bee memory: I was in 3d grade, trying for "necessary," when Mike R— showed me his testicles. Went silent, was disqualified. ➛
May 31, 2013 “The way HireArt works, explained Sharef (who was my... “The way HireArt works, explained Sharef (who was my daughter’s college roommate)” nytimes.com/... ➛
May 30, 2013 I...it's not...I really wanted to...they... @yacomink I...it's not...I really wanted to...they didn't...actually...yeah. ➛
May 29, 2013 There's this one episode of Jack Benny where they go, "AND... There's this one episode of Jack Benny where they go, "AND NOW FOR SPOT NEWS." [dog barking] "THAT WAS SPOT." Anyway goodnight. ➛
May 29, 2013 oh god today was a serious exception you are in for quite a... @carmendukes @rustyk5 oh god today was a serious exception you are in for quite a ride ➛
May 29, 2013 i want you to spend so much money on me that it makes... i want you to spend so much money on me that it makes everyone angry i want to be your snow fall ➛
May 29, 2013 i want to tell you how much i love you so i built a... i want to tell you how much i love you so i built a one-page website with infinite scroll ➛
May 29, 2013 the snow fall of just being good to each other @harrisj the snow fall of just being good to each other ➛
May 29, 2013 it paced itself and kept revealing more and more, never... it paced itself and kept revealing more and more, never overplayed its hands it was the snow fall of real estate slide shows ➛
May 29, 2013 When not decorating his place in Shostakovich's old... When not decorating his place in Shostakovich's old building in deco-Stalinist style, he cruises in his PT Cruiser. nytimes.com/... ➛
May 29, 2013 If Sheila E had married Prince how would she have... If Sheila E had married Prince how would she have hyphenated her last name? ➛
May 29, 2013 I was in college before I learned that dogies are not... I was in college before I learned that dogies are not doggies in Sweet Baby James. ➛
May 29, 2013 Now is the time in planning the talk when I cut six hours... Now is the time in planning the talk when I cut six hours down to ten minutes and realize I am 50 minutes short. ➛
May 29, 2013 hey, Jim! Thanks. Hope I'll see you before too long. @jimray hey, Jim! Thanks. Hope I'll see you before too long. ➛
May 29, 2013 jim hey! god it's a pretty day in nyc. just the nicest day. @jimray jim hey! god it's a pretty day in nyc. just the nicest day. ➛
May 29, 2013 My programming language only supports corn and I need one... My programming language only supports corn and I need one that handles unicorn. ➛
May 28, 2013 Bring back the Boy Spies of America!... Bring back the Boy Spies of America! en.m.wikipedia.org/... ➛
May 28, 2013 Emu later http://gothamist.com/2013/05/28/an_emu_drowned.php Emu later gothamist.com/... ➛
May 28, 2013 i didn't believe this until I learned that one of gandalf's... @eaton @beep i didn't believe this until I learned that one of gandalf's powers it that he was always home on weekends ➛
May 28, 2013 what if they shut it down right now and said that they... @rustyk5 what if they shut it down right now and said that they would start it up at some random date in the future ➛
May 28, 2013 This is the platonic essence of animated gif cartoons about... This is the platonic essence of animated gif cartoons about salesmen caricaturelondon.files.wordpress.com/... ➛
May 28, 2013 unless that was you going on special trips 89 times with... @rustyk5 unless that was you going on special trips 89 times with your sisters ➛
May 28, 2013 gotta hand it to you you really drew me into your web of... @rustyk5 gotta hand it to you you really drew me into your web of lies ➛
May 28, 2013 What if someone said they were selected for the Listserve... What if someone said they were selected for the Listserve but it was just for attention? ➛
May 28, 2013 It's crazy for a fictional character to have all those... It's crazy for a fictional character to have all those powers. I mean shapeshifting sure but immunity to heat? ➛
May 28, 2013 Here is the link, and Gandalf has a lot of powers.... Here is the link, and Gandalf has a lot of powers. quora.com/... ➛
May 28, 2013 I just realized that we can now shorten that song to "when... @mslopatto I just realized that we can now shorten that song to "when the Irish are smizing." This makes being Irish 35% more efficient. ➛
May 28, 2013 "at night, when hominid eyes were closed" is a truly great... "at night, when hominid eyes were closed" is a truly great qualifier for night. en.wikipedia.org/... ➛
May 28, 2013 some questions about eyebrows were never meant to be asked some questions about eyebrows were never meant to be asked ➛
May 28, 2013 It must have been sad to find that the page is inconclusive... @rustyk5 It must have been sad to find that the page is inconclusive regarding eyebrow function. #science ➛
May 28, 2013 To create a fuller look, eyebrows can be cloned in an... To create a fuller look, eyebrows can be cloned in an eyebrow transplant. ➛
May 28, 2013 for example, eyebrows can KEEP TIGERS AWAY just wear a mask... for example, eyebrows can KEEP TIGERS AWAY just wear a mask on the back of your head en.wikipedia.org/... ➛
May 28, 2013 the eyebrow page on Wikipedia is a freaking delight head... @rustyk5 the eyebrow page on Wikipedia is a freaking delight head over there now ➛
May 26, 2013 “‘For me, what’s subversive about Superman is that it’s not... “‘For me, what’s subversive about Superman is that it’s not subversive.’” nytimes.com/... ➛
May 26, 2013 Sit down son. [Squall rises outside; house goes suddenly,... @rustyk5 Sit down son. [Squall rises outside; house goes suddenly, ominously dark. Gaslamp flickers.] Call me Rusty. ➛
May 26, 2013 “In the current upheaval, the desire to anoint someone... “In the current upheaval, the desire to anoint someone else’s model is the mainstream media’s Achilles’ Leg.” theawl.com/... ➛
May 26, 2013 You're right, I need to go to the mask store. @kendall You're right, I need to go to the mask store. ➛
May 26, 2013 This did interest me, especially as 40 approaches and I... @JoeMoreno @davewiner This did interest me, especially as 40 approaches and I still get a huge kick out of programming. ➛
May 26, 2013 Maybe I should burst into the room in a giant mask and... @maureenflaherty Maybe I should burst into the room in a giant mask and start screaming uncontrollably to distract them. ➛
May 25, 2013 if we aren't disappointed it won't be the Listserve! @rustyk5 @nzle @nostrich if we aren't disappointed it won't be the Listserve! ➛
May 25, 2013 david foster Wallace commencement run through rot13... @rustyk5 @nzle @nostrich david foster Wallace commencement run through rot13 concluding with the words buy ovaltine ➛
May 25, 2013 be cool be cool be cool you can do this @rustyk5 @nzle @nostrich be cool be cool be cool you can do this ➛
May 25, 2013 My wife texted "ream on top of my printer" and I forgot I'd... My wife texted "ream on top of my printer" and I forgot I'd asked her to get paper. Highly awkward moment when she came home. ➛
May 25, 2013 i am going to regret this immediately but can anyone... i am going to regret this immediately but can anyone recommend an anti-fatigue mat for standing all day ➛
May 25, 2013 “An Apple-1 computer, made in 1976, sold for a record... “An Apple-1 computer, made in 1976, sold for a record $671,400 on Saturday at an auction in Germany.” bits.blogs.nytimes.com/... ➛
May 25, 2013 To recover the One Trick one must learn the one trick.... @rustyk5 To recover the One Trick one must learn the one trick. [Looks to eastward, crane shot reveals massive army behind mountain] ➛
May 24, 2013 Stately, plump Buck Mulligan came from the stairhead,... Stately, plump Buck Mulligan came from the stairhead, bearing a bowl of GILETTE SHAVING CREAM on which a mirror and a razor lay crossed. ➛
May 24, 2013 here's a tip to #gogreen and #savetheearth did you know... here's a tip to #gogreen and #savetheearth did you know that three weeks a month you can use a diva cup as a shot glass ➛
May 24, 2013 this whole system is designed to sell more towels this whole system is designed to sell more towels ➛
May 24, 2013 like after a shower, right? i don't understand @danielpunkass like after a shower, right? i don't understand ➛
May 24, 2013 see exactly max are you saying that all books are BETTER... @tealtan @maxfenton see exactly max are you saying that all books are BETTER than all websites max are you saying that max max are you ➛
May 24, 2013 The respondent to that Dove tweet tends to say "3-4" but my... The respondent to that Dove tweet tends to say "3-4" but my average number of towel uses between washes is like 136 #realtalk ➛
May 24, 2013 Understanding the Holocaust brought to you by Krupp, Bayer,... @sjttocs Understanding the Holocaust brought to you by Krupp, Bayer, Volkswagen, and IBM. ➛
May 24, 2013 a free textbook on discrete mathematics for comp sci with... a free textbook on discrete mathematics for comp sci with LOTS of ads self.gutenberg.org/... ➛
May 24, 2013 let's go up to the church attic i think i hear a noise @rustyk5 let's go up to the church attic i think i hear a noise ➛
May 24, 2013 Sure, you provide safety and security while everyone else... @rustyk5 Sure, you provide safety and security while everyone else fingerbangs. But remember EVERYONE gets to drink the hot cider. ➛
May 24, 2013 As my youth pastor used to say, [removes guitar from a case... As my youth pastor used to say, [removes guitar from a case covered with ichthys stickers] ➛
May 24, 2013 listen you can't have a youth-group hayride unless somebody... @rustyk5 listen you can't have a youth-group hayride unless somebody drives the tractor ➛
May 24, 2013 These are promotional tweets because I've worshipped Wally... These are promotional tweets because I've worshipped Wally since I was 12 and his AMERICAN GHOUL book is BATSHIT amazon.com/... ➛
May 24, 2013 Do I wish I'd had a novel about a sensitive punk rock... Do I wish I'd had a novel about a sensitive punk rock corpse-eating teen to guide me when I was younger? YES amazon.com/... ➛
May 24, 2013 My pal Walt is giving away his BANANACAKES YA novel about... My pal Walt is giving away his BANANACAKES YA novel about teenaged punk-rock corpse-eating ghouls today, for free. amazon.com/... ➛
May 24, 2013 I just had this sudden memory of attending a kid's... I just had this sudden memory of attending a kid's nutrition event in the 80s where a dude sang a song called “Carob Bean Queen.” ➛
May 24, 2013 “‘No one understands a whole computer system anymore,’ Mr.... “‘No one understands a whole computer system anymore,’ Mr. Willegal said.” nytimes.com/... ➛
May 24, 2013 haha no just kidding i am actually right now in the process... haha no just kidding i am actually right now in the process of recovering my password for pantsforthehuskyblogger.com ➛
May 24, 2013 after months of training i just completed my first cryathlon after months of training i just completed my first cryathlon ➛
May 24, 2013 coming across dead people in my contacts and remembering... coming across dead people in my contacts and remembering how my grandparents kept their address book in pencil ➛
May 24, 2013 i just want to make sure @ginatrapani has access to that... @xeni @anildash @davewiner i just want to make sure @ginatrapani has access to that image ➛
May 24, 2013 oh i just visited and that site is just @matt_creamer oh i just visited and that site is just ➛
May 24, 2013 or you must watch your darlings be savagely hacked to death... @JosieGerard @twitsplosion or you must watch your darlings be savagely hacked to death in front of you ➛
May 24, 2013 i support a lifetime ban on writers who test positive for... i support a lifetime ban on writers who test positive for adverbs ➛
May 24, 2013 boooooooooooooo although much of it is irrelevant @davewiner boooooooooooooo although much of it is irrelevant ➛
May 24, 2013 question: is it better to plant all the seeds, or to make... question: is it better to plant all the seeds, or to make all the money? answer: ride bikes ➛
May 24, 2013 big transactions get a lot of attention. small ones are... @davewiner big transactions get a lot of attention. small ones are fine but only matter in bulk. it's a lot like banking. ➛
May 24, 2013 you were narrative and set scenes maybe you deserved better... you were narrative and set scenes maybe you deserved better but most likely you deserved to die i will always have you in my email ➛
May 24, 2013 last night at midnight i held a funeral for the 1800 words... last night at midnight i held a funeral for the 1800 words killed from a 3000 word piece goodbye my friends ➛
May 24, 2013 history is pretty good about remembering money history is pretty good about remembering money ➛
May 24, 2013 “‘The people who plant the seed are often forgotten through... “‘The people who plant the seed are often forgotten through history,’ Molina said.” dailydot.com/... ➛
May 24, 2013 “The site was extremely simple and contained a simple... “The site was extremely simple and contained a simple archive system where posts were organized by month and year.” dailydot.com/... ➛
May 24, 2013 Billy Joel: “I’m the Realtor to the stars.”... Billy Joel: “I’m the Realtor to the stars.” nytimes.com/... ➛
May 23, 2013 "Piper's just here to empty her Diva Cup."... "Piper's just here to empty her Diva Cup." parkslopefamilycircus.com/... ➛
May 23, 2013 I keep reading the name of the in-testing "lady Viagra" as... I keep reading the name of the in-testing "lady Viagra" as "LibriVox." Which makes for a great name for a feminine libidinal pill, actually. ➛
May 23, 2013 me too. Ee dee you people are crazy. @internetrebecca me too. Ee dee you people are crazy. ➛
May 22, 2013 A nice set of glitch resources at Rhizome... A nice set of glitch resources at Rhizome rhizome.org/... ➛
May 22, 2013 It was originally supposed to be gᾰf but it had no alpha... It was originally supposed to be gᾰf but it had no alpha channel. ➛
May 22, 2013 this is exactly the emotion i feel it's uncanny @anildash this is exactly the emotion i feel it's uncanny ➛
May 22, 2013 You ever get the feeling like you've been preparing for... You ever get the feeling like you've been preparing for something your whole life? I feel that way about this spinach wrap. ➛
May 22, 2013 joshua i had a web journal in 1996 it's okay @blankenship joshua i had a web journal in 1996 it's okay ➛
May 22, 2013 dan http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NG2EGOB9-lc dan no @danlyke dan youtube.com/... dan no ➛
May 22, 2013 i mean what's up with weeks in the first place so arbitrary... @mattbuchanan i mean what's up with weeks in the first place so arbitrary right do I have seven toes ➛
May 22, 2013 BUT NO ONE HAS EVER SEEN THE REST OF THE OFFICE @billder BUT NO ONE HAS EVER SEEN THE REST OF THE OFFICE ➛
May 22, 2013 everything is SO BEAUTIFUL can you SEE THEM @bizweekgraphics everything is SO BEAUTIFUL can you SEE THEM ➛
May 22, 2013 There is an age where slow, emotive acoustic covers of pop... There is an age where slow, emotive acoustic covers of pop songs seem really cool, and then that age passes. ➛
May 22, 2013 you access it via a yard filled with cats and machine parts @jfruh you access it via a yard filled with cats and machine parts ➛
May 22, 2013 it helps me feel the crushing aloneness that is so... @LATACO it helps me feel the crushing aloneness that is so important to creative work ➛
May 22, 2013 of course michael where do you think i sleep @sippey of course michael where do you think i sleep ➛
May 22, 2013 Since you asked, my standing desk setup. The Drakkar Noir... Since you asked, my standing desk setup. The Drakkar Noir was left here but I keep it as a warning. twitter.com/... ➛
May 22, 2013 i like it because it's one of the few places that welcomes... @anildash @goldman i like it because it's one of the few places that welcomes both masons and rosicrucians ➛
May 22, 2013 i've never been there i'm just going off those videos of A... @goldman @anildash i've never been there i'm just going off those videos of A O Scott and David Carr ➛
May 22, 2013 “Or they kill the rats right after a moment of craving or... “Or they kill the rats right after a moment of craving or copulation.” nytimes.com/... ➛
May 22, 2013 world masters of rat lust a novel forthcoming from fsg world masters of rat lust a novel forthcoming from fsg ➛
May 22, 2013 because they live it, honestly this article on meningitis... @goldman because they live it, honestly this article on meningitis could also describe the Times cafeteria on barley salad day ➛
May 22, 2013 “He stops at a folding table set up between two video... “He stops at a folding table set up between two video screens showing continuous reels of gay pornography.” nytimes.com/... ➛
May 22, 2013 “One of the world’s masters of rat lust is Jim Pfaus...who... “One of the world’s masters of rat lust is Jim Pfaus...who used to sing in a punk band called Mold.” nytimes.com/... ➛
May 22, 2013 hai! i haven't seen it on paper, actually. my big ol' head. @joshm hai! i haven't seen it on paper, actually. my big ol' head. ➛
May 22, 2013 “Though the predator was tender, though he was cherished.”... “Though the predator was tender, though he was cherished.” nytimes.com/... ➛
May 22, 2013 wow it's nice to wake up to tweets saying good job it makes... @TaylorLorenz @jacqui wow it's nice to wake up to tweets saying good job it makes me want to be a better person ➛
May 21, 2013 I like it but that's because sitting causes me to shriek in... @bn2b I like it but that's because sitting causes me to shriek in pain so I'm not a typical user ➛
May 21, 2013 since i hurt my leg i've gone 100% standing desk and [7,000... since i hurt my leg i've gone 100% standing desk and [7,000 tweets deleted] am a superior person ➛
May 21, 2013 just a taste just a little it's cool NO DAMMIT I'M THE... @jlax just a taste just a little it's cool NO DAMMIT I'M THE MAYOR OF AN ENORMOUS GLOBAL CITY but mayor it's crack ➛
May 21, 2013 like, tough couple of days, you're under a lot of stress at... @jlax like, tough couple of days, you're under a lot of stress at work, you ate all the chex mix, and NORMALLY you'd have some crack ➛
May 21, 2013 right but he can totally have those delivered and it would... @jlax right but he can totally have those delivered and it would be cool ➛
May 21, 2013 anyway she was cool and smoking crack is no joke UNLESS you... anyway she was cool and smoking crack is no joke UNLESS you are an insane canadian mayor then i mean come on ➛
May 21, 2013 “Far from just being a PC move, including black people in... “Far from just being a PC move, including black people in the Mad Men universe makes sense in the context o/history.” theroot.com/... ➛
May 21, 2013 i had a friend who was a recovering crack addict and i used... i had a friend who was a recovering crack addict and i used to feel guilty whenever i'd ask ARE YOU SMOKING CRACK, also I knew the answer ➛
May 21, 2013 Hey if you're headed down anyway do you mind making a quick... @MitchellPowers Hey if you're headed down anyway do you mind making a quick detour? ➛
May 21, 2013 I bet Rob Ford really wants some crack right about now. I bet Rob Ford really wants some crack right about now. ➛
May 21, 2013 “Mr. Junge, who was 62 at the time, said the idea that it... “Mr. Junge, who was 62 at the time, said the idea that it could mean whores had not crossed his mind.” nytimes.com/... ➛
May 21, 2013 until we decided to kill ourselves, but that would be the... @rustyk5 @samfbiddle until we decided to kill ourselves, but that would be the best-rated episode ➛
May 21, 2013 truly the best in weeks. rusty can we a sort of statler... @rustyk5 @samfbiddle truly the best in weeks. rusty can we a sort of statler waldorf thing where we judge trolling? ➛
May 21, 2013 i think we all learned something very valuable today i think we all learned something very valuable today ➛
May 21, 2013 i'll come to your house and sing the whole thing @elbrendano i'll come to your house and sing the whole thing ➛
May 21, 2013 and that's funny because that's exactly how i beat together... @fchimero and that's funny because that's exactly how i beat together logs ➛
May 21, 2013 i don't understand the letter that came after y/ and before... @robbiekanner i don't understand the letter that came after y/ and before the ? i've never seen it before ➛
May 21, 2013 bring a bag so you can take your brains home because i am... bring a bag so you can take your brains home because i am going to blow your mind ➛
May 21, 2013 There will be no more questions ever after that keynote in... There will be no more questions ever after that keynote in Minneapolis on June 5. We will all know exactly what to do next. ➛
May 21, 2013 i have a fox puppet and a hedgehog puppet and one of them... i have a fox puppet and a hedgehog puppet and one of them is going to eat the other WHICH ONE confabevents.com/... ➛
May 21, 2013 my closing keynote at 2013 confab in Minneapolis is going... my closing keynote at 2013 confab in Minneapolis is going to make everything totally clear ➛
May 21, 2013 from of my forehead yes that is what i said from of what... from of my forehead yes that is what i said from of what from of are you going to make from of it ➛
May 21, 2013 oh god i have to go the hospital to get my palm extracted... oh god i have to go the hospital to get my palm extracted from of my forehead ➛
May 21, 2013 yep! that's okay, my general sense of inadequacy and... @helenjane yep! that's okay, my general sense of inadequacy and striving will ALWAYS supersede any temporary sense of gratification ➛
May 21, 2013 Oh cool! In what context? My ego wants me to ask you. @helenjane Oh cool! In what context? My ego wants me to ask you. ➛
May 21, 2013 i truly cannot imagine being nonwhite on the internet. or a... @anildash i truly cannot imagine being nonwhite on the internet. or a woman. it would be EVEN MORE exhausting. ➛
May 21, 2013 because tv doesn't have a comments section @anildash because tv doesn't have a comments section ➛
May 21, 2013 anything that threatens my uninhibited flow of images and... anything that threatens my uninhibited flow of images and words that reaffirm my sense of sexual and economic power is basically trolling ➛
May 21, 2013 honestly even bringing up that the internet would prefer it... honestly even bringing up that the internet would prefer it if you didn't bring race up is a little much ➛
May 21, 2013 the internet really would prefer it if you didn't bring up... the internet really would prefer it if you didn't bring up race at all ➛
May 20, 2013 oh hey guys you blew it up goddamn you all to hell well see... oh hey guys you blew it up goddamn you all to hell well see you again tomorrow ➛
May 20, 2013 The Internet is finding the Statue of Liberty buried on the... The Internet is finding the Statue of Liberty buried on the beach EVERY DAY. ➛
May 20, 2013 guys I am not in the picture don't drag me into this @anildash @mathowie @jakedobkin @djacobs @goldman guys I am not in the picture don't drag me into this ➛
May 20, 2013 my doctor is very trusting and very busy at once @rustyk5 my doctor is very trusting and very busy at once ➛
May 20, 2013 it's been a few hours so maybe I'm detoxing @rustyk5 it's been a few hours so maybe I'm detoxing ➛
May 20, 2013 This train car for instance is filled with the vilest... This train car for instance is filled with the vilest bastards on earth and the Manhattan Bridge would do us a service by collapsing now. ➛
May 20, 2013 I'm incredibly angry for no clear reason. I can't tell... I'm incredibly angry for no clear reason. I can't tell whether it's because of the Internet, or SoHo, or that I'm on all this codeine. ➛
May 20, 2013 I don't dismiss anyone but I reserve the right to be... @vicdamone1979 I don't dismiss anyone but I reserve the right to be exasperated ➛
May 20, 2013 sure many are great, but many are patronizing assholes @vicdamone1979 sure many are great, but many are patronizing assholes ➛
May 20, 2013 I am judging the show not the characters @vicdamone1979 I am judging the show not the characters ➛
May 20, 2013 It's not that the comments are patronizing or offensive;... It's not that the comments are patronizing or offensive; that's part of my job. It's watching people unknowingly humilate themselves. ➛
May 20, 2013 I almost wrote a different piece because I knew the... I almost wrote a different piece because I knew the comments would be a shitshow. But then, you know, fuck it. ➛
May 20, 2013 It's Mad Men Monday! http://www.slate.com/articles/arts/tv_c... It's Mad Men Monday! slate.com/... ➛
May 19, 2013 the best part is just one percent of death is still an... @anya1anya the best part is just one percent of death is still an amazing amount of death ➛
May 19, 2013 you have to say something 10,000 times to turn into guy... @inthefade you have to say something 10,000 times to turn into guy kawasaki ➛
May 19, 2013 dear human language we are sorry sincerely technology dear human language we are sorry sincerely technology ➛
May 19, 2013 say monetize eyeballs say it see what happens say monetize eyeballs say it see what happens ➛
May 19, 2013 “‘The challenge has always been, how do you monetize... “‘The challenge has always been, how do you monetize eyeballs?’ said blargle blargle blargle blargle.” nytimes.com/... ➛
May 19, 2013 you must sleep john you must be strong for tomorrow @jwherrman you must sleep john you must be strong for tomorrow ➛
May 19, 2013 There is no worse waste of time than worrying about someone... There is no worse waste of time than worrying about someone else's money. ➛
May 19, 2013 rob what is that it is BEAUTIFUL @robdubbin @helvetica @ra rob what is that it is BEAUTIFUL ➛
May 19, 2013 It's true, it's one of Brooklyn's easiest-to-ruin parks,... @harrisj It's true, it's one of Brooklyn's easiest-to-ruin parks, and hardly gets any credit for that. ➛
May 19, 2013 sounds euphemistic then again what doesn't? @rustyk5 sounds euphemistic then again what doesn't? ➛
May 19, 2013 Prospect Park makes just $75k from GoogaMooga.... Prospect Park makes just $75k from GoogaMooga. cityroom.blogs.nytimes.com/... Could we get 1000 people to give $75 and stop this nonsense? ➛
May 19, 2013 distract him. show him how to build a publishing platform. @rustyk5 distract him. show him how to build a publishing platform. ➛
May 19, 2013 true the hospital makes it a royal pain to return them,... @rustyk5 true the hospital makes it a royal pain to return them, pretty much the worst customer service ever ➛
May 18, 2013 ❤💚💜💙💛❤💚💜💛💘💞💖💕💓💛💙💜💚❤💚💙💛💓💖💞💘❤💘💞💙💕💚... @xxbobbyzxx ❤💚💜💙💛❤💚💜💛💘💞💖💕💓💛💙💜💚❤💚💙💛💓💖💞💘❤💘💞💙💕💚💜💙💙💚💜💜 ➛
May 18, 2013 What happens when you call off a brand engagement? Who... What happens when you call off abrand engagement? Who keeps the impact? ➛
May 18, 2013 First you allow gay marriage and now millions of people are... First you allow gay marriage and now millions of people are engaged with brands. ➛
May 18, 2013 well, three months is four years according to my cat... @kevinweil well, three months is four years according to my cat calculator, so I don't want to push it ➛
May 18, 2013 HR just rejected my request for three months caternity... HR just rejected my request for three months caternity leave. ➛
May 18, 2013 I just learned the word “whitesplaining.” Let me tell you... I just learned the word “whitesplaining.” Let me tell you what it means. ➛
May 17, 2013 I'm always in awe of anyone who has packages in repositories @shabbychef I'm always in awe of anyone who has packages in repositories ➛
May 17, 2013 “Everyone loves sponsored content because it is the best... “Everyone loves sponsored content because it is the best and so fucking cool, sources everywhere say.” theonion.com/... ➛
May 17, 2013 The worst part of the air sex competition is when people... The worst part of the air sex competition is when people just cry for two minutes. ➛
May 17, 2013 “you must have at least one invisible person (or object)... “you must have at least one invisible person (or object) that you are making love to.” airsexworld.com #highschool ➛
May 17, 2013 I'm at tweet 10001 it's a beautiful palindrome so i'm going... @finn I'm at tweet 10001 it's a beautiful palindrome so i'm going to leave it that way forever ➛
May 17, 2013 Turns out that was my 10,000th tweet so I need to go ask... @finn @djacobs Turns out that was my 10,000th tweet so I need to go ask for more quota, see you guys later ➛
May 17, 2013 you need to open a new ticket and we can maybe work it into... @finn @djacobs you need to open a new ticket and we can maybe work it into sprint 355-B ➛
May 17, 2013 katie i know it's friday but come on @katienotopoulos @rustyk5 katie i know it's friday but come on ➛
May 17, 2013 and let's be honest they don't work all that hard @mize and let's be honest they don't work all that hard ➛
May 17, 2013 greg do you know where i can get crack @gknauss greg do you know where i can get crack ➛
May 17, 2013 that is a perfectly perennial thing to say, actually @katienotopoulos @rustyk5 that is a perfectly perennial thing to say, actually ➛
May 17, 2013 and me alas i cannot front also saying "front" is a... @katienotopoulos @rustyk5 and me alas i cannot front also saying "front" is a perennial thing to do ➛
May 17, 2013 like someone over 30 who snapchats, that's a Perennial... @katienotopoulos like someone over 30 who snapchats, that's a Perennial @rustyk5 @rustyk5 @rustyk5 @rustyk5 @rustyk5 @rustyk5 @rustyk5 ➛
May 17, 2013 I'm thinking it's someone over 30 who spends too much time... @katienotopoulos I'm thinking it's someone over 30 who spends too much time on social networks. ➛
May 17, 2013 mine too especially with this deviated septum @evankindley mine too especially with this deviated septum ➛
May 17, 2013 Just about every conversation with a Perennial ends with... Just about every conversation with a Perennial ends with the words "neti pot." ➛
May 17, 2013 Perennials are the generation that uses Facebook and... Perennials are the generation that uses Facebook and Twitter to complain about their sinuses. ➛
May 17, 2013 “We stood, naked, before each other with no secrets, no... “We stood, naked, before each other with no secrets, no rules, and no shame.” wired.com/... ➛
May 17, 2013 You should have seen the two paragraphs I just had to kill.... You should have seen the two paragraphs I just had to kill. I felt like Richard III with his nephews. ➛
May 17, 2013 you know what they say about writing eighth draft's the... you know what they say about writing eighth draft's the charm ➛
May 16, 2013 something something Etobicoke nah forget it something something Etobicoke nah forget it ➛
May 16, 2013 Come now crack addiction in a mayor is serious. Also there... @harrisj Come now crack addiction in a mayor is serious. Also there are NO funny crack puns I'm wracking my brain. ➛
May 16, 2013 Let's not play "Vollman says" or we'll end up on freight... @matthunte Let's not play "Vollman says" or we'll end up on freight trains smoking up with crusties ➛
May 16, 2013 Toronto Mayor Rob Ford Smokes Crack... Toronto Mayor Rob Ford Smokes Crack gawker.com/... ➛
May 16, 2013 http://wry.me/hacking/Turing-Drawings/#4 @robdubbin #4" target="_blank" rel="noopener">http://wry.me/hacking/Turing-Drawings/#4 ➛
May 16, 2013 I'm unable to really enjoy strong tea because I have steep... @Tulletilsynet I'm unable to really enjoy strong tea because I have steep apnea ➛
May 16, 2013 I was going to take a covert photo of this weird-looking... I was going to take a covert photo of this weird-looking woman on the bus but I couldn't because I have creep apnea ➛
May 16, 2013 Truth is, we do get 50 down, 15 up from Optimum. @maureenflaherty @anildash Truth is, we do get 50 down, 15 up from Optimum. ➛
May 16, 2013 sometimes i want to believe in god just to spite these... @rustyk5 sometimes i want to believe in god just to spite these people ➛
May 15, 2013 “I have never in my life seen such a swollen pelvic bone.”... “I have never in my life seen such a swollen pelvic bone.” ibtimes.co.uk/... ➛
May 15, 2013 Oh wow, congrats Nick that's great [dabs eyes with... @anildash @nicknotned Oh wow, congrats Nick that's great [dabs eyes with handkerchief]. ➛
May 15, 2013 plus the extra 100 lbs and overall gigantism, but this way... @rustyk5 @mattbuchanan plus the extra 100 lbs and overall gigantism, but this way I learn! ➛
May 15, 2013 I need to finish a very complicated 3,000 word article... @rustyk5 @mattbuchanan I need to finish a very complicated 3,000 word article today so, i mean, it's a world of privilege and WHOOOOOOOOOOOO ➛
May 15, 2013 sat wrong then biked on it. this is more of a lifetime of... @rustyk5 @mattbuchanan sat wrong then biked on it. this is more of a lifetime of bad decisions thing than a single event. ➛
May 15, 2013 totally sending manuscripts this way @mattbuchanan totally sending manuscripts this way ➛
May 15, 2013 On Court St. there's a yoga studio where the pet... On Court St. there's a yoga studio where the pet crematorium was and I said to my wife “from upward dog to downward dog” anyway I'm single. ➛
May 14, 2013 Tom Buchanan is a cannon dressed as a ghost in the Grape... Tom Buchanan is a cannon dressed as a ghost in the Grape Gatsby. He espouses racist theories and goes whooo and occasionally explodes. ➛
May 14, 2013 Cartoon idea set in the 20s: Nick Carraway is a seed;... Cartoon idea set in the 20s: Nick Carraway is a seed; Myrtle a leaf; Daisy a daisy. Jordan Baker a loaf of bread. Call it The Grape Gatsby. ➛
May 14, 2013 i actually threw that phone out the window @rustyk5 i actually threw that phone out the window ➛
May 14, 2013 for example the top-earning affiliate once won a David Lee... @peterrojas for example the top-earning affiliate once won a David Lee Roth cowboy hat ➛
May 14, 2013 did your copy of THE CDNOW STORY come? I just started to... @peterrojas did your copy of THE CDNOW STORY come? I just started to skim it and it is perhaps THE GREATEST BOOK EVER WRITTEN ➛
May 14, 2013 At Slate TV Club @stevensonseth closes out the week asking:... At Slate TV Club @stevensonseth closes out the week asking: WHO has the plan? slate.com/... ➛
May 14, 2013 “Matthew Weiner has often confessed that he plans this show... “Matthew Weiner has often confessed that he plans this show one season at a time, with no idea what lies beyond.” slate.com/... ➛
May 14, 2013 “He is two bare feet away from becoming a slightly more... “He is two bare feet away from becoming a slightly more with-it Bert Cooper.” slate.com/... ➛
May 14, 2013 "Fragments of Time" by Daft Punk is a great Steely Dan song. "Fragments of Time" by Daft Punk is a great Steely Dan song. ➛
May 14, 2013 Internet tip: If you have to ask “is it too much to ask”... Internet tip: If you have to ask “is it too much to ask” then the answer is always yes. ➛
May 13, 2013 many. Lots of hacky things have been creeping in. Need to... @rustyk5 many. Lots of hacky things have been creeping in. Need to think harder, basically. Structural stuff too. ➛
May 13, 2013 at least that guy.doing karaoke on Leno was real @robdubbin at least that guy.doing karaoke on Leno was real ➛
May 13, 2013 haha oh god no that's like saying there's nothing wrong... @sogrady haha oh god no that's like saying there's nothing wrong with android ➛
May 13, 2013 One of the reasons I've been writing so much lately is to... One of the reasons I've been writing so much lately is to figure out what's wrong with my writing. ➛
May 13, 2013 weirdly-- inverse correlation! I just have the ability to... @abackstrom weirdly-- inverse correlation! I just have the ability to think that way now that I'm solvent. ➛
May 13, 2013 I have a ton of work tonight but all I really want to do is... I have a ton of work tonight but all I really want to do is regress 15 years. ➛
May 13, 2013 Most of the time when I get upset about something the... Most of the time when I get upset about something the easiest fix is to stop paying attention. The rest of the times I should write a check. ➛
May 13, 2013 I was thinking. What we could call the Internet of... @mariabustillos I was thinking. What we could call the Internet of preservationists and digital humanitarians? Then it hit me: The Internet. ➛
May 13, 2013 In the spring of 1918 my wife got a fever and three days... @rustyk5 In the spring of 1918 my wife got a fever and three days later she was dead. #influenzamoments ➛
May 13, 2013 “With the enlargement of a writer's fame comes the... “With the enlargement of a writer's fame comes the lessening of...editorial imperatives to which he must conform.” theawl.com/... ➛
May 13, 2013 “It's the Internet of preservationists and digital... “It's the Internet of preservationists and digital humanitarians, of scholars and intellectuals of all kinds.” theawl.com/... ➛
May 13, 2013 No one will publish this 3,000-word essay I wrote about... No one will publish this 3,000-word essay I wrote about deleting my Klout account. ➛
May 13, 2013 Aaaaaaaaaaaand here are my thoughts on Mad Men for Slate,... Aaaaaaaaaaaand here are my thoughts on Mad Men for Slate, slate.com/... in response to @HannaRosin and preceding @stevensonseth ➛
May 13, 2013 goddammit All Day Pajama Enthusiast is the best blog name... @rustyk5 @lia goddammit All Day Pajama Enthusiast is the best blog name in years ➛
May 13, 2013 Millennials think they INVENTED narcissism when everyone... Millennials think they INVENTED narcissism when everyone knows it was me. ➛
May 13, 2013 I mean there are others [Joan Didion, Annie Dillard, etc.],... @rustyk5 I mean there are others [Joan Didion, Annie Dillard, etc.], but it really is a helluva set of paragraphs. ➛
May 13, 2013 I just reread it this weekend and agree. @rustyk5 I just reread it this weekend and agree. ➛
May 13, 2013 Or a really chubby Eustace Tilley compulsively checking an... @proustian Or a really chubby Eustace Tilley compulsively checking an iPhone. ➛
May 13, 2013 [pops head out from behind tinfoil-covered, door,... @katecrawford @jeanburgess [pops head out from behind tinfoil-covered, door, wild-eyed] EVERYTHING IS CONNECTED [disappears] ➛
May 13, 2013 ohrite YOU would have been all "Bing Crosby's delicate... @bizweekgraphics ohrite YOU would have been all "Bing Crosby's delicate baritone: Recording notes, 1921-1948" ➛
May 13, 2013 Damn straight it does, Drew. Great link, and thanks. @dbreunig Damn straight it does, Drew. Great link, and thanks. ➛
May 13, 2013 Here's something I wrote on how BING CROSBY used NAZI... Here's something I wrote on how BING CROSBY used NAZI TECHNOLOGY to create SILICON VALLEY newyorker.com/... ➛
May 12, 2013 “More married women join http://AshleyMadison.com following... “More married women join ashleymadison.com following Mother's Day than any other day out of the year.” news.com.au/... ➛
May 12, 2013 oh god this geography game http://www.geoguessr.com?v=eyJ0b3... oh god this geography game geoguessr.com ➛
May 11, 2013 Infomercial: A 40-year-old man sticks a pencil in a Sebadoh... Infomercial: A 40-year-old man sticks a pencil in a Sebadoh cassette and tape goes everywhere. Caption: THANKS, MILLENNIALS. ➛
May 11, 2013 I want people to make choices with their hatred. @rustyk5 I want people to make choices with their hatred. ➛
May 11, 2013 I'm working on some writing that just about everyone will... I'm working on some writing that just about everyone will hate at some level. I'm not sorry, just telling you ahead of time. ➛
May 11, 2013 http://i524.photobucket.com/albums/cc322/mamahot_2008/01e429... @rustyk5 i524.photobucket.com/... ➛
May 10, 2013 Also: Mom in a hijab came up to gathering of young men and... Also: Mom in a hijab came up to gathering of young men and pulled her 20-something son away BY HIS EAR. ➛
May 10, 2013 On Coney Island Avenue looking out the window is a good way... On Coney Island Avenue looking out the window is a good way to learn about foreign policy. ➛
May 10, 2013 People waving flags. One guy had PTI painted on the back of... People waving flags. One guy had PTI painted on the back of his hatchback. en.wikipedia.org/... Lots of chanting. Cops came. ➛
May 10, 2013 Ditmas just went bananas over elections in Pakistan,... Ditmas just went bananas over elections in Pakistan, complete with a dude doing wheelies on a motorcycle. ➛
May 10, 2013 I just told my wife I loved and appreciated her. She... I just told my wife I loved and appreciated her. She replied: “Stop procrastinating.” ➛
May 10, 2013 worse I remember liking it while being really excited about... @rustyk5 worse I remember liking it while being really excited about Bill Clinton's nomination ➛
May 8, 2013 so much other software has the features teens need, and... @mattbuchanan so much other software has the features teens need, and none that they don't. i think it'll be okay. ➛
May 8, 2013 “But many Turks still balk at the prospect of surgery to... “But many Turks still balk at the prospect of surgery to thicken one's whiskers. ” online.wsj.com/... ➛
May 8, 2013 “The woman at the desk didn’t take kindly to the tapping:... “The woman at the desk didn’t take kindly to the tapping: ‘Have a little patience, you snotty American brat.’” lrb.co.uk/... ➛
May 8, 2013 too late i egifted him a susan kare panda doll on facebook... @rustyk5 too late i egifted him a susan kare panda doll on facebook it's on ➛
May 8, 2013 it's also entirely possible that email will get him laid @rustyk5 it's also entirely possible that email will get him laid ➛
May 6, 2013 “Faraway is, in many respects, a perfect commuter game.”... “Faraway is, in many respects, a perfect commuter game.” newyorker.com/... ➛
May 6, 2013 “The time bomb in my head” by @MadMelvina... “The time bomb in my head” by @MadMelvina medium.com/...Is great. ➛
May 6, 2013 i think this may be the entire audience for that joke @jimray @mathowie @zeldman i think this may be the entire audience for that joke ➛
May 6, 2013 i hate when they ask what I think because they don't want... @rustyk5 i hate when they ask what I think because they don't want that ➛
May 6, 2013 there's that. i'm really puzzled in general here. @rustyk5 there's that. i'm really puzzled in general here. ➛
May 6, 2013 thank you because it's hard and I am often very confused @rcade thank you because it's hard and I am often very confused ➛
May 6, 2013 “You have delighted us long enough. Let the other young... “You have delighted us long enough. Let the other young ladies have time to exhibit.” ― Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice ➛
May 6, 2013 was timeshifting, will be back in present soon @mat was timeshifting, will be back in present soon ➛
May 6, 2013 “Don’t worry, I’m bringing my iPhone with me.”... “Don’t worry, I’m bringing my iPhone with me.” parislemon.com/... ➛
May 6, 2013 you could probably barely hear the words it would sound... @hmmwhatsthis you could probably barely hear the words it would sound like a mewling kitten ➛
May 6, 2013 and now that i unfollowed everyone it's spring in my heart @mattbuchanan and now that i unfollowed everyone it's spring in my heart ➛
May 6, 2013 “The only people who are resistant are the writers: ‘I’m... “The only people who are resistant are the writers: ‘I’m making art, I can’t possibly do this.’” nytimes.com/... ➛
May 6, 2013 He remembers it as being about the scene where he's getting... @hujane He remembers it as being about the scene where he's getting the body into the trunk and we're rooting for Norman. ➛
May 6, 2013 he's tried truffaut and bogdanovich, no dice @hujane he's tried truffaut and bogdanovich, no dice ➛
May 6, 2013 pretty sure--a friend remembers it as being absolutely... @hujane pretty sure--a friend remembers it as being absolutely about psycho, but we've gone looking and no dice ➛
May 6, 2013 but yeah this punch is less abt guns and more that ingroups... @jackrusher but yeah this punch is less abt guns and more that ingroups are defensive about outgroup incursion ➛
May 6, 2013 I'm trying to source a Hitchcock quote. "The public likes... I'm trying to source a Hitchcock quote. "The public likes to watch a man who's good at his work." About Psycho. Anyone ever seen it? ➛
May 6, 2013 the whole thing is super well-intentioned but then $ also... @tolar @anildash the whole thing is super well-intentioned but then $ also when iOS devs are saying they can't have kids in NYC i panic ➛
May 6, 2013 or a simile, I guess, since contracting is /like/ a... or a simile, I guess, since contracting is /like/ a colonoscopy ➛
May 6, 2013 sometimes a metaphor just gets away from you you know sometimes a metaphor just gets away from you you know ➛
May 6, 2013 “The good thing is that, like a colonoscopy, once the... “The good thing is that, like a colonoscopy, once the remodeling is over, you won’t need another one for years.” opinionator.blogs.nytimes.com/... ➛
May 6, 2013 Oh man @justin_bonanno a Game of Thrones/NYC private school... Oh man @justin_bonanno a Game of Thrones/NYC private school mashup will...probably appear on Vulture in the next six hours. ➛
May 6, 2013 The crazy thing is that I think Avenues is actually the... @brad_frost The crazy thing is that I think Avenues is actually the most earnest of the lot, genuinely trying. NYC makes it hard. ➛
May 6, 2013 “Really, can you put a price on humility?” Would be an... “Really, can you put a price on humility?” Would be an amazing ad slogan for a private school in NYC. ➛
May 6, 2013 which would have been so much more awesome. I'm not looking... @MikeRiggs which would have been so much more awesome. I'm not looking forward to a year of Don selling the Vega. ➛
May 6, 2013 it's a tribal reaction. but a kid killing another with a... @tharsheblows it's a tribal reaction. but a kid killing another with a community-approved gun is bigger than the town/tribe. ➛
May 6, 2013 This NYT article about the $43k/yr Avenues school convinced... This NYT article about the $43k/yr Avenues school convinced me to teach my children humility no matter what the cost. nytimes.com/... ➛
May 6, 2013 “Privileged parents want to control everything in their... “Privileged parents want to control everything in their kids’ lives.” nytimes.com/... ➛
May 6, 2013 My answer to should we arm our very small children is... My answer to should we arm our very small children is punching this reporter in the face. ➛
May 6, 2013 if everyone starts looking things up i'm screwed @MikeRiggs if everyone starts looking things up i'm screwed ➛
May 6, 2013 “Two other men told a newspaper reporter, ‘If you had any... “Two other men told a newspaper reporter, ‘If you had any sense, you’d get out of here. You’re next, buddy.’” nytimes.com/... ➛
May 6, 2013 And now I await @HannaRosin and @stevensonseth responses.... And now I await @HannaRosin and @stevensonseth responses. This is the inviolable nature of Slate TV Club, founded in 1749. #funfact ➛
May 6, 2013 I don't get much credit for positing; they talk about the... @MikeRiggs I don't get much credit for positing; they talk about the "XP-887" and Google gets you to the Vega pretty quick from there. ➛
May 6, 2013 Heyyyyy good morning would you like my thoughts on Mad Men... Heyyyyy good morning would you likemy thoughts on Mad Men slate.com/... ➛
May 3, 2013 One thing about Scatman John is that he really tried to... One thing about Scatman John is that he really tried to touch people with his scat. But for a long time no one would pick up his scat. ➛
May 3, 2013 here is one of the songs i discussed on soundcheck today... here is one of the songs i discussed on soundcheck today you should watch the video youtube.com/... c.f. soundcheck.wnyc.org/... ➛
May 3, 2013 If you haven't heard enough of my voice, here I am on... If you haven't heard enough of my voice, here I am on Soundcheck (airs tonight) soundcheck.wnyc.org/... ➛
May 3, 2013 It's a lot shorter now it's just a picture of a cop... It's a lot shorter now it's just a picture of a cop carrying a weird-looking pig but it preserved your voice I think, omg the pig's face ➛
May 3, 2013 I didn't edit it so much as social media edit it. I didn't edit it so much as social media edit it. ➛
May 3, 2013 Here is a link to the complete broadcast day from 1939... Here is a link to the complete broadcast day from 1939 archive.org/... ➛
May 3, 2013 I'm on a poddddcasssstt with @zeldman guys guys... I'm on a poddddcasssstt with @zeldman guys guys zeldman.com/... ➛
May 2, 2013 I went and looked and remember so little of that. I was... @gknauss I went and looked and remember so little of that. I was actually a little out of my mind then. ➛
May 2, 2013 After many years of marriage my wife just blurted out that... After many years of marriage my wife just blurted out that she once had a Fidonet address. ➛
May 2, 2013 This tweet goes out to all the ladies on the BM2 bus just... This tweet goes out to all the ladies on the BM2 bus just pulling in at Cortelyou. ➛
May 2, 2013 right in the solar plexus eh Alice @alicedubois @harrisj @nyt_mouse @freshfreecoffee right in the solar plexus eh Alice ➛
May 2, 2013 I would really put it as your primary skill @harrisj @alicedubois I would really put it as your primary skill ➛
May 2, 2013 michael stop I can't have opinions. medically I mean @michaelroston michael stop I can't have opinions. medically I mean ➛
May 2, 2013 I wrote that last tweet because I want everyone to know its... I wrote that last tweet because I want everyone to know its okay to not be funny all the time. ➛
May 2, 2013 I've been thinking strategically all day and boy we should... I've been thinking strategically all day and boy we should stop flapping our arms and switch to fixed-wing aircraft. ➛
May 2, 2013 If something is going to go out to all the ladies chances... If something is going to go out to all the ladies chances are I'm going to like it a lot. ➛
May 2, 2013 Actually I do have an opinion. I like things that go out to... Actually I do have an opinion. I like things that go out to all the ladies. ➛
May 2, 2013 not easy to type that on a phone I want you to know @rustyk5 not easy to type that on a phone I want you to know ➛
May 2, 2013 seriously she nearly got me beat up yesterday @rustyk5 @katienotopoulos seriously she nearly got me beat up yesterday ➛
May 2, 2013 Can someone assign a "know your Carrs" piece so I can keep... Can someone assign a "know your Carrs" piece so I can keep all the various Carrs writing about media straight? A Carr Crash course. ➛
May 2, 2013 I'm okay with being mixed up with the same guy who wrote... @1000camels I'm okay with being mixed up with the same guy who wrote the Bible and War and Peace. Wait ➛
May 1, 2013 I'm only going to tweet using Bookworm Adventures words... I'm only going to tweet using Bookworm Adventures words from now on, so pod rod yore zap dun zip ran, qua dun wool dire. ➛
May 1, 2013 yeah i kind of welcome that one @anildash @thelancearthur @tomcoates yeah i kind of welcome that one ➛
May 1, 2013 tom we contain multitudes, multitudes of sandwiches @tomcoates tom we contain multitudes, multitudes of sandwiches ➛
May 1, 2013 National Organization for Marriage I am in you. National Organization for Marriage I am in you. ➛
May 1, 2013 I don't like when people go places and tweet "I am in you."... I don't like when people go places and tweet "I am in you." It needly sexualizes Minneapolis, for example. ➛
May 1, 2013 Working in an office with my wife this morning. Shit got... Working in an office with my wife this morning. Shit got real fast. After I send that email yes maybe I should floss. ➛
May 1, 2013 1PM back to back intvws but around and back tomorrow too @shani_o 1PM back to back intvws but around and back tomorrow too ➛
May 1, 2013 if that dude from Path made an app that helped people hate... if that dude from Path made an app that helped people hate people less it would benefit him in two ways ➛
May 1, 2013 sorry it's too late you're writing that for O'Reilly now @anildash sorry it's too late you're writing that for O'Reilly now ➛
May 1, 2013 i was at hate 3,000 but then i installed hatestrom it helps... i was at hate 3,000 but then i installed hatestrom it helps me categorize the things and people i hate so that i can "deal with them" ➛
May 1, 2013 why would you even I'm 26 and hanging out with my neighbor... @anildash why would you even I'm 26 and hanging out with my neighbor drinking budweiser and LILLLAAAAC WINNNEEEEE ➛
May 1, 2013 my #1 productivity tip is to batch your hating into... my #1 productivity tip is to batch your hating into manageable chunks until you get to hate zero ➛
May 1, 2013 [walks by library, starts crying, slow pan to sled named... @nathandeuel @dankois @Choire @anildash [walks by library, starts crying, slow pan to sled named rosebud, zoom out IT'S ALL ON HIS PHONE] ➛
May 1, 2013 you're right it's like something...happened in the late 90s... @nathandeuel @dankois @Choire @anildash you're right it's like something...happened in the late 90s that made us forget...but...WHAT ➛
May 1, 2013 how many chins is too many asking for a friend how many chins is too many asking for a friend ➛
May 1, 2013 no god the dude threw big killer rocks into the air with... @nathandeuel @dankois @Choire @anildash no god the dude threw big killer rocks into the air with his ancient war machine it's awesome ➛
May 1, 2013 imagine hating just one or two people at a time and not... imagine hating just one or two people at a time and not being able to talk about it all the time how did we even survive ➛
May 1, 2013 Today, as an exercise, I'm going to imagine what it's like... Today, as an exercise, I'm going to imagine what it's like for people who don't dick around all day on the Internet professionally. ➛
May 1, 2013 “Upstairs, workers earned as little as $40 a month making... “Upstairs, workers earned as little as $40 a month making clothes for retailers like J. C. Penney.” nytimes.com/... ➛
May 1, 2013 That wasn't even the "perhaps" kicker I was talking about. That wasn't even the "perhaps" kicker I was talking about. ➛
May 1, 2013 Something I wrote about hardware emulation for Hemispheres,... Something I wrote about hardware emulation for Hemispheres, the inflight mag of United: hemispheresmagazine.com/... ➛
Apr 30, 2013 [Oslo prefers to import English garbage over Italian... [Oslo prefers to import English garbage over Italian garbage.] “‘It’s a sensitive question,’ Mr. Mikkelsen said.” nytimes.com/... ➛
Apr 30, 2013 Man musicians make you feel for the major labels sometimes. Man musicians make you feel for the major labels sometimes. ➛
Apr 30, 2013 “Because in my view, in this business which is totally... “Because in my view, in this business which is totally talent-driven, it’s about horses, not races.” deadline.com/... ➛