Ftrain, by Paul Ford

September 2012

Sep 30, 2012

Still too many choices. I would argue for just "yuk," or...

@jeb @BuzzFeed Still too many choices. I would argue for just "yuk," or for sentiment analysis of my tweets to decide for me.
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Sep 27, 2012

So the core data unit in the Semantic Web is called a...

@advancereality So the core data unit in the Semantic Web is called a triple: 1,2,3 Subject, Predicate, Object. #John #hasFriend #Jim.
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Sep 27, 2012

it just watched it all the way through it is perfect madness

@matthewmcvickar it just watched it all the way through it is perfect madness
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Sep 26, 2012

still too much work. i want it to automatically endorse...

@michaelroston still too much work. i want it to automatically endorse people based on me making soft grunt noises during a nap
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Sep 26, 2012

i'm too busy to read that tweet what video is it

@rustyk5 @jschauma i'm too busy to read that tweet what video is it
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Sep 26, 2012

I don't have time to download that what is it

@rustyk5 @jschauma I don't have time to download that what is it
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Sep 26, 2012

squinting and slow-nodding

@rustyk5 squinting and slow-nodding
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Sep 26, 2012

If I had a magazine about the Semantic Web I would call it...

If I had a magazine about the Semantic Web I would call it TRIPLE THREAT.
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Sep 26, 2012

oh god i pivoted wrong...and now I...is that my liver...i...

@AlexGraul @Mike_FTW oh god i pivoted wrong...and now I...is that my liver...i see...(λ f:(λ x:f(λ v:x(x)(v)))(λ x:f(λ v:x(x)(v))))
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Sep 26, 2012

Too late I'm with brand perception now.

@Mike_FTW Too late I'm with brand perception now.
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Sep 26, 2012

It was always thus. I call it "kissing the hoof."

@Mike_FTW It was always thus. I call it "kissing the hoof."
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Sep 26, 2012

This is suspiciously true.

@morrick This is suspiciously true.
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Sep 26, 2012

Yeah it's a lot worse than I even remembered. It's from...

@ScrewsHampden Yeah it's a lot worse than I even remembered. It's from 2000 but more 90s than Windows 95.
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Sep 26, 2012

Who are the really smart small brand strategy and...

Who are the really smart small brand strategy and communications shops in NYC right now WHO I MUST KNOW.
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Sep 26, 2012

In my head since yesterday: Come come my lady.

In my head since yesterday: Come come my lady.
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Sep 25, 2012

we have to watch the smoking (pause for "I don't smoke")...

@tcarmody we have to watch the smoking (pause for "I don't smoke") BLAM BLAM BLAM blows pistol smoke who said anything about you
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Sep 25, 2012

has there ever been a movie where a spy pretends to be a...

has there ever been a movie where a spy pretends to be a doctor and tells a dude YOU HAVE 10 SECONDS TO LIVE and kills him? cuz cool.
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Sep 25, 2012

I KNOW FUCK THOSE PEOPLE

@tcarmody I KNOW FUCK THOSE PEOPLE
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Sep 25, 2012

ten years ago we all would have been ashamed of gangam style

ten years ago we all would have been ashamed of gangam style
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Sep 25, 2012

My life is my art, which is why I'm so afraid of...

My life is my art, which is why I'm so afraid of deaccession.
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Sep 25, 2012

just show up in a sweater

@poundifdef just show up in a sweater
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Sep 25, 2012

"Tech scene staples" are what I like to pound into my...

"Tech scene staples" are what I like to pound into my eyeballs. betabeat.com/...
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Sep 25, 2012

This sudden memory of all the suits that I wore out of the...

This sudden memory of all the suits that I wore out of the store.
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Sep 24, 2012

no I have to blog this it's impo

@Mike_FTW no I have to blog this it's impo
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Sep 24, 2012

I just woke up thinking that a cupcake is a cake for an...

I just woke up thinking that a cupcake is a cake for an attention economy.
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Sep 24, 2012

the thirteen ways we die alone

@meaghano the thirteen ways we die alone
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Sep 24, 2012

the five main reasons to just accept it

@meaghano the five main reasons to just accept it
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Sep 24, 2012

I told you, enumerating!

@meaghano I told you, enumerating!
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Sep 24, 2012

Oh man the Harbor Bay sample sale is a real downer.

Oh man the Harbor Bay sample sale is a real downer.
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Sep 24, 2012

you didn't stay for the after party

@tolar you didn't stay for the after party
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Sep 24, 2012

The top 25 things I cling to

The top 25 things I cling to
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Sep 24, 2012

the top one @tolar s at Buzzfeed!

@tolar the top one @tolar s at Buzzfeed!
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Sep 24, 2012

100 portraits of suffering BUT just link to mirrorproject

@mathowie @buzzfeed 100 portraits of suffering BUT just link to mirrorproject
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Sep 24, 2012

the ten most sincere cries for help

@mathowie @buzzfeed the ten most sincere cries for help
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Sep 24, 2012

At the @buzzfeed offices tonight I kept enumerating things....

At the @buzzfeed offices tonight I kept enumerating things. These are the three best urinals at Buzzfeed. Etc.
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Sep 24, 2012

Nothing says lifetime of bad choices like a changing-room...

Nothing says lifetime of bad choices like a changing-room mirror.
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Sep 24, 2012

Impressed that the Atlantic had the foresight to create a...

Impressed that the Atlantic had the foresight to create a new url shortener at qz.com #verticals #biz #truth
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Sep 24, 2012

Hah. I was thinking of something entirely annoying about...

@smnevans Hah. I was thinking of something entirely annoying about Pepsi.
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Sep 24, 2012

Who will speak for the brands?

Who will speak for the brands?
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Sep 23, 2012

"It won't be called 'reform and opening up' because it...

@michaelroston "It won't be called 'reform and opening up' because it sounds like 'dog fart' in Korean," the source said.
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Sep 22, 2012

I think it's just being Irish in New England.

@gnat I think it's just being Irish in New England.
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Sep 22, 2012

Every time my wife and I stay in a nice hotel we get...

Every time my wife and I stay in a nice hotel we get mistaken for the help. Desk here just told her that she could use the service elevator.
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Sep 22, 2012

something about a door being wrong. They've been around for...

@moth something about a door being wrong. They've been around for a while. NYC. Sigh.
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Sep 21, 2012

Sold and done.

@hmason Sold and done.
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Sep 21, 2012

Suggestions for breakfast near downtown Providence (with...

Suggestions for breakfast near downtown Providence (with babies)?
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Sep 21, 2012

And just like that the city shut down our awesome daycare....

And just like that the city shut down our awesome daycare. Anyone in Ditmas know a place that takes under-2s for a few days a week?
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Sep 19, 2012

readings headline meeting is tomorrow bill

@billwasik readings headline meeting is tomorrow bill
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Sep 19, 2012

i guess it's better than the old bk where people threw...

@papertyger i guess it's better than the old bk where people threw bottles at you?
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Sep 19, 2012

Brooklyn. It has come to this. https://twitter.com/ftrain/st...

Brooklyn. It has come to this. twitter.com/...
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Sep 19, 2012

I want to be known as a revisionary.

I want to be known as a revisionary.
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Sep 19, 2012

When I look at this picture I feel like the dealer in the...

When I look at this picture I feel like the dealer in the world's weirdest blackjack game nytimes.com/...
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Sep 19, 2012

If you think this is steamy wait until you read the sequel,...

If you think this is steamy wait until you read the sequel, *Security Audit.* twitter.com/...
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Sep 19, 2012

quora i don't even http://www.quora.com/Do-silverfish-eat-hu...

quora i don't even quora.com/...
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Sep 19, 2012

Coffeescript writes better JavaScript than I do.

Coffeescript writes better JavaScript than I do.
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Sep 19, 2012

I was late because I went to the wrong Dizzy's.

@pitchaya I was late because I went to the wrong Dizzy's.
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Sep 18, 2012

Where did you grow up? Atlantis?

@kellan Where did you grow up? Atlantis?
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Sep 18, 2012

The kitchen's on fire send more cooks.

The kitchen's on fire send more cooks.
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Sep 17, 2012

In an Internet of shittiness this is the shittiest...

In an Internet of shittiness this is the shittiest wnd.com/...
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Sep 17, 2012

This situation isn't unfair. It's just optimized for rich,...

This situation isn't unfair. It's just optimized for rich, attractive people.
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Sep 17, 2012

the scope of my collection demands it also I need REXX...

@artless the scope of my collection demands it also I need REXX support
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Sep 17, 2012

just add the word social to any one of them and see what...

just add the word social to any one of them and see what happens
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Sep 17, 2012

Look at the great product work poets are doing:...

Look at the great product work poets are doing: poetryfoundation.org/... "An airplane that never lands."
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Sep 17, 2012

isn't everything ignorance management? poets would make...

isn't everything ignorance management? poets would make good ignorance managers. consider this report as pigeons, a feral typewriter.
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Sep 17, 2012

That latest update converted all my ASCII porn to EBCDIC...

That latest update converted all my ASCII porn to EBCDIC and a night of steamy scrolling has turned into a lesson in codepages.
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Sep 17, 2012

i also have a serious criticism which is that that mormon...

@bizweekgraphics i also have a serious criticism which is that that mormon cover was deeply lacking in ascii weenus
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Sep 17, 2012

Ignorance Management is a thing....

Ignorance Management is a thing. en.wikipedia.org/... I would enjoy being the Chief Ignorance Officer at an organization, or CIO.
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Sep 17, 2012

“It's Susan now.” http://mlkshk.com/r/JEZA

“It's Susan now.” mlkshk.com/...
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Sep 17, 2012

““Start on the image of all the white babies!””...

““Start on the image of all the white babies!”” vulture.com/...
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Sep 17, 2012

“But nothing ever seems to get better here.”...

“But nothing ever seems to get better here.” nytimes.com/...
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Sep 16, 2012

Silence purchased with Cheerios is still silence.

Silence purchased with Cheerios is still silence.
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Sep 16, 2012

I kept saying "paralyze" when I meant to say "parallelize"...

I kept saying "paralyze" when I meant to say "parallelize" and it turns out I wasn't wrong.
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Sep 15, 2012

I came here to chew bubblegum, and I have a LOT of...

I came here to chew bubblegum, and I have a LOT of bubblegum.
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Sep 15, 2012

Would meth help me organize my Dropbox? Because I'm...

Would meth help me organize my Dropbox? Because I'm desperate.
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Sep 15, 2012

You mean like when Beanwulf defeats Lentel?

@timbray @kissane You mean like when Beanwulf defeats Lentel?
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Sep 15, 2012

Nice playground but will it scale?

Nice playground but will it scale?
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Sep 15, 2012

Building an Internet business is easy. Just find something...

Building an Internet business is easy. Just find something fun and make it suck.
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Sep 15, 2012

the fact that spotify has a karaoke version of cantaloop by...

the fact that spotify has a karaoke version of cantaloop by US3 helps me imagine the most awkward night out possible
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Sep 15, 2012

right aside from the omnipresent fear of death i like the...

@tharsheblows right aside from the omnipresent fear of death i like the way things make WAY more sense and are in general funnier
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Sep 15, 2012

Wait us3 is collaborating with akala? england what is...

Wait us3 is collaborating with akala? england what is happening?
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Sep 15, 2012

same here but peter gabriel concert where he does like 30...

@dankois same here but peter gabriel concert where he does like 30 minutes of in your eyes with youssou n'dour
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Sep 15, 2012

we're pushing this shit all the way we're going to 120...

@dankois we're pushing this shit all the way we're going to 120 minutes
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Sep 15, 2012

It's already meaningful.

@paul_haine It's already meaningful.
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Sep 15, 2012

your lie just described my entire validation-seeking 20s...

@tharsheblows your lie just described my entire validation-seeking 20s and early 30s. this bathroom is going to get CLEAN.
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Sep 15, 2012

I worked as the web person at Harper's and so this all got...

@tharsheblows I worked as the web person at Harper's and so this all got worked out of my system so bad. Bring me Katy Perry.
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Sep 15, 2012

The other song that really works for bathroom-cleaning is...

The other song that really works for bathroom-cleaning is "Cry Little Sister."
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Sep 15, 2012

My INXS mix tape (on Chromium cassette) consists of Kick...

@dankois My INXS mix tape (on Chromium cassette) consists of Kick minus GITS plus Not Enough Time. ALL BETTER.
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Sep 15, 2012

Down that path and suddenly you're listening to whole...

@tharsheblows Down that path and suddenly you're listening to whole Simple Minds albums.
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Sep 15, 2012

Which means I have been skipping over "Guns in the Sky" for...

Which means I have been skipping over "Guns in the Sky" for more than 20 years.
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Sep 15, 2012

I have used INXS's Kick as bathroom-cleaning music for over...

I have used INXS's Kick as bathroom-cleaning music for over 20 years.
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Sep 14, 2012

The source for a golang Tetris includes unicode box...

The source for a golang Tetris includes unicode box drawings, because you know the source is always UTF-8 github.com/...
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Sep 14, 2012

Installing Ubuntu on an iMac feels great. It's like I pull...

Installing Ubuntu on an iMac feels great. It's like I pull up in my Escalade, you look in, and see a dozen drunken monkeys and no driver.
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Sep 14, 2012

right around then the entire culture confused "freedom"...

right around then the entire culture confused "freedom" with "options"
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Sep 14, 2012

I'm moving to the cloud

@mattlanger I'm moving to the cloud
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Sep 14, 2012

Timeline generated with a google docs backend...

Timeline generated with a google docs backend #explorer" target="_blank" rel="noopener">http://timeliner.reclinejs.com/?backend=gdocs&url=https://docs.google.com/spreadsheet/ccc?key=0Aon3JiuouxLUdFROanhQOVh0NUhyOXNxRDdkc0tEZFE%23gid=0#explorer
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Sep 14, 2012

That's a lousy date for a wedding. You should have taken a...

@inthefade That's a lousy date for a wedding. You should have taken a person.
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Sep 14, 2012

This page is basically the Android naming convention...

This page is basically the Android naming convention roadmap pinterest.com/...
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Sep 14, 2012

Little Debbie wedding cakes, etc, on Pinterest:...

Little Debbie wedding cakes, etc, on Pinterest: pinterest.com/...
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Sep 14, 2012

Whoa http://okfnlabs.org/ is awesome.

Whoa okfnlabs.org is awesome.
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Sep 13, 2012

now you're just making shit up

@sean_oneill now you're just making shit up
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Sep 13, 2012

Just about sweater vest season get ready ladies.

Just about sweater vest season get ready ladies.
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Sep 13, 2012

one thing I've learned as a consultant is never argue with...

@mpawlo one thing I've learned as a consultant is never argue with a man in a blazer
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Sep 13, 2012

I'm addicted to cognitive behavioral therapy. Now what?

I'm addicted to cognitive behavioral therapy. Now what?
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Sep 13, 2012

I obsess over my deviations from the norm, and yet for my...

I obsess over my deviations from the norm, and yet for my friends those are a footnote to the list of reasons that they love me.
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Sep 13, 2012

well this went in a delightful infrastructural direction. i...

@megnut @delfuego @mathowie @ev well this went in a delightful infrastructural direction. i love center pivots.
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Sep 13, 2012

is that possible? Because I'll start trying.

@evanmcc is that possible? Because I'll start trying.
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Sep 13, 2012

Nothing complicated. Me: Do you miss Lebanon? Him: What is...

Nothing complicated. Me: Do you miss Lebanon? Him: What is your salary at your job? A nice trip. Spreadsheets to bed.
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Sep 13, 2012

Cabbie a Lebanese guy fired from AT&T a few years ago....

Cabbie a Lebanese guy fired from AT&T a few years ago. Lives in Bay Ridge 15 yrs. Nearly moved home but loves BK. I tipped 50%.
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Sep 12, 2012

Seriously guys XML is too verbose but TechCrunch is okay?

Seriously guys XML is too verbose but TechCrunch is okay?
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Sep 12, 2012

wait--that's NOT why I called you--wait a minute

@ryanirelan wait--that's NOT why I called you--wait a minute
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Sep 12, 2012

close the door behind you we need to talk

@ryanirelan close the door behind you we need to talk
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Sep 12, 2012

oh god exactly. i have fantasies of the bus that runs from...

@matthewmcvickar oh god exactly. i have fantasies of the bus that runs from penn station to the cloisters.
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Sep 12, 2012

On the other hand are inscribed the words I will say at my...

On the other hand are inscribed the words I will say at my death. It reads:On the other hand are inscribed the words I will say at my death.
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Sep 12, 2012

On one hand, if I take the train it takes forever, but i...

On one hand, if I take the train it takes forever, but i won't have to be online.
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Sep 12, 2012

On that note, I refer to changing the twins' diapers as...

@mathowie On that note, I refer to changing the twins' diapers as "the daily deploy."
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Sep 12, 2012

asynchronous callbacks, socks, deciding between cab or...

asynchronous callbacks, socks, deciding between cab or train, all podcasts, personal brands, wisdom teeth, salt
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Sep 12, 2012

god i hate a lot of things tonight. like doubled adjectival...

god i hate a lot of things tonight. like doubled adjectival phrases i.e. "The Accidental Music of Imperfect Escalators"
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Sep 12, 2012

In the mirror every day I want you to say to yourself "no...

In the mirror every day I want you to say to yourself "no more verticals."
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Sep 12, 2012

what does twitter have to do with writing?

@poundifdef what does twitter have to do with writing?
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Sep 12, 2012

If I had a writing career I'd totally be giving up on it...

If I had a writing career I'd totally be giving up on it tonight.
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Sep 12, 2012

Next person who mentions Radiolab dies.

Next person who mentions Radiolab dies.
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Sep 12, 2012

Keeping a journal as I go though, which I'll post.

@davewiner Keeping a journal as I go though, which I'll post.
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Sep 12, 2012

bad luck to talk about unfinished projects. it's just a...

@davewiner bad luck to talk about unfinished projects. it's just a dumb hack but i'm using it to learn about data models in the wild.
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Sep 12, 2012

i'm on week three of developing my bookmarklet. the wild...

i'm on week three of developing my bookmarklet. the wild DOM is cruel and wily. why didn't you people use XML?
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Sep 12, 2012

i pay net 3650

@artless i pay net 3650
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Sep 12, 2012

Congratulations to Evil and the entire Evil team! You...

Congratulations to Evil and the entire Evil team! You really worked for your success.
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Sep 12, 2012

Each test case is getting a "priority" column ranked 1/2/3...

Each test case is getting a "priority" column ranked 1/2/3 with conditional formatting in different colors because YOLO.
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Sep 12, 2012

I was BORN legacy.

@djacobs I was BORN legacy.
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Sep 12, 2012

just had an argument over whether it's legacy enterprise or...

just had an argument over whether it's legacy enterprise or enterprise legacy
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Sep 12, 2012

thank lowercase god indeed

@jd87 thank lowercase god indeed
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Sep 12, 2012

“What do you recommend for parsing tweets?”...

“What do you recommend for parsing tweets?” #ca" target="_blank" rel="noopener">http://nlp.stanford.edu/software/parser-faq.shtml#ca
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Sep 11, 2012

for obvious reasons hooters counts every woman twice

@danielpunkass for obvious reasons hooters counts every woman twice
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Sep 11, 2012

Criminal is exactly the right word.

@zeldman Criminal is exactly the right word.
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Sep 11, 2012

“According to this theory, Bin Laden was pretending to be...

“According to this theory, Bin Laden was pretending to be planning an attack to distract from Saddam Hussein.” nytimes.com/...
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Sep 11, 2012

My Terms of Service prohibit this.

My Terms of Service prohibit this.
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Sep 11, 2012

"Guys, vomit is not a toy." Is something I said this...

"Guys, vomit is not a toy." Is something I said this morning as I ran with paper towels.
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Sep 10, 2012

A tension economy

A tension economy
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Sep 10, 2012

“'It’s like an incubator,' says Ryan Turri, a resident and...

“'It’s like an incubator,' says Ryan Turri, a resident and aspiring beef jerky magnate.” businessweek.com/...
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Sep 10, 2012

NYT op-trolling: “A nanny is just what New York City, and...

NYT op-trolling: “A nanny is just what New York City, and the rest of America, needs.” nytimes.com/...
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Sep 10, 2012

“Mr. Pietsch said he accepted the job “after two deep...

“Mr. Pietsch said he accepted the job “after two deep breaths.”” mediadecoder.blogs.nytimes.com/...
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Sep 10, 2012

Dear folks at @oxfordamerican: @rogerdhodge is an excellent...

Dear folks at @oxfordamerican: @rogerdhodge is an excellent boss. I worked for him for six years and loved it. Sincerely, @ftrain
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Sep 10, 2012

if only i had a driver's license i'd be a MONSTER

@samuelclay if only i had a driver's license i'd be a MONSTER
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Sep 10, 2012

Dude I'd put that shit on a T-shirt and then when 9.3 comes...

@samuelclay Dude I'd put that shit on a T-shirt and then when 9.3 comes out be all like "I don't know if this is a step forward."
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Sep 10, 2012

I forgot--its after Labor day, so chubby guys can wear...

I forgot--its after Labor day, so chubby guys can wear cheap plaid shirts again.
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Sep 10, 2012

“There are 2.38 million Joneses in the US but a whopping...

“There are 2.38 million Joneses in the US but a whopping 92.88 million 王s in China.” troyhunt.com/...
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Sep 10, 2012

"Solid and reliable for years," said Samuel Clay, founder...

"Solid and reliable for years," said Samuel Clay,
founder of newsblur.com. postgresql.org/...
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Sep 10, 2012

“Google rolled an ice cream truck through one area, as a...

“Google rolled an ice cream truck through one area, as a woman on a loudspeaker enticed residents to register.” nytimes.com/...
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Sep 10, 2012

“*1:36* Lionel is wearing shiny copper pants, and that is...

“*1:36* Lionel is wearing shiny copper pants, and that is something I would like to show you right now:” grantland.com/...
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Sep 9, 2012

I was using Mechanical Turk to have people phone me and...

I was using Mechanical Turk to have people phone me and whisper, “momento mori,” but it's even cheaper to automate.
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Sep 9, 2012

Mitt Romney has the sort of name that invading aliens say...

Mitt Romney has the sort of name that invading aliens say all at once. “We are president now Mittromney. Mittromney will obey!”
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Sep 8, 2012

You know I really don't regret time spent not writing. It...

You know I really don't regret time spent not writing. It was okay to just hang back. Nothing was lost. Nothing happens after death.
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Sep 8, 2012

Sometimes you see a set of protocols and think, “I know,...

Sometimes you see a set of protocols and think, “I know, I'll centralize them into a single service.” Now you have one problem.
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Sep 8, 2012

Sometimes the cup sippies you.

Sometimes the cup sippies you.
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Sep 8, 2012

Adulthood has often about learning the limits of my own...

Adulthood has often about learning the limits of my own humility. Will I accept this and move on, or keep both shame and pride?
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Sep 8, 2012

Reading old stuff I wrote it's unsettling how little I've...

Reading old stuff I wrote it's unsettling how little I've changed. The same dramas, except now they're funny.
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Sep 7, 2012

Let them have dreams, not roles. A vending machine filled...

Let them have dreams, not roles. A vending machine filled with doggies, a boat powered by splashing, and everything chewable.
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Sep 7, 2012

People ask about gender differences between the twins. Tell...

People ask about gender differences between the twins. Tell them our little girl can fly while our son rides tigers.
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Sep 7, 2012

oh no I've tried to learn and be good. I can do neither.

@xxbobbyzxx @ftrainpoker oh no I've tried to learn and be good. I can do neither.
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Sep 7, 2012

I know that I suck. But you guys should talk. Bobby has...

@xxbobbyzxx @ftrainpoker I know that I suck. But you guys should talk. Bobby has amazing web things going on.
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Sep 7, 2012

Not so much trolling as playing.

Not so much trolling as playing.
➛
Sep 7, 2012

I apologize for the miscommunication actually I AM here to...

I apologize for the miscommunication actually I AM here to fuck around.
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Sep 7, 2012

We have to stop them! This is basically the film the Fifth...

@crgwbr We have to stop them! This is basically the film the Fifth Element.
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Sep 7, 2012

"I...accept...Rails....”

"I...accept...Rails....”
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Sep 7, 2012

I want to do a really cheesy, annoying deathbed conversion....

I want to do a really cheesy, annoying deathbed conversion. “I can see Tom Bombadil and he is CHEERFUL. Ring a dong dillo!”
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Sep 7, 2012

Not only do these philosophers know nothing but they admit...

Not only do these philosophers know nothing but they admit it.
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Sep 7, 2012

Ludwig Wittgenstein tearfully admitted that the “Big Book”...

Ludwig Wittgenstein tearfully admitted that the “Big Book” is actually the Holy Bible. en.wikipedia.org/...
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Sep 7, 2012

If Georg Cantor had bothered to do automated unit testing...

If Georg Cantor had bothered to do automated unit testing no one would have needed Bertrand Russell to come in and QA.
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Sep 7, 2012

One thing the humanities and sciences can agree on is that...

One thing the humanities and sciences can agree on is that philosophy is ridiculous.
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Sep 7, 2012

Related: Check out this shithot list of thought experiments...

Related: Check out this shithot list of thought experiments on the pēd #Famous_thought_experiments" target="_blank" rel="noopener">http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thought_experiment#Famous_thought_experiments EXPERIMENT...WITH THOUGHT
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Sep 7, 2012

The person sent into space was not a twin but actually a...

The person sent into space was not a twin but actually a cousin! en.wikipedia.org/...
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Sep 7, 2012

I'm thinking about how you could fake the results of other...

I'm thinking about how you could fake the results of other thought experiments. RESEARCHERS FOUND THAT THE ROOM WAS NOT CHINESE.
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Sep 7, 2012

I was on mute talking QA and walked across the East River...

I was on mute talking QA and walked across the East River towards the Freedom Tower. If I live in the future then what am I waiting for.
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Sep 7, 2012

I imagine the conference call company as an enormous cavern...

I imagine the conference call company as an enormous cavern where shrieking crows roost in old speakers.
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Sep 7, 2012

snap judging

snap judging
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Sep 7, 2012

oh yeah this jesca hoop is the good stuff as well

@monbud oh yeah this jesca hoop is the good stuff as well
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Sep 7, 2012

2 kids (one a tall teen the other 9), walking along sharing...

2 kids (one a tall teen the other 9), walking along sharing a single pair of headphones, makes me want to high-five the sunshine.
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Sep 7, 2012

you all know how good that jessie ware album is right?

you all know how good that jessie ware album is right?
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Sep 7, 2012

The Duke Boys were always getting into trouble with Founder...

@peterrojas The Duke Boys were always getting into trouble with Founder Hogg.
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Sep 7, 2012

Founder is a polite way of saying boss.

Founder is a polite way of saying boss.
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Sep 6, 2012

i'm tweeting this from TECO

@schuyler i'm tweeting this from TECO
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Sep 6, 2012

dude come on contenteditable get with the program

@A_L @thejefflarson @harrisj dude come on contenteditable get with the program
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Sep 6, 2012

Scroll wheel in a remote terminal window ladies and...

Scroll wheel in a remote terminal window ladies and gentlemen!
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Sep 6, 2012

I can also just come by the office and hang out.

@thejefflarson I can also just come by the office and hang out.
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Sep 6, 2012

But Palatino is a display typeface.

But Palatino is a display typeface.
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Sep 6, 2012

Unless we copied the idea from them! We heard about it on a...

@anildash @kfan Unless we copied the idea from them! We heard about it on a mailing list. MUST CREDIT MAILING LIST.
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Sep 6, 2012

That's someone else! It's a really positive meme.

@kfan @mlkshk That's someone else! It's a really positive meme.
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Sep 6, 2012

Very skinny people with very big headphones.

Very skinny people with very big headphones.
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Sep 5, 2012

Instead of causing mass carnage with a hugocopter I should...

Instead of causing mass carnage with a hugocopter I should have given $37 to help a village get a well 2.dashes.com/...
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Sep 5, 2012

I THINK those are dolphins. I can't tell through the smoke....

I THINK those are dolphins. I can't tell through the smoke. They are not dolphins. This is not a successful present.
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Sep 5, 2012

Oh god the @anildash hug-o-copter just crashed into a boat...

Oh god the @anildash hug-o-copter just crashed into a boat filled with schoolkids and crashed into the East River.
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Sep 5, 2012

Happy birthday to @anildash look outside what's that...

Happy birthday to @anildash look outside what's that landing it's the HUG-o-copter.
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Sep 5, 2012

I think this is the 20th anniversary of me hating Dinesh...

I think this is the 20th anniversary of me hating Dinesh D'Souza.
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Sep 5, 2012

Calling your friend who was in special ops and whispering...

Calling your friend who was in special ops and whispering "time to kill" is NOT funny and I apologize to the affected families.
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Sep 5, 2012

“For D’Souza, to be an American is to have an apt...

“For D’Souza, to be an American is to have an apt relationship to whites.” newyorker.com/...
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Sep 5, 2012

you have done a fine thing sir I am very happy

@MrBikferd you have done a fine thing sir I am very happy
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Sep 4, 2012

If I got drunk with Totoro I'd be all like, “Totoro, what's...

If I got drunk with Totoro I'd be all like, “Totoro, what's it all about?”
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Sep 4, 2012

“They talked about how there is now a large difference...

“They talked about how there is now a large difference between what is monetizable and what is actually valuable.” nytimes.com/...
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Sep 4, 2012

Waiting at the Church ave stop for a Q in light rain...

Waiting at the Church ave stop for a Q in light rain surrounded by crickets and murmuring people. twitter.com/...
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Sep 4, 2012

there used to be an awesome community garden right there

@frivmo there used to be an awesome community garden right there
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Sep 4, 2012

I thought we weren't going to talk about my cynical knob.

@edsu I thought we weren't going to talk about my cynical knob.
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Sep 4, 2012

It's easy to spot amateurs. They're the ones giving advice.

It's easy to spot amateurs. They're the ones giving advice.
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Sep 4, 2012

I see what you did there.

@djacobs I see what you did there.
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Sep 4, 2012

App idea: Angrdollr. Tap it every time I get angry at tv....

App idea: Angrdollr. Tap it every time I get angry at tv. Every tap a dime. It lifetracks and auto donates to planned phood.
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Sep 4, 2012

Officer I can mansplain this.

Officer I can mansplain this.
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Sep 4, 2012

You might say I BROKE the cabinet lock but I say that I...

You might say I BROKE the cabinet lock but I say that I have an opportunity to learn to FIX the cabinet lock where are you going.
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Sep 3, 2012

a bean that good you don't deprecate all at once

@tcollen @alindeman a bean that good you don't deprecate all at once
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Sep 3, 2012

“He is impervious to reason, and the only thing that can...

“He is impervious to reason, and the only thing that can impress him is the toe of a thick-soled Number Nine boot.” gutenberg.org/...
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Sep 3, 2012

This Spring + MongoDB "Hello World" example...

This Spring + MongoDB "Hello World" example mkyong.com/... is only 8K zipped
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Sep 3, 2012

it is sad, but it leaves a rich legacy of legacy

@mubay it is sad, but it leaves a rich legacy of legacy
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Sep 3, 2012

the yellow wallpaper is sort of like a feminist tron

the yellow wallpaper is sort of like a feminist tron
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Sep 3, 2012

I need to relax so I just changed my desktop background to...

I need to relax so I just changed my desktop background to a soothing "Yellow Wallpaper." OH NO MY GOD.
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Sep 3, 2012

Haskell was designed purely to allow comp sci people to...

@msimoni Haskell was designed purely to allow comp sci people to identify themselves after the digirapture and this is their passwd
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Sep 3, 2012

not lately although man it gets the job done

@PenLlawen not lately although man it gets the job done
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Sep 3, 2012

oh dudes i have some sad news about...

oh dudes i have some sad news about AbstractSingletonProxyFactoryBean jira.springsource.org/...
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Sep 3, 2012

This shows up in Google http://memegenerator.net/instance/90...

This shows up in Google memegenerator.net/...
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Sep 3, 2012

My name is AbstractSingletonProxyFactoryBean: Look on my...

My name is AbstractSingletonProxyFactoryBean: Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair!
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Sep 3, 2012

AbstractSingletonProxyFactoryBean is a “Convenient proxy...

AbstractSingletonProxyFactoryBean is a “Convenient proxy factory bean superclass for proxy factory beans that create only singletons.”
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Sep 3, 2012

Yes! AbstractSingletonProxyFactoryBean! THE BEANIEST BEAN...

@brianellin @LorenDavie Yes! AbstractSingletonProxyFactoryBean! THE BEANIEST BEAN TO EVER BE A BEAN.
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Sep 2, 2012

Right! Use factories to make factories. Java is the...

@LorenDavie Right! Use factories to make factories. Java is the Shenzhen of computer languages.
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Sep 2, 2012

When faced with a problem, ask yourself: How would I do...

When faced with a problem, ask yourself: How would I do this in Struts?
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Sep 2, 2012

I just need to calm down and remember that the web is now...

I just need to calm down and remember that the web is now exclusively for large teams of enterprise developers.
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Sep 2, 2012

I.e. I'm being lazy and was hoping there was a thing that...

@matthewmcvickar I.e. I'm being lazy and was hoping there was a thing that #justworks
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Sep 2, 2012

doesn't take that into account and auto-kills the tweet...

@matthewmcvickar @anywhere doesn't take that into account and auto-kills the tweet button when > 140
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Sep 2, 2012

Screw it, falling back to web intents, whatever in god's...

Screw it, falling back to web intents, whatever in god's name those are.
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Sep 2, 2012

Nerds, in the Twitter @anywhere postbox is there any way to...

Nerds, in the Twitter @anywhere postbox is there any way to have the character count take t.co shortening into account?
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Sep 2, 2012

One Saturday I took a walk to Zipperhead I met a girl there...

One Saturday I took a walk to Zipperhead I met a girl there and she almost knocked me dead deadmilkmen.com/...
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Sep 2, 2012

Who will speak for the professors?

Who will speak for the professors?
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Sep 2, 2012

Wake up America.

Wake up America.
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Sep 1, 2012

that eye by the intel inside is awesome

@nedbat that eye by the intel inside is awesome
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Sep 1, 2012

and make dinner!

@sippey and make dinner!
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Sep 1, 2012

she was the best. "Greatness only occurs when obsession...

@jadedturtle she was the best. "Greatness only occurs when obsession meets complete vulnerability."
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Sep 1, 2012

it usually took me a month just to figure out why i...

@sippey it usually took me a month just to figure out why i disagreed with her.
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Sep 1, 2012

although i think what she'd have wanted more than anything...

@sippey although i think what she'd have wanted more than anything else is a big airbrushed memorial mural on a wall in midtown
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Sep 1, 2012

i know. i wish we could all get together and talk about mad...

@sippey i know. i wish we could all get together and talk about mad men and facebook.
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Sep 1, 2012

man i miss leslie

man i miss leslie
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Sep 1, 2012

ten years ago this was the weirdest possible thing you...

ten years ago this was the weirdest possible thing you could do mirrorproject.com/...
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Sep 1, 2012

write code that evaluates asynchronously? Why does everyone...

write code that evaluates asynchronously? Why does everyone say it's so hard to
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Aug 31, 2012

“Muscle and pluck forever!” —Whitman

“Muscle and pluck forever!” —Whitman
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