Ftrain, by Paul Ford

Coworker C: You couldn't use that headshot on Nerve personals. It makes you look too thin. People would be totally pissed if you showed up.

P: That's what I actually look like. You have to be at that angle.

C: Your face does not look like that now.

P: It's smaller, actually. I was three pounds heavier in that picture.

C: Not in your face.