Ftrain, by Paul Ford

Squarepusher is putting out a song, in October, called F-Train. Apparently, it's wandering the knob-twiddler's file-sharing Internet, in MP3 form, as we speak, but out of my low-bandwidth/Linux reach. The album notes, already transcribed by the Squarepusher faithful, contain the lyrics to F-train and a manifesto, which is pissed-off-academic in tone, but has the fun line: identity-cults can only be effectively generated from one dimensional personalities. The lyrics to F-train make no immediate sense, but do mention Fortran and C++, which is in their favor. I like Squarepusher quite a bit, even if he does noodle till my brain melts. Alas, rather than the Brooklyn-bound Ftrain, the mother of all means of transportation, which is rocking past my window, elevated, as I write, I'll bet he's referring to the Japanese F-Train (they have one, too) or maybe even F-train.com, the Japanese Future Train web site, if he's referring to anything I can think of at all. All it takes is an en-dash and you're somewhere else entirely. I think I deserve a free copy of the album as recompense for all the Squarepusher fans who will be writing in to ask if I know anything about Tom Jenkinson over the next few years. Which I don't!